Date Posted:19:56:35 02/14/08 Thu Author:Jolene Subject: Re: I am 2 years clean & on Methadone In reply to:
Asha
's message, "Re: I am 2 years clean & on Methadone" on 20:53:09 02/13/08 Wed
I prayed and got thru it. It was painful and yes, I was very sick to. But it won't be a life time. I do believe if you want to recover that N/A isn't a style it is a life style. I recommend all recoverying addicts be a part of it. Methadone is a crutch. It should only be used to detox not take every day for two years. I did the same thing. And I had a huge herion habbit so my dose was high. But now I see I can do it on my own. If you really want to be clean you don't need any substance long term. Understandable in the beginning until the withdrawls are finished but after that it just a crutch so you don't have to face the world clean with no habbit forming medication. I am so glad I didn't end up to be one of those that stay on for 10 years. But even 2 years was way to long. And at the time I would have every excuse to be on it. So I would not use herion, end up in jail, end up on the streets, etc. I make me clean. Methadone doesn't make me clean. I just had fear that if I wasn't on anything at all I would have been on herion. The truth is if you want to stop you will stop. The only thing that can make someone clean is themselves and praying to higher power. Methadone is even more potent the herion. It's herion in a pure form. It's a drug. At the time I would justify my being on it...but when I look back now I can see it was just another excuse not to be clean. Because I didn't know how to be. I am so glad you have decided to end that cycle. I'm proud that you came to the decision and have the willingness to face life without any habbit forming medication. I got down to 30mg and quit cold turkey. Which is alot more uncomfortable then detoxing the whole way. But you can look at this way too...feeling how you feel will never let you forget what you went thru. Therefore, being a motivation to get off it that much quicker. The quicker it's over the sooner you'll be free of feeling that way. I know it's hard. I can totally relate. Especially because your body is used to so much. Ibprofen during the day and maybe something over the counter to help you sleep at night like tylanol p.m. Alot of hot showers and baths. You might feel anxious like I did and I took nothing for that. Most thing's prescribed for that are habbit forming and last thing I needed was to start on something new after getting off something as strong as methadone. I feel for you I really do. But give it time and you will feel better. I'm so glad to know you are going thru with this. Some people never do. Good for you Asha!
