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Date Posted: 09:44:09 02/24/08 Sun
Author: Asha (hopeful)
Subject: Re: when I was coming off wanted to speak to someone who had been threwit
In reply to: sally 's message, "Re: when I was coming off wanted to speak to someone who had been threwit" on 20:02:09 02/22/08 Fri

It is true, as Michelle said, yes we do all still think about it sometimes, even when you have quit for a long time it is never like going back to a time before you ever tried heroin, but trust me it is not like how you feel after only having quit for a week - it gets MUCH much easier as time goes on, & the differences are, even if you do think of it, it is only occassionally & does not consume your every waking moment, plus even if you do think about it that doesn't mean you have to lose control & run out & call your dealer. The thought passes quickly & you may not think about it again for a month or a year. At least thats how I feel.

I think the first month of not using (at all) is the hardest. If you can get past that point & start getting your life back together then it only gets easier from then.

I was also like you, Michelle, in that I was living a lie & no one knew, & I felt so alone. It may be terrifying, but you have to tell your family, or someone other than your friends who also do dope. How can they understand what you're going through & be there to support you, & realize what a difficult thing you are accomplishing if you quit? It's way too hard to do it alone. Plus if no one knows it kind of gives you an excuse to keep using - its easy to feel sorry for yourself thinking no one understands, plus if they don't know you won't be letting them down if you relapse. But you do have to remember that most people will not truly understand what it's like unless they've been there, you ultimately have to go through it alone to some degree, however any love & support still helps.

I am here to talk as well, if anyone needs someone to talk to who understands what they are going through. I felt just the same way & was convinced it was impossible to quit & stay clean.

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