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Date Posted: 22:36:14 05/03/03 Sat
Author: Lance
Subject: I just want to say...


make up sex is sooooo good....the best. haha

Everyone is always asking me, "How's JJ" or saying "You never talk about JJ" "how's everything with JJ" and I always say "fine. JJ is fine, I'm fine, everything is fine."

But actually, we've kinda broke up and we've both been seeing other people and everything wasn't so fine. JJ started seeing this one guy and I started going out with a lot of different people and running wild and it wasn't so great.

But then we decided we missed each other too much, because we really are best friends and something awesome would happen to one of us and we would want to share it or something bad would happen and we would need a shoulder to cry on, so we decided to be friends but no sex and we could date whoever we wanted and we wouldn't get mad. But then, once we decided it was OK to date other people, we didn't date anyone. haha

We started being "friends" but we were always doing things deliberately that would remind us of some special intimate moment we had shared together, some private joke, or something funny that we had done. There was a LOT of history between us. I would say or do something or the other way around and then there would be this really awkward silence and each of us knew what the other person was thinking about but neither of us would say it.

We were always out of synch. Sometimes JJ would drop these hints and say "I'm really tired and it's late. Is it OK if I sleep over?" and I would be really mean and say "Sure. You can sleep on the couch. I'm going to bed. I'm tired too. See you in the morning."

Or if I dropped a few hints JJ would be mean and say things that really hurt to try to get a big reaction out of me, try to piss me off. We had some huge fights, but I would always walk away except this past week JJ said something mean. And it hurt my feelings when it was just supposed to make me mad, so the next day JJ felt bad and was trying to be nice and that's when I reeeeally got pissed off and yelled, "Don't you DARE be nice to me. Goddamit do NOT be sweet to me." and I NEVER yell at JJ.

So we had a couple days to cool off. And I was burning some CD's for this wedding that I have to DJ and they wanted some songs from the soundtrack to the movie My Best Friend's Wedding, so I was listening to it. And this one song .. "You Don't Know Me" by Jann Arden just hit me.

You know how it is when every song you hear just takes on meaning. So this one just got to me a little bit and I told JJ to listen to it over the phone.

The lyrics:


You give your hand to me
And then you say hello
And I can hardly speak
My heart is beating so
And anyone can tell
You think you know me well
But you don't know me

No you don't know the one
Who dreams of you at night
And longs to kiss your lips
Longs to hold you tight
Oh I am just a friend
That's all I've ever been
Cause you don't know me

I never knew the art of making love
Though my heart aches with love for you
Afraid and shy I let my chance go by
(yeah, like I'm shy! haha)
The chance that you might love me too

You give your hand to me
And then you say goodbye
I watch you walk away
beside that lucky guy
(God I was soooooo jealous!)
Oh you will never know
The one who loves you so
Cause you don't know me


Now if someone played that song for you, wouldn't you just melt????

All JJ said was, "yeah, that's nice" and I thought, "fuck THIS!" so I said, "Yeah, it's not bad. I have to go. I'll see ya around."

So this morning I went out running and played a little basketball and when I got back JJ surprised me and was sitting on the steps which is amazing considering it was only 8:30 a.m. haha

So we went upstairs and we were joking around and really comfortable together just like things were normal. It was really nice. We were laughing about some of the things we used to do, like tell stories to each other, and JJ asked me to tell my favorite story which is a sex fantasy that is really hot and very sexi, and I said "you already know it by heart". But JJ said, "I forgot some of it. Just tell me the story. Please. And then I have to get going."

So I said, "OK, but you have to be good, and sit quietly, don't interrupt, and no pinching." haha

So JJ sits down on the floor leaning back against the sofa close to where I'm sitting and we can't see each other's faces. And I tell my favorite fantasy that we've both heard a million times before, and when I'm finished JJ leans way back and looks up at me and quietly says, "we can do that if you want to...." and time just stopped...and we kissed.

And it was like two starving people. It really was. We really missed each other so bad. We spent the whole day making up for lost time.

I've never been happier in my life. I have a smile that won't quit. haha.

Right now I have to go DJ at the club the last set, but after work, I'm going to JJ's. YAYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!

God, I am sooooooooo happy. haha.

....so that's how my day went.

I guess JJ DOES know me! haha!

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