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>Cheryl, As I understand it (I can't read every single >entry on this board as it would take too long) from >some of your entries, it is your son who is Autistic >and not you, you are only looking into our world and >will never be able to fully understand the pain, >despair and frustration we feel when we cannot put >into practice all your (NT people as you put it) best >intended and loving advice. For me personally I have >had bucket loads of advice and eventually I get to a >point where I just want to punch my friendly advisor. >I've had people say it's my own fault I was bullied, >etc., I've had people say there is nothing wrong with >me but quickly followed by 'the only thing you have to >work on....' etc. etc. It's sometimes like trying to >drive forward when you're stuck in reverse and no >amount of your passenger honking on the horn is going >to help you or make that car go forward. Don't get me >wrong, I'm not trying to say you are doing a bad job >with your son or that you haven't helped people >involved with Autism but, having spent the past 16 or >so years involved with a psychologist on and off, >suffered depression, bad anger management, bullying (I >think you get the picture), I would very much like for >a few NT friends to have the patience and forethought >to just say 'Hey, I didn't mean it like that, I'm >sorry I hurt your feelings' or 'That was wrong but >that's okay, we'll move on from this mistake and we >can try again next time'. Never forget how blessed >you are to be NT and how much I wish and would give >anything I could to be the same as you. I'm very fond >of (as well as woffling on) giving descriptions so >imagine it like this... you're shopping alone with >your kids, they're creating merry havoc and you loose >your temper which makes you look like a terrible >parent, it would be nice for somebody to come up and >say, hey, I see you're having a bit of trouble, what >can I do to help you? rather than adding to your >misery by sneering and making comments. Shan >PS I'm high functioning Aspergic and have only been >diagnosed for approximately a year so still learning >about me and how to deal with me.
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