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Subject: my shame


Author:
kc
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Date Posted: 08:14:30 11/15/08 Sat

Its been 2 months since i aborted my baby. It was the biggest mistake of my life...that i now know. Im 28 and already have 4 children and before i fell pregnant for the 5th time i would of said that another child would never be a possibility...but after it becoming reality i felt different, it was apart of me. My partner and i have been together for 13 years and from the moment i told him i was pregnant he knew what he wanted and that was not another baby. In the end i know my decision was my own but how could i bring a life into this world knowing my partner never wanted it. He never speaks about it and not sure if he even thinks about it.....me on the other hand cant stop thinking about it, every waking moment and boy is it doing my head in, How do you make the pain stop? killing my baby was the worst decision i have ever made.

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[> Subject: Re: my shame


Author:
Kris
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Date Posted: 15:23:42 11/17/08 Mon

Dear kc,

I am so sorry for your loss. I am glad you found us here. It's really important that you find a way to heal from the hurt/loss/pain. There are many suggestions I've heard over the years - and what works for one person, may be different from what works for you. A really good resource is this website:

http://www.optionline.org/hadabortion.html

They have centers around the USA and you can check to find one close to you. If there's not one close, you can call the 1-800 number or email them. Many of their centers offer FREE Post-Abortion counseling, and that would be really good for you to work through.

It is critical to your other children's well being that you find emotional healing from the experience.

I'm sorry your partner is not talking about it, but typically that's the way guys are about most "big" issues. He just doesn't know how to express the way he feels. Your emotions also go through all the "grief/loss" stages - anger, sorrow, denial, etc. This is a good website about grief/loss.

http://home.att.net/~velvet-hammer/grief.html

I hope that helps, please please call or email or go to a center for the FREE post-abortion counseling.

Hugs,Kris

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