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Subject: Heart broken


Author:
Lisa (depressed)
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Date Posted: 17:37:24 07/28/07 Sat
 I'm a 16 year old that had an abortion on July 25, 2007. Just 4 days after I found out that I was pregnant. I wanted to keep my baby and I had everything planned out.

When my mom found out that I was pregnant, she said to me that I had to get an abortion. She said that my baby would be born unhealthy. I was ready for motherhood. I babysat my baby niece everyday and treated her like she was my baby.

When I went to Planned Parenthood I found out that I was 11 weeks and 5 days pregnant. I asked the nurse if I could see my baby's ultra-sound picture. She showed me it and I was just in awe. My baby looked so precious. I asked the nurse if I could have a copy of the picture and the nurse told me that I can when I come back in 2 weeks for my follow-up exam. Just an hour later I had the procedure done. I cried the whole time. Not because I was in pain; but because I was picturing my precious baby the whole time. The sound of the vacuum killed me.

When it was over, I was escorted to the recovery room. I couldn't stop crying. I missed my baby and regretted ever listening to my mom.

It has only been 2 days and I am still feeling depressed. I hate myself for what I did and I am mad at my mom for forcing me to get the procedure done. I would give ANYTHING to travel back in time to save my precious baby.
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Replies:
[> Subject: Re: Heart broken


Author:
Kris
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Date Posted: 08:34:17 07/29/07 Sun
Dear Lisa,

I'm really sorry about your loss. It's really important that you don't get stuck in this point of your grieving. You will need to work through the pain of this experience and find healing.

You can look up a center near you that offers free post abortion counseling and I highly recommend you do that.

Here is a website:

www.optionline.org

Click on the After Abortion tab and find a center near you to call or go to.

You can also visit some other sites that will have some more discussions going:

http://www.safehavenministries.com/


http://www.redeemedforlife.com/

Please visit them and keep reaching out for the help you need to get through this.

Hugs, Kris

[> Subject: Re: Heart broken


Author:
Anna
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Date Posted: 20:33:05 08/14/07 Tue
Like you Lisa I fell pregnant and wanted desperately to keep my baby, I was 18. When my mother found out she became abusive and made me doubt that I would be able to cope with everything, and threatened to turn all my family against me. Despite all my fears and knowing it was not what I or my partner wanted, I had an abortion at 7 weeks.
Unfortuneately they showed me the ultrasound at the clinic after they had given be the drugs, there was no turning back.
2 years on I am now 6 months pregnant and have had to have another scan for this pregnancy. However my body just cant accept that I am having another child. That little blob of my first child has haunted my every night since the abortion, and I have no bond with this pregnancy like I thought I should have.
I dont know what to do as the pain and guilt I felt afterwards is still just as strong today and it's stopping me from being able to love the beautiful child that I thought I would never be able to have.
I had no idea how much of an impact one decision could have on the rest of my life.
If there is any support I can offer you please write to me. I still have no answers on how to make the pain go away but just know your not alone in your grief.
[> Subject: Re: Heart broken


Author:
Pat
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Date Posted: 00:44:29 08/16/07 Thu
Lisa,

I am so sorry! What your mother did was cruel and abusive. You have every right to be outraged. I am outraged. Please try to tell her how much she hurt you.

It will undoubtedly have a very strong impact on how you feel about your mother.

Once you have had a chance to express your outrage, it is good if you experience emotional and spiritual healing. In order to do that, you will eventually have to forgive your mother. Your emotions won't want to forgive her, so I will explain what forgiveness is. Forgiveness is a decision, not a feeling. It is the decision to take into yourself the hurt and harm that your mother did to you, and to release her from all of your outrage. It would definitely be better if she can see what she did, but it isn't necessary. You can make the decision to forgive her, regardless of what she says and does. I am sure she really doesn't begin to understand what she did to you. It will take time to arrive at a point where you can do this. Give yourself a chance to grieve, and when you are ready, you will be able to forgive her. Ask for God's help. Remember, Jesus forgave those who killed Him, and so did the first recorded Christian martyr, Stephen.

I have a friend who was physically held down and forced to submit to an abortion against her will. She has become fully reconciled, and she is at peace, and she is one of the sweetest people I have ever met. She is a real inspiration to me. Her name is Suzanne. Please think of her as you work through this.

The links other people gave you are excellent. Please avail yourself of them.

I am praying for your healing.

Hugs,
Pat
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