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|Subject: past abortion
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Date Posted: 21:27:24 09/10/05 Sat
I am almost thirty, which means I had an abortion 15 years ago 2 days before my 15th birth day. It still haunts me. I remember going to the clinic ( 2day procedure) all of the protesters were outside telling my how horrible I was. The nurse ask all the usual question and once told me that if I continued to cry they could not proceed. I asured her I was ther on my own free will.Inside I was thinking how can I can a child and then celebrate my own birthday in a few days.I also told myself to just get it over with and then I could block it out of my mind forever. Life did go on and I did seem to put it in the back of my mind, but I have never forgave myself and I dont know how, I have no excuse except I was selfish and didnt want to give up my teenage life. My parents would have forgiven me and even help me in any way I needed, Iwas just SELFISH. aT THE AGE OF 25 I got pregnant again and even though I was happy I could not enjoy my pregnancy. I was terrified thet god would pay me back for what I had done by taking this child because I wanted to keep it. She is now almost five and I live in fear of losing her as payback for my selfishness. I am still not against abortion it is a womans right but one she should be well informed on and think it over for her own self not influenced by parents or boyfriend, or even fear of losing friends and free life.
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[> Subject: Re: past abortion
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Date Posted: 09:26:57 09/11/05 Sun
I know many women who have had abortions, and none of them have been happy they had one once it was done with. I was also faced with an unplanned pregnancy at 17 and I know the shear fear when faced with that dilema. I went to Planned Parenthood and was offered an abortion - but I was also in a Catholic High School at the time and I knew what they taught about abortion and I just couldn't go through with that. Unfortunately, I miscarried - and that was traumatic as well. I had to ask my parents to take me to the ER - that's how they found out I was pregnant. Anyhow, I just tell you this so you know I know some of what I am talking about. I have not had an abortion - so I can't say I have walked in your shoes - but I do understand many of the aspects of such things. I've also seen the lifelong hurt and scars it leaves behind. That's why I do not think abortion is good for any woman.
You need to forgive yourself, you also need to ask God to forgive you and realize God loves you and your 5 year old daughter and He is not some big guy up in the sky waiting for his chance to snatch her from you! He gave her to you - He entrusted her to you - becuase you are worthy of having her.
This is a good web-site to visit as well:
please visit it.
You can also look up a pregnancy center in your area - many of them offer FREE post-abortion counseling - or can direct you to a support group:
I encourage you to call them. You can also lend support to other women who have walked in your shoes and gain support from them as well.
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