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Subject: lost


Author:
liz
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Date Posted: 20:36:39 04/25/06 Tue

I am 21 years old and i have had two abortions. My first one was forced by my father i was 18 and my daughter had just turned one. I never thought i would have to go through that again, i had talked about my first experience once and then never spoke of it again. The second one was my fault..i was scared and it was the first thing i thought to do i know that sounds horrible i just wanted a good life for my daughter. I never spoke about the second one and i guess i just shut myself off i had no feelings and then around a month ago it hit me....i feel like dying i am so miserable and its all i can think about. I sit on these websites and read for hours and i have noone to talk to about this...noone understands around me and i feel alone and empty i started drinking and now its the only thing i can do to keep my mind off of it. I don't know how to deal anymore i have never felt so empty and i am so worried that my daughter will hate me because sometimes i just shut off. I love her more than life itself and i don't know how i could do this to her or my other children. I would have 3 beautiful children now. I feel selfish and i can't fix myself i keep closing down and it scares me i want to feel and i just can't. I just need help

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Replies:
[> Subject: Re: lost


Author:
Mary Binder
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Date Posted: 13:51:55 04/26/06 Wed

I went THROUGH the exact same thing you are going through now and I want to tell you that there is hope, healing and forgiveness through the love of Jesus Christ. I suffered in silence for 15 years because I didn't know that I could be forgiven and He would heal my wounds from abortion. I was tormented and I could not bond very well with my living children because I hated myself, but GOD heard me when I cried out to Him and He answered me and was faithful to forgive. That is only part of my testimony but I want you to know that you are not alone and what you are experiencing is post traumatic stress disorder, the majority of women that submit to abortion have this happen. Depression, anxiety, grief, regret, anger, etc..., I want you to go to this website and here is the toll free number for after abortion help. Most of the women themselves are post abortive and have experience. Just remember healing is a process but you are taking the best first step so that you can be the mom you need to be for your family. Can you email me too so we can talk more at mjschoettle@aol.com the toll free number is 1-866-468-8279

Love and Hugs,

Mary


[> Subject: Re: lost


Author:
Mary Binder
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Date Posted: 14:01:21 04/26/06 Wed

this is Mary again, I want to give you a few websites.
www.hopemonument.com or org. www.operationoutcry.org
www.afterabortion.org

operation outcry website is also the helpline number I gave you.

Mary


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