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THE RALPH TOMATO BOARD

Celebrity Obits

Dead Pool 2008

Subject	Author	Date
I let my 12 year old neice use my computer. When I got on it, I saw that she had typed in "How to deep throat" (NT)	it makes me want to cry	6/09/08 18:31
God, that's so sad. Little girls of 12 shouldn't even know what that is, let alone wonder about technique! When I was 12, my only conserns were playing with the cat, making backyard tents, learning how to knit and Sarsparilla soft drink. It's dreadful when kids get no childhood. Seriously, I'd be asking who's telling her about this - they need their arse's kicked. Hard. (NT) -- Kim, 6/09/08 23:30 I would let her know that what she types can sometimes be traced. For her own protection. -- Teller, 7/09/08 8:13

Is the knocked up daughter of McCain's VP really named "Bristol"??! If so......Ralph Tomato! (NT)	Kim	2/09/08 13:35
her children: -- Barbara, 2/09/08 13:42 Trackto???.......TRACKTO???.....and TRIG??....OMG! That's child abuse, right there! Makes Bob Geldof's kids seem lucky by comparision. That's just awful, They can't possibly have this woman as VP! If McCain wins I can't be hearing about The Adventures of Trig and Trackto over here for the next 5 years!! (NT) -- Kim, 2/09/08 13:47 Trackto -- Barbara, 2/09/08 15:08 A Down's Syndrome kid named Trig??...I....don't....know....what....to....say....Although I wish there was an icon with it's eyebrows on the ceiling. (NT) -- Kim, 2/09/08 16:17 Like this? -- Kathy, 3/09/08 2:08 That's the one! Perfect! Thanks, Kathy. (NT) -- Kim, 3/09/08 8:39 How old is Trackto to be going off to Iraq and is that an Eskimo name? His sister is preggers and will also be leaving home - why are they trying to escape home? (NT) -- Micki...and who's child is little Trig? I can't wait for this week's Enquirer., 3/09/08 10:36 Piper and Willow Are Sane Girl Names -- David S., 6/09/08 18:31 hmmm . . . the only Piper I've ever heard of is the actress, -- Barbara, 7/09/08 1:49 "The kids in Bristol are sharp as a pistol, when they do the Bristol stomp!" (NT) -- The Dovells, 3/09/08 1:10 Yeah, wonder how many kids have been in Bristol? (NT) -- Teller, 3/09/08 6:42 At least one (NT) -- Kathy, 3/09/08 8:04 What makes it worse is Bristol is rhyming slang for bosom in the UK - Bristol City= titty. So I bet the English finding her name more amusing than I do. (NT) -- Kim, 3/09/08 8:44 Kim, I see you're bristling at Sarah's taste in names. (NT) -- Jeanne, 7/09/08 7:59

You know with all this "double standard" talk we been hearing about since Palin's arrival, that I thought ...	Teller	5/09/08 6:29
So Sarah Palin said in her church that Iraq was a task from God. Obama listened to "God damn America" in his church for 20 years (NT) -- Which is worse?, 5/09/08 7:53 Don't care. The Republicans have had 8 years. Bye-Bye -- Teller, 5/09/08 8:28 The moment that charmed America -- & scared Joe Biden crapless!, 5/09/08 9:10 Look Joe Biden has been scared crapless for years. -- Teller, 5/09/08 10:02 Joe Biden isn't scared at all. He's fearless: -- Another Karen, 6/09/08 8:16 I was watching this woman's speech and I have to say she's articulate enough, but do you really want a VP whose political views are slightly to the right of Ghengis Khan? Pro-gun, pro-life, against sex education with a knocked up daughter (you're getting a taste of how well that policy works right there) and with an old codger as a running partner. You could be looking at your next President right there. I think she's all smooth and shiny, but she's also very scary in a Stephen King presidental candidate in Dead Zone kind of way. (NT) -- Kim, 5/09/08 10:03

Scenes from a hotel lobby, suggested by Bill's ref to Mahler in another thread.	Jeanne	31/08/08 5:53
Aren't people vile? How hard is it to be nice? And don't these people know you can spit in their breakfast coffee? I have to put up with ghastly ticks too - but at least I can drug them unconcious if they get too out of hand. (NT) -- Kim, 31/08/08 9:25 Oh, Jeanne, I feel for you! I HATE SERVICE JOBS! -- Bill T., 31/08/08 10:39 Actually .... -- Jeanne, 31/08/08 11:11 For your case, you are right - management in for profit companies DO get good wages/salaries. I had the "double dose": shit wages AND having to work with customers who just love to fuck with you because you are the face of a State agency that they already hate, so they are going to make your "service" experience with them as miserable for you as possible. I got good stories out of my Jobs from Hell experiences; at least you got the mortgage paid off and don't have to worry about your son being in debt to Sallie Mae for centuries. (NT) -- Bill T., 1/09/08 5:19 Jeanne - your post gave me a laugh!! I've been a waiter for years and I can relate (NT) -- Danny (Louisville), 1/09/08 0:25 Jeanne, I suggest to purge the horror of your "hospitality industry experience" from your mind that you read (or re-read, no doubt) David Sedaris' hysterically funny "SantaLand Diaries" about when he was so low on the job chain that he applied for and got a job at Macy's as a SantaLand Elf. NPR plays it every Christmas season several times (and always once on Christmas Eve). It's amusing to read, but to hear it read by the author with his inimitable voice, style and delivery is truly one of life's rich experiences. (NT) -- Bill "Crumpit" T., 1/09/08 10:28 Bill - it's been something since I read that Sedaris book- glad you mentioned it... -- Danny (Louisville), 1/09/08 15:32 Danny, Sedaris is a scream and so is his sister Amy in "Strangers with Candy" and anytime she's on Letterman.... -- Bill T., 2/09/08 4:17 Thanks Bill! and yes... -- Danny (Louisville), 2/09/08 12:00 Thanks for the long reply, Danny..... -- Bill T., 3/09/08 3:21 Bill - I forgot to mention... -- Danny (Louisville), 3/09/08 15:20 You're right, at times Amy as Jeri..... -- Bill T., 4/09/08 3:39 Bill T - Swoosie is 64!... -- Danny (Louisville), 5/09/08 23:25

Since the name of the board is "Ralph", can we address the pronunciation of Ralph Fiennes first name? He pronounces it 'Rafe", but spells it "Ralph". (NT)	Spell it the way it sounds!	4/09/08 9:39
"Rafe" is the British prononciation but it used to be the American pronounciation, too. Ralph Waldo Emerson, the 19th-c American orator and philosopher, was a Rafe. (NT) -- Jeanne, 4/09/08 10:14 I like the pronounciation of 'leff-tenant' for lieutenant. Otherwise it sounds like 'loo attendant'. Not classy. (NT) -- Kim, 4/09/08 12:04 They'd have had to get a different actor to play Rafe Kramden, don'tcha think? -- Kathy, 5/09/08 3:28 I think if Rafe Feinnes is going to turn into a Ralph, he's going to have to gain 100kg and start wearing track pants. (NT) -- Kim, 5/09/08 9:56

Amy Winehouse brain damaged fears	Surprised?	2/09/08 16:24
Maybe if it's just me, but if I had all that money and 36 free hours, I would not spend it getting shitfaced on dope. For a start, how do you remember if you had a good time? (NT) -- Kim, 2/09/08 16:25 These young pop stars just don't get the old style slide downhill. Back then it was always "Die young and leave a good looking corpse", not like now where it's "Die young and leave a ravaged, rapier-thin vestige of something that might have been human at one time". (NT) -- Bill T., 3/09/08 3:09 I come from the Get A Business Degree and Save Your Money generation - the 80s. Members of Spandau Ballet and Duran Duran didn't mess their hair up let alone go down the drug ravaged route. (NT) -- Kim, 3/09/08 8:53 Comment on drugs - moderation people. -- Teller, 3/09/08 10:17 Well no one would argue that sparking up an occasional doob or the odd glass of vino is anything other than a recreational enjoyment. But devoting 36 hours to it is idiotic. That girl needs a hobby. (NT) -- Kim, 3/09/08 11:15 Billy love beer! We have tons of micro-breweries here in Seattle, because after we're all hopped up on coffee, we need something to calm us down, but, Kim's right. That Amy nightmare needs a hobby. Food tripping when she's high might be a start. (NT) -- Bill T., 4/09/08 3:43 Oh, by the way, Teller..............Rick Steves the guy on PBS with the Travels Through Europe show..... -- Bill T., 4/09/08 3:45 ....oh, sorry, it was the "Hemp Fair". Me fordot. (NT) -- Bill T., 4/09/08 3:46 Here in A2, we have a yearly Hash Bash that's been going on since 1972. -- Micki...I can't believe it's on Wikipedia!, 4/09/08 8:52 Yeah, those 80s people just go into nursing, retire go Brisbane, get a cat and spend their evenings dressing up in kitten heels and get drunk on Shiraz! (NT) -- Bill "Mrow!" T., 4/09/08 3:41 Sounds a better option than getting covered in scabs and losing teeth. I'll take my Shiraz and a night on the town in kitten heels over sitting around a grubby flat getting shitfaced anyday. (NT) -- Kim, 4/09/08 11:21 "Cannabis overdose" my arse, people. She may have been smokin something, but it wasn't weed. On the other hand, if she ate enough of it she could hallucinate and flip out... (NT) -- Micki...I think she's still crackin..., 3/09/08 10:42

Does anyone here have a creative outlet? David S writes poetry, Bill writes and I knit (just like Joan Crawford, I clack merrily away creating knitwear). But what does everyone else do? (NT)	Kim	28/08/08 2:11
I'm a dab hand at embroidery. I also make my own silk scarves. A designed scarf costs $300 or more, so I buy silk yardage, cut it and hand roll the hems. (NT) -- Jeanne, 28/08/08 2:25 Embroidery is one of those things I wish I could do. I'm too clumsy and apt to harpoon myself. Tapestry I can do - blunt needles, big holes. But I never can get faces right. I have a tapestry of Elizabeth I which I worked on for 25 years and could never stop her looking like she had Downs Syndrome. I gave up in the end. (NT) -- Kim, 28/08/08 11:32 Back in the 70's when it was all the rage, I used to be very crafty. -- Barbara, 28/08/08 4:32 ....well, Baboo, maybe when you have those cold winds and rains in the winter, you'll get bac to doing crafts again. You've always been crafty, though (wink) (NT) -- Bill T., 28/08/08 5:32 What's crewel, Barb? (NT) -- Kim, 28/08/08 11:27 Crewel is cruel !!! -- Barbara, 28/08/08 11:44 That's the problem with some crafts. They're beautiful when finished but doing them can be torture! -- Kim, 28/08/08 11:51 hooking a rug has to be the easiest of all crafts. -- Barbara, 28/08/08 13:26 I can see how you'd need a bit of room to move with it. I like the idea of being able to freestyle it! I have an ancient rug hook from my Mum. I may drag it out and have a go. You've inspired me. Is there a difference with the canvases like in tapestry? (NT) -- Kim, 28/08/08 16:33 Well, I haven't done it in a long time but the canvases are all the same. -- Barbara, 29/08/08 4:43 I always hang on to that stuff, because you never know what might inpire you to take it up again. I know a few times I've sat there kniting away and the next time I see the person I was with they're halway through a scarf Craft is very.... -- Kim, 29/08/08 10:32 What does Norma Shearer do when you are clacking annoyingly away, Kim? (NT) -- George Cukor, 28/08/08 5:42 She grits her teeth, dear boy! (NT) -- Kim, 28/08/08 11:26 I draw people -- Darren, 28/08/08 15:29 Wow! That really is a talent. -- Barbara, 28/08/08 16:32 I think that's a great idea for a theme! It's something a bit different and it showcases Darren's talents. Fab! (NT) -- Kim, 28/08/08 16:35 Yeah I could do that- -- Darren, 28/08/08 23:37 What a great talent! (NT) -- the Chronicler, 29/08/08 5:24 I'll send you a photo to commission for me. (NT) -- the Chronicler, 29/08/08 5:26 I did that once before.. -- Darren, 29/08/08 10:04 I don't think you could ask for a better compliment to your work than that, Darren. You might be hanging on a few walls you don't know about, as well. (NT) -- Kim, 29/08/08 10:34 That's quite a feather in your cap, Darren. Douglas, Jr. was quite the art connoiseur like the late Vincent Price, too. If you ask me to take a capital letter "B" and make an Easter Bunny out of it, I'd muck it up. (NT) -- Bill T., 29/08/08 4:14 By trade, I am in multi-media visual arts (digital/video production), and am an unpublished playwrite, novelist, biographer and accomplished bon vivant chronicler extrordinaire. ...Oh and I lecture occasionally on humility. -- the Chronicler, 29/08/08 5:10 The only thing I've gotten published are two letters to the editor in The New Yorker magazine and a couple of those little "blind" items that they use to fill in unused space that I sent in from local papers here. (NT) -- Bill "Wah" T., 29/08/08 9:58 I Write Stories and Books As Well. (NT) -- David S., 31/08/08 21:22 I obsess about Dear Bebe Daniels. (NT) -- Tina De Soto, 4/09/08 3:49

Haunted spice rack	Kathy	3/09/08 15:15
It's up to $152??? There was someone selling a haunted smurf a while back, with a long winded and improbable story to accompany it. I wonder how they got on? (NT) -- Kim, 3/09/08 21:52

McCain picks a female for Veep- Sarah Palin, gov. of Alaska!	Surprise!	30/08/08 2:41
I gotta hand it to the McCain team- they kept this totally under wraps! I never heard her name mentioned once -- politico, 30/08/08 2:42 Yes, but is Palin Teflon coated against the scandals that and being revealed layer by layer in Washington, D.C. about Alaska? -- Bill "Leggo my Igloo" T., 30/08/08 3:52 Boy, people are quick! there's already McCain- Palin items for sale on Ebay! (NT) -- !, 30/08/08 5:54 Could he pander anymore to Hillary voters? -- Teller, 30/08/08 6:51 Hey, if McCain only gets a fraction of disaffected Hillary voters, it could spell the differance! (NT) -- D., 30/08/08 7:16 ....and she's a former "beauty queen"....McCain likes to surround himself with Stepford women, doesn't he? (NT) -- Bill T., 30/08/08 9:51 Disaffected Hillary voters won't go for her.......Alaskan republicans are arch conservatives and environmental plunderers and..... -- Bill T., 30/08/08 9:55 She's an NRA, gun-toting, moose killer. Plus she's anti-choice. -- Barbara, 30/08/08 12:59 You Got To Hand Her For One Thing -- David S., 31/08/08 21:15 Well, she is "Teflon Palin" then. But, how much of her..... -- Bill T., 1/09/08 5:29 Oh, I meant "Bush Baby in vitro", not "Busy Baby" - oh, that sounds like a child porno movie. (NT) -- Bill T., 1/09/08 5:30 Yeah? Her husband is one of those corrupt oil people. I hear he still has his job. (NT) -- Barbara, 2/09/08 4:27 Moose meat. Mmmmmmm...... (NT) -- Homer Simpson, 2/09/08 1:22 McCain camp just announced Palin's 17 year old unmarried daughter is pregnant (NT) -- Is this even a scandal in this day & age?, 2/09/08 3:39 Nope, it's a non-story, just like Cheney's lesbian daughter was a non-story. If anything, I think this revelation of the preggo 17-year-old will make Palin more sympathetic to voters. (NT) -- Jeanne, 2/09/08 5:52 How so? Because she's for abstinance-only sex education in public schools? (NT) -- Teller, 2/09/08 6:50 Well, Teller, because it makes her seem more like one of us, the typical middle-class folks. Having a mongoloid child and a pregnant teenage daughter means she's in touch with ordinary life, ordinary problems. It makes her sympathetic. (NT) -- Jeanne, 2/09/08 7:51 Doesn't qualify her to be VP, however. -- Teller, 2/09/08 8:05 Well, I can't see that Obama has much more in the way of qualifications. That's the problem this year - McCain is too old, Obama is too young and neither veep candidate inspires confidence either. Hey, Kim, move over, I'm emigrating to Australia. (NT) -- Jeanne, 2/09/08 8:17 Well Obama's 4 years older than JFK was. -- Teller, 2/09/08 9:48 Teller, you and I are the same age and we are, I believe, the only ones here old enough to remember JFK. We both know that he was an inept president who came closer than anyone this century to embroiling us in nuclear war. He was young, charming, inexperienced and good-looking, just like Obama. (NT) -- Jeanne, 2/09/08 10:34 He stood his ground against the Russian missles in Cuba. That was enough. -- Teller, 2/09/08 10:51 Hey, hey, hey.......I'm well into my 53rd year and remember the JFK years and all the talk of his ineptitude ("I am a pastry/Ich bein ein Berliner"), sexual imbroglios, etc., but you're right in that the difference between a 3rd grader in 1962 and junior high kids (you two) was quite a gap back then, now it's nothing! (NT) -- Bill T., 3/09/08 3:26 Sorry, Bill. I thought you'd be too young to remember the early 60's. (NT) -- Jeanne, 3/09/08 11:02 She has made more executive decisions than Obama and Biden combined, she is the most popular governor in the nation with a whopping 80% approval rating among voters, and no one has ever questioned whether a man running for president should be running because they had kids at home. (NT) -- Micki...Obama said this is a non-issue and that his mother was 18 when he was born, 3/09/08 10:49

Arrrrghhhhhhh------Tina - I've found her (for all the oldsters from Pioneer Days)	Bill T.	3/09/08 8:46
Oh, by the way her e-mail address didn't cut and paste but it's bebedeforest@aol.com.......I mean, how retarded is that, using AOL? Does anyone use that shit-for-brains Internet service anymore except The Keeper of the Bebe Daniels Flame? (NT) -- Bill T., 3/09/08 8:47 Somehow it gives a sense of continuity to things to know Tin's out there still obsessing about Bebe. (NT) -- Kim, 3/09/08 8:49 That's be Tina - I really need to wake up properly before I post. (NT) -- Kim, 3/09/08 8:50 Oh crap - THAT'D be TINA.....I need coffee now!! (NT) -- Kim, 3/09/08 8:50

Good food comes to she who waits	Kathy	3/09/08 3:36
Yes......just last week and... -- Bill T., 3/09/08 4:02 Only once. -- Teller, 3/09/08 6:32 God, Teller, that reminds me how desperate we all were in younger days to get in on those AM Top-40 station call lines for the pathetic freebies they handed out....or just to request a song that had already been played to death that very day. (NT) -- Bill T., 3/09/08 8:38 A good friend of mine would always get on the Saturday night request line if he knew we were all home (this is during my high school years). It was a hoot. But, back on topic, I knew I'd win tickets to see Nigel Planer launching a book when I was living in the UK. That was a hoot. (NT) -- Kim, 3/09/08 8:47

Is Queen Bee not the greatest Crawford film of them all? (NT)	Kim	29/08/08 23:38
Are you forgetting 'Trog"? (NT) -- D., 30/08/08 2:26 How can anyone forget "Trog!". -- Bill T., 1/09/08 5:37 Best line: "After all don't they say, music shooz the savage breast?"......! (NT) -- Kim, 1/09/08 8:25 Oh, I forgot about that line, Kim! In all fairness, it's tough to figure out if the way her lines come out is because a). she's shitfaced drunk; b.) bad laminate caps and bad dental work; c.) all of the above. (NT) -- Bill "Roll the ball, Trog!" T., 1/09/08 10:18 I'd go with pissed....in the Australian sense. (NT) -- Kim, 3/09/08 8:42 "Queen Bee" Rules! -- Bill T., 30/08/08 4:04 D, it's way better than 'Trog'! And yes, I've seen it many times before, I was.... -- Kim, 30/08/08 9:52 .....and she wears gloves and full make-up when she's in her bed in the wake-up scene...... -- Bill T., 30/08/08 10:03 Well, if Crawford drunk is what you want - go no further than Humouresque! She doesn't have a glass out of her hand for the whole running time! (NT) -- Kim, 30/08/08 10:28 The actress that plays Joan's cousin in "Queen Bee"........ -- Bill T., 2/09/08 4:08 I love "Sudden Fear" too - but not sure if Joan's inebriated during her filming -- Danny (Louisville), 1/09/08 15:37 I love that film! I want one of those dictaphones! (NT) -- Kim, 1/09/08 21:44 That's "Touch" (later Mike) Connors, Danny. I know you knew that, you just have a Louisville brain fart. It's allowed now and then. -- Bill "The Stickler" T., 2/09/08 3:53

Well, today was SusieQ's b'day. I had hoped she'd check in. Hope too, she had a happy day. (NT)	Barbara	1/09/08 12:34
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, SUSAN ROSE!!!!!! That's right! Her birthday falls on Labor/Labour Day. We all miss you a bunch!!!! (NT) -- Bill T., 2/09/08 4:19 Hey, Susan! Happy Birthday! Hope you're reading this. Come back. We miss you! (NT) -- love from Jeanne, 2/09/08 8:02 Did you know, Susan, that you share the SAME September 1st birthday as My Dear Bebe Daniels? (NT) -- Tina DeSoto, 3/09/08 8:40

Question	Bill T.	1/09/08 10:41
Obama's father died in a car accident around 1982. His mother died of cancer in the 90's (NT) -- D., 1/09/08 11:47 Pic of Obama & dad, circa 1971 -- Link, 1/09/08 11:48 Pic of Obama & mom, mid 60's -- ., 1/09/08 11:49 Thanks, everybody. I didn't know any of these facts. I read a big profile of him in the New Yorker and the death of either of his parents wasn't mentioned, but they did give lots of information about his grandparents, time in Hawaii, the good prep school he attended there and his time in Indonesia and quotes from his half-sister, but didn't mention diddly about his parents' passing. That must've been tough for him. Thanks for banishing my ignorance regarding this, Link! (NT) -- Bill "I'm Now an Informed Voter" T., 2/09/08 4:22 ...and Thanks, D., too! (NT) -- Bill "Me Forget" T., 2/09/08 4:23

Today's "Inspirational" pic.	Bill T.	2/09/08 4:00

Quandry	Bill T.	30/08/08 10:23
Chronicler should be by here eventually, I would think. I dare say he isn't much in the mood for posting at the moment, but he knows we love him and we're thinking about him and his family. (NT) -- Kim, 30/08/08 10:32 Well, for one thing, -- Barbara, 30/08/08 13:03 Well, to be honest Barb, you have so much more traffic than me I think it'd be asking for trouble lifting your password. Besides, if someone thinks they can top... -- Kim, 30/08/08 22:18 I didn't know who the gate keeper was for the obit board (I look retarded AND I am retarded because of all the meds I take - I can't remember anything).....so don't take anything I say personally. I do remember one time, though, Baboo, you purged quite a few posts of mine when I went off in a vile frenzy on the old board. I cringe and laugh about it every so often. (NT) -- Bill "Mea Culpa" T., 1/09/08 5:33 And shes still deleting mine. But I guess because.. -- Teller, 1/09/08 6:15 You have a forum, Teller? You've been keeping that a secret, haven't you? Where, when and what's it about? As for Barb deleting posts..... -- Kim, 1/09/08 8:43 Well I really changed it when the troll took over Duke's -- Teller, 1/09/08 9:49 Looks intriguing, Teller. I'll have to get familiar with the ebb and flow and them decide if I should dip my toe in the water or just look at the water (like that ancient Greek guy that stared at himself in the water all the time). I can foam at the mouth when it comes to politics.....so for now, I'll just visit. (NT) -- Bill "All Eligible U.S. Citizens Must Vote or be Executed" T., 1/09/08 10:16

More Tales From "L'il Ebola"	Bill T.	1/09/08 7:56

I didn't see this pic this month, so I wanted to share it.	Teller	31/08/08 6:58
No, it hasn't been up and it's a scream! Where'd you go on vacation? (NT) -- Jeanne, 31/08/08 7:05 Holden Beach NC -- Teller, 31/08/08 7:20 What's a 'gated community'? (NT) -- Kim, 31/08/08 9:26 It has a guard shack you have to stop at. (NT) -- Teller, 31/08/08 9:46 There's a guard that stops you getting into the beach? To stop drunken yobs using the area I presume? (NT) -- Kim, 31/08/08 10:06 There is plenty of access to the beach. The house was on the beach. -- Teller, 31/08/08 10:37 The "gated community" is a hold over from the days when you didn't want to be around the "wrong people", e.g., people with credit accounts at Sears, nouveau riche with money......no it's a selling point for people buying luxury homes, vacation homes.....a selling point like those new "grand rooms" that McMansions have. (NT) -- Donald Trump, 31/08/08 10:33 This house had 6 bedtooms and 6 1/2 bathrooms. -- Teller, 31/08/08 10:46 That's sounds quite a hoot. Lots of space, privacy and a yob free beach. I'd be in it! (NT) -- Kim, 31/08/08 15:34 Sounds luxurious. Next year if I'm still in the shelter, we'll do a vacation switch and I can have the Donald Trump Cottage on the NC shore and you can regale in the Horror of DESC! (NT) -- Bill T., 1/09/08 5:24

Madonna compares McCain to Hitler	It's crap like this that turn people off	26/08/08 4:56
Yeah right, I going to vote the way Madonna tells me too. NOT. (NT) -- Teller, 26/08/08 5:44 Look, McCain is not my choice (neither is Obama, for that matter), but..... -- Bill T., 26/08/08 7:01 Why would anyone care what that old trout thinks? (NT) -- Kim, 26/08/08 13:52 I just WISH that all these show biz types would keep their political opinions to themselves. Okay, so you earn your living acting/singing/spinning plates on your nose - how, pray tell, does that qualify you as a political pundit? (NT) -- Jeanne- somebody tell Streisand that people who don't have people from Hollywood telling them how to vote are the luckiest people in the world., 28/08/08 5:46 Jeanne, people used to believe what Ronald Reagan said in those old Chesterfield cigarette ads in the 1950s -- Bill T., 28/08/08 9:51 The media will stick a microphone in front of 'celebrities' and ask them for an an opinion just to stir a bit of controversy. Some are descrete enough to pass making comment, but a gobshite like Madonna would think people actually valued her opinion. And she's not alone there. She won't be the last to put her 2 cent worth in. And BTW, I can't believe how long your elections drag on for! (NT) -- Kim, 28/08/08 11:19 And the day after this one ends, the race for 2012 starts! (NT) -- D., 28/08/08 11:21 I can hardly wait. (NT) -- Kim, 28/08/08 11:53 I really hope for election reform in this country. -- Bill T., 29/08/08 4:17 I don't know why no one has figured out that impossibly log campaigning leads to voter apathy. Here - 8 weeks max and it's over. And even that makes us restless for it to be over. (NT) -- Kim, 29/08/08 10:19 We Should Have Told These people As Well -- David S., 31/08/08 21:20 I agree - what a list of rogues you posted, David S.! (NT) -- Bill T., 1/09/08 5:21

Museum defies pope over crucified frog	Froggy Went a Courtin'	30/08/08 3:58
It's such an ugly object , and as stupid as the singing fish (remember THAT crooning 'Take Me To The River'?), that if no one had made a fuss about it, it would have been stuffed in a bottom drawer by now instead of being an international news item. (NT) -- Kim, 30/08/08 9:46 Don't insult singing fish. Why, your very own Queen of Australia, Her Maj Liz Two, owns a singing Billy Bass .... -- Jeanne, 31/08/08 13:29 God, how ghastly. The sooner we get those Euro-trash off the throne the better. (NT) -- Kim, 31/08/08 15:35

Australia suffering 'man drought'	Come on over fellas!	30/08/08 22:19
And the one's left behind aren't much chop. I think America and Britain have pinched all the good ones! Give Hugh Jackman back! (NT) -- Kim, 31/08/08 10:16 The Aussie men have all left for the winter to go to Fire Island and Sin Fracrisco for the summer. (NT) -- Richard Simmons, 31/08/08 10:29 Wouldn't surprise me in the least. (NT) -- Kim, 31/08/08 15:32

New Zealand's greatest 60's band- Chants R & B!	ol' rocker	31/08/08 9:13
And here's their best song- "Neighbor, Neighbor"! -- Play it LOUD!!!, 31/08/08 9:14 The New Zealanders have a really irritating habit of producing excellent bands. They usually have to come to Australia to 'make it' but they're annoyingly good. Dragon, Split Enz (and, of course, Neil and Tim Finn as a result of that), Max Merritt, Kevin Borach, Mi-Sex (who I adored) - it's really bugs us. (NT) -- Kim, 31/08/08 10:13

Virginities you wish you could regain.	Jeanne	26/08/08 10:40
Ah, what an interesting question! Hmmm, I'm going to have to have a serious think about this, Jeanne! (NT) -- Kim, 26/08/08 13:57 I wish ... -- the Chronicler, 27/08/08 5:14 Having thought about it.... -- Kim, 27/08/08 13:35 I'd like to read Sherlock Holmes for the first time (NT) -- D., 27/08/08 16:47 My mom and I had a very tenuous relationship all the years of our lives -- Barbara, 28/08/08 4:30 Isn't it amazing, Baboo, how many of our early memories are tied with "big event" movies or Disney films as a tiny child? (NT) -- Bill T., 28/08/08 5:41 What in the hell are "kitten heels". Anything like Ann-Margret wears in "Kitten with a Whip"? (NT) -- Bill "Fawk-Me Pumps" T., 28/08/08 5:40 I went off looking for a picture of kitten heel shoes and disappeared off to a happy place for a loooong time. They're like this, Billy.... -- Kim, 28/08/08 11:39 Oh, okay. I've seen them around. Always seeing women on escalators getting the stiletto of the Kitten Heel caught in the gratings.... -- Bill T., 29/08/08 4:25 Yes, they aren't without their hazards. I used to find walking through Covent Garden (with those cobbled streets) a bit of a bugger. And if I stand on grass I sink in. But they're so cute! I don't get 6 inch heels - sure they have their place, but they're too bleedin' uncomfortable for everyday wear. BTW where do you find a boot to fit a 110kg leg? (NT) -- Kim, 29/08/08 10:23 Nordstrom....the flagship store in Seattle is like a boot fetishists dream every Autumn. I think half the guys in there during the Half Yearly Shoe Sale each Fall is playing pocket pool with his own cue as he watches women try on shoes and boots...... -- Bill T., 30/08/08 4:15 Sounds like Heaven! (NT) -- Kim, 30/08/08 9:57 Snap out of it, Chron. Love is over-rated, except the type (spirtually platonic) that we share here! (NT) -- Bill "So There" T., 28/08/08 5:39 I believe 'scared' isn't the word. ...I trust no one (apprehensive-?), yet. -But I will. (NT) -- the Chronicler, 29/08/08 5:18 Not Very Original on my Part, but.... -- Bill T., 28/08/08 5:37

Popcorn is "the most profitable substance on the planet, more than heroin, more than plutonium." Link....	Orville Reddenbacher	11/08/08 6:55
I wish they'd ban noisy snack here. Popcorn itself is okay, but it's the gits who insist on sucking on their fingers and making smacking noises after EVERY handful that make me mental! That and the people who are incapable of following the most rudimentary plot line. Ugh! (NT) -- Kim, 28/08/08 1:43 I LOOOOVE popcorn! And I love licking my fingers and smacking my lips and savoring every kernal. -- Barbara, 28/08/08 4:35 .....and REAL BUTTER ON THE POPCORN, PLEASE! (NT) -- Bill "It's better with butter" T., 28/08/08 5:30 Oh Barb! We can still go to the movies together. I'll just be wearing a set of those headphones that Lancaster pilots used to wear to block out the sound of four Rolls Royce engines and we'll be fine! (NT) -- Kim, 28/08/08 11:09 Movie/Cinema Faux Pas -- Bill T., 28/08/08 5:29 I think the demise of the drive-in has a lot to do with that behaviour. Long gone are the days when you could pile 5 people into a car, buy fish and chips on the way and then make as much rucus as you like because it's what you do at the drive-in. There's only one left in Brisbane now, which makes me a bit sad. Especially as it's nowhere near a Chip Shop. (NT) -- Kim, 28/08/08 11:13 Seattle Area Drive-In Movies -- Bill T., 29/08/08 4:33 Check this site out. Drive-in's in the USA. -- Teller, 29/08/08 7:32 Thanks, Teller. Remember all those food ads at the drive-ins? And the insane things like rain visors and heaters for your car? (NT) -- Bill T., 29/08/08 9:56 With the dancing drink, the strutting candy bar and the pompous popcorn. Hell Yeah. -- Teller, 29/08/08 10:15 I remember all the copies of the food ads at drive-ins being all faded to pink and making the insipid food look even more toxic than it was. "Let's all go to the lobby, and get ourselves a treat!" (NT) -- Bill "Jordan Almonds" T., 30/08/08 4:17 Wow, The Rodeo is still open! And a triple-screener now, too. (NT) -- Bill T., 29/08/08 10:07

Girl, 12, 'driving drunk in stolen car'	Australia	29/08/08 10:29
Yes, they do that sort of thing quite a lot in Darwin. It's wilder than the wild west up there. (NT) -- Kim, 29/08/08 10:36 Kim, my late father was in Darwin quite a few times during WWII where the would get a bit of R&R after taking oil in convoys from Aruba and Curacao to New Guinea and the Solomon Islands.... -- Bill T., 30/08/08 4:08

Robbie Burns fans mull over Michael Jackson link	Dear Lord!	28/08/08 23:42
Oh, this is just so not right. My Scots grannie is spinning in her grave in North Seattle right now over this. (NT) -- Bill T., 29/08/08 9:59 I wouldn't recommend he tours some of the rougher parts of Scotland (ie most of it) if he plans on releasing that. (NT) -- Kim, 29/08/08 21:37

What a Find!!!!!	Bill T.	26/08/08 7:24
Finders Keepers. I bet they are a blast. (NT) -- Teller, 26/08/08 8:39 Those fridge cupboards must have weight 200 kg! Where would you find a wall to support that kind of a load?? Oh and BTW, I have those pearls and was wearing them only yesterday. (NT) -- Kim, 26/08/08 9:22 I imagine the amount of power needed to cool things in that Wall Refrigerator-Freezer with all the doors open like in the ad would cause a New England power brown-out again. I wonder, from the far away gaze she has, how much Miltown or Seconal she is on? (NT) -- Bill T., 28/08/08 5:53 Oh, Teller, you know they are a blast! -- Bill T., 28/08/08 10:05 Ah yes - 'the space age' in 50s advertising! It was all those Mercury astronauts setting them off! (NT) -- Kim, 28/08/08 11:03 Well, we had color TV, cars with fins, drive-in movies and burgers, but they got Urosha the Monkey in space before we got John Glenn there. -- Bill T., 29/08/08 10:02 Now that you mention it...... (NT) -- Kim, 29/08/08 10:37

Hey, Tomatoheads! They're celebrating us in Spain.	Jeanne, forget Seattle - THIS is where we should hold Ralphfest	28/08/08 6:04
Apparently, living in the EU they feel free to throw food around -- Bill T., 28/08/08 9:44 This always makes me sooooooo uncomfortable. Why not ship the excess off to a third world country that could eat them. I also don't like the Spanish record on animal rights and Antionio Banderas sucks. So, all in all you can count me out of a Spanish Ralphfest. (NT) -- Kim, 28/08/08 11:24

WAH! WAH! WAH! Where the FAWK is everyone?	Bill "I Came to Play and No One Was in the Playground" T.	17/08/08 9:49
P.S. I am feeling very rejected today. I've been rejected for some reason by three heretofore very nice and sociable people that I used to share conversations, snacks and magazines with at the shelter. I've got tough skin, but it hurts when the only people you can communicate with intelligently and in a civil manner snub you in every manner possible. Oh, well, fuck them. (NT) -- Bill "Tough as Helen Lawson in VOOD" T., 17/08/08 9:53 I'm here, Bill! Were they rude or just sort of I-have -things-on-my-mind sullen? (NT) -- Kim, 17/08/08 10:12 Ah Bill, that's too bad. But I'm sure it's not you - they're probably just resentful because you're getting out of there. (NT) -- Jeanne, 18/08/08 7:07 I found out what was going on........... -- Bill T., 18/08/08 10:56 Well, I'm glad it was a misunderstanding. Pity two of them went 'lovey-dovey' on the trip. I hate when people do that - it's soooo uncomfortable. Can they not contain their raging hormones for an hour or so? (NT) -- Kim, 19/08/08 9:48 If it's any consolation, I'm frozen here in Sunny Queensland. This has been the longest, coldest winter I have endured in decades! And the whole city is inert because.... -- Kim, 17/08/08 10:20 I found a fur coat when I was cleaning out my clothes closet today. You want me to send it to you? (NT) -- Jeanne, 18/08/08 7:09 I've needed it this winter - and it's STILL cold. I may have to go live up north! (NT) -- Kim, 18/08/08 13:23 The Ensuing Cold in Seattle -- Bill T., 28/08/08 10:00 I'm here. -- Teller, 17/08/08 10:36 I'm here now. Bad computer infection, working on it most of the day -- Kathy, 17/08/08 14:38 Have you tried a neti pot, Kathy? People I know who have sinus trouble swear by them. (NT) -- Jeanne, 18/08/08 7:42 They are good. I bit of an odd sensation at first, but they're terrific for a flush out. You can also get saline nasal pump sprays which are great as an on-the-go neti pot. Great for a 'freshen-up' when in a stuffy environment. (NT) -- Kim, 18/08/08 9:14 What the hell is a "neti pot"? It's either an ancient type of Egyptian marijuana or the name of an English nanny who's a bit off her game. (NT) -- Bill T., 28/08/08 10:02 It's a small ceramic pot with a spout you stick up your nose. You put warm, salty water in it and wash out your sinuses. Sounds disgusting but it's blessed relief if you have blocked sinuses. (NT) -- Kim, 28/08/08 11:05 I went to the beach on Kelley's Island, camped, rode my bike around and watched Lake Erie from a beach for 4 days. I just made stuffed peppers and peach crisp from produce I bought at Bergmans farm market up there, you been? I'd love it if you'd come to supper (NT) -- Another Karen, 19/08/08 8:59 AK, take me with you on vacation next year! I love camping and biking! (NT) -- Bill T., 22/08/08 3:49 I moved two weeks ago and won't have internet access for another week and a half or so. I have to go to the public library, which I don't get to do often because I work too much. (NT) -- Micki...this sux!, 21/08/08 11:12 Micki.....I've missed you. Isn't it the shits that...... -- Bill T., 22/08/08 3:52 That's very odd that you have to wait. All you do here is ring up, get your phone number, tell them the date you're in and away you go. I'd have the shits, too! (NT) -- Kim, 22/08/08 11:23 Some guy has to climb the pole and reconnect it at 25 feet in the air, and I have to wait till this Saturday because I have to be here when they arrive, and they need a two hour window and I can't afford to take time off work to wait around for him on a weekday. -- Micki, 26/08/08 9:04 He has to climb up a pole to do what? Aren't all telephone exchanges controlled by computers these day? At least they're throwing in cable tv. Love the idea of a PLUM sofa - faboo! (NT) -- Kim, 26/08/08 9:17 He has to climb the pole because that's where they reconnect the cable that brings the internet into my home. It's 25 feet in the air so I don't go out and reconnect it myself, as some people are prone to do. God, I hate Comcast, but they're the only game in town. -- Micki, 28/08/08 8:23 Craig's List -- Bill T., 28/08/08 6:01

New Meds for Billy	Billy T.	21/08/08 10:46
Only one..... -- Kim, 21/08/08 12:32 My meds -- Kathy, 22/08/08 0:49 Kathy re: Lexapro -- Bill T., 22/08/08 3:47 Oh, so, Kim, you have Graves' Disease? (NT) -- Bill T., 22/08/08 3:38 No - just a dud thyroid. (NT) -- Kim, 22/08/08 11:20 My meds: -- Micki, 26/08/08 9:26 Oh, Micki! -- Bill "Meds Be Us" T., 28/08/08 5:49

Billy's Health News	Bill T.	23/08/08 3:34
Good. Best wishes for even more good news. -- Teller, 23/08/08 8:06 Thanks, Teller. I walk or take the bus everywhere..... -- Bill T., 23/08/08 9:57 You need to get a swanky outfit so you can cut a dashing figure striding about Seattle. I suggest a monocle - it's about time they came back. Congrats on the good news - it's wonderful! (NT) -- Kim, 23/08/08 10:10 I got $150.00 in vouchers for a .................... -- Bill T., 23/08/08 10:30 Perhaps a pipe? (NT) -- Kim, 23/08/08 22:05 .....yeah, right, and then I'll get a Corgi and a "best gel" named Snickie, turn myself into black and white and everytime I enter a room the theme from British Gaumont or British Eagle Lion will play.....it could happen. (NT) -- Bill "That's a Bit of a Stick Wicket Isn't It, Puss Cat" T., 24/08/08 3:51 A pipe? Heavens, how non-u. One shudders. No, a cigarette holder. Ivory, inlaid with silver. (NT) -- Nancy Mitford, 26/08/08 12:42 One word, Billy: spats. (NT) -- Jeanne, 24/08/08 6:45 And a nice ascot for that smoking jacket. (NT) -- Teller, 24/08/08 8:12 While you're at it, adopt a Ronald Colman accent. (NT) -- Jeanne, 24/08/08 9:35 ... which means that from now on you must pronounce the name of this board as Rafe TomAHto. (NT) -- Jeanne, 24/08/08 9:37 That's how I pronounce it now. I suppose you American chaps pronounce it to-may-to? Savages! But I love the fashion tips - very happening. All Bill needs is a Burbery hat, a basset hound and he'd be a proper English gentleman (the last said in the accent of Victor Buono's mum in Whatever Happened to Baby Jane). (NT) -- Kim, 24/08/08 11:14 I am really enjoying this! -- Bill T., 25/08/08 5:33 I don't think a tart outfit is really me. I want designer chic, pointy-toed kitten heels and a long cigarette holder. Something late 50s/early 60s. (NT) -- Kim, 25/08/08 13:33 Richard Todd is on colour TV and here's my pick for your new "at home" outfit (see inside). -- Bill "Big Color" T., 26/08/08 7:36 Sorry the picture isn't showing up. Can you have another go? (NT) -- Kim, 26/08/08 9:24 here 'tis -- not Bill, 26/08/08 15:43 Who is "not Bill" and what wizardry did you use fo find this image out of the billions on the INternet? I'm scared! (NT) -- Bill "Shiver and Shaking" T., 28/08/08 5:45

For Kim and anyone else who loves 50's Brit movie idols: Dirl Bogarde's letters. Link...	Jeanne	10/08/08 23:43
I imagine Dickie Attenborough read through these with pursed lips! Old Father Attenboroughs Disney-Arnhem, indeed! (NT) -- Kim, 28/08/08 1:51

Confuse-a-Catd Ltd to go out of business: cats get Alzheimers...	Jeanne	10/08/08 23:56
For some reason, I've just spotted this. It's not surprising as cats are getting to such grand ages. I was reading about a 25 year old cat in a magazine (the owner was asking advice about her deafness - bless) so it's hardly surprising they can dement too. I feel a bit the same sometimes. (NT) -- Kim, 28/08/08 1:40

For those not already familiar with this highly addictive Web site.........	Bill T.	26/08/08 7:59
It's certainly one to enjoy on a wet afternoon with a hot cup of tea! (NT) -- Kim, 26/08/08 13:59

The cowboy hat. Okay, I recognize Bush. Who's the other guy? A country music singer? (NT)	Jeanne - We don't get much country music in Boston. A pity.	25/08/08 10:37
That's Bono, dear girl. (NT) -- Kim, 25/08/08 13:41 Sorry as a geazer, I have to say "That's Sonny Bono?" Looks more like Ringo Starr. -- Teller, 26/08/08 9:16 Yes! And I feel bad for saying that because he fronts the most successful rock band in the world and seems to do so much work for humanitarian purposed. But there's no denying that, for inexplicable some reason, the guy's a totall willy. (NT) -- Kim, 26/08/08 9:19

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