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Date Posted: 07:12:15 08/21/06 Mon
Author: Green Dragon
Subject: Groaner...

The hospital chief is showing the Health Minister round a new hospital of which he is very proud.

The Minister is taken round all the wards - surgical, cardiac, orthopaedic etc.

They come to the last ward on the round, for which the Minister is grateful, feeling ready for the slap-up lunch and drinks the hospital are giving him.

There are three beds in this ward, and the Minister goes up to the first and says, “And how are you today?” “Wee sleekit cow’rin’ tim’rous beastie, O what a panic’s in thy breastie…”

‘Eh?” thinks the Minister, but goes on to the next bed, keeping lunch in mind.

“And what’s wrong with you, my dear chap?” he says. “Scots wha hae wi’ Wallace bled, Scots wham Bruce has often led…” bawls the patient.

“Oh, Christ” thinks the Minister, “still only one more to go till lunch.”

To the third and last patient he says, forcing a smile, “Are you feeling better now?” “Oh, my luve is like a red red rose, Which newly sprung in June…” moans the patient.

The Minister turns to the hospital chief and says quietly, “Is this the psychiatric ward?”

“Oh no,” says the chief, “this is the serious Burns unit.”

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