In honour of my SIL who had her first mammogram - the first of us to do it! -- Joke Board

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Date Posted: 03:32:29 05/29/06 Mon
Author:

Sheila
Subject: In honour of my SIL who had her first mammogram - the first of us to do it!

Many women are afraid of their first mammogram, but there's no need to worry. By taking a few minutes each day for a week preceding the exam, and doing the following practice exercises, you will be totally prepared. And you can do this right in your own home!

Exercise 1:
Open your refrigerator door and insert one breast between the door and themain box. Have one of your strongest friends slam the door shut and lean on the door for good measure. Hold that position for five seconds (while you hold your breath). Repeat again, in case the first time wasn't effective enough.

Exercise 2:

Visit your garage at 3 am when the temperature of the cement floor is just perfect. Take off your clothes and lie comfortably on the floor with one breast wedged under the rear tire of the car. Ask a friend to slowly back he car up until your breast is sufficiently flattened and chilled. Turn over and repeat for the other breast.

Exercise 3:

Freeze two metal bookends overnight. Strip to the waist. Invite a stranger into the room. Press the bookends against one of your breasts. Smash the bookends together as hard as you can. Set an appointment with the stranger to meet next week and do it again!!

CONGRATULATIONS!

Now you have nothing at all to worry about when you go for your Mammogram!

And just a thought for all you women out there MENtal illness, MENstrual cramps, MENtal breakdown, MENopause. Ever notice how all of women's problems start with men? And when we have real problems,it's HISterectomy!

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Replies:

HAHAHA - i love these. i also love the cartoon i got called "The MAN-o-gram" showing a man with his parts being maltreated in the same way breasts are during a mammogram. turn about is fair play! (NT) -- annieo, 06:40:11 05/29/06 Mon
Hahaha....just got an email with a mamo poem...is it mamo awareness month hehehe come inside >>>>>>> -- Marilyn, 07:41:24 05/29/06 Mon
when i first started reading I thought it was a serious thing! I was horrified at the thought! lol. that was too funny! (NT) -- AmandaJ, 08:57:54 05/29/06 Mon

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