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Date Posted: 04:05:09 07/01/09 Wed
Author: Larnsturt
Subject: Whoo hoo! Looky at us! We be writing machines!



I am so proud of you guys, rising to the challenge so well! I know the road is tough and time is short, but we have so much going for us. We have the knowledge, the skill, and the desire. We can do it!

Just so you know, I'm still going to post homeworks but they are merely starting points, not requirements. If you have something to go along with it, or are inspired, please share! But if you would like to post something, hell, anything, you feel free. Free as a bird.

So let's get to said activities!


1. SPF 60, My Ass. Your character is stuck out in the sun. It could be the hot and sweltering sun of a desert or the blinding glare of sun on snow. It could be the sun through clouds that actually burns faster than open sun and your freaking suntan lotion doesn't work and now you've got stupid tan lines from the weird costume you were wearing at the time. Stupid old suntan lotion.

2. "Line, Please!" Use the following to illustrate the futility of man against the Decpticons.

"Down there in the dark, I could see the real truth about you."
"I hope you lie and tell everyone I was a good wife."
"It ended as badly as you might imagine, in a cavalcade of anger and fear."


We can do it, guys. We can so totally lick this thing.



I leave you, in the grand tradition, with:

WORDS OF REALLY HORRIBLE QUOTES FROM TRANSFORMERS THAT SHOULD PLEASE YOU BE CAUSE YOU DIDN'T WRITE THEM!


"He's right. If we stay here, we're screwed with Megatron in the other hanger. Mission City is 22 miles away. We're going to sneak that Cube out of here and hide it somewhere in the city. " - Captian Lennox

That way, when the evil robots come, they can kill more people. Screw going into the desert where no one could get hurt from the GIANT EVIL ROBOTS trying to destroy us. Let's go to a highly populated area!

"I just wanted to show him my cannons." - Ironhide

"Those are my dog's pain pills." - Sam

"We cannot let the humans pay for our mistakes. It's been an honor serving with you all. Autobots, roll out!" - Optimus Prime



...no more late night movies for me.

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[> Sun and weird costumes>>> -- susiej, 15:55:10 07/01/09 Wed

I always hated this damn car. And costume parties. Why can't grown adults simply sip beverages and have witty conversation? Why do we need to wear idiot costumes to party? And when did I become a grumpy middle-aged woman?

It comes with the hangover, I suppose. And the car overheating, again. And the big bottle of antifreeze I carry in the trunk being empty on account of driving out to that party last night and not remembering, when I woke up in the pool house with a hammer banging inside my head and the arm of some guy I didn't know thrown across my bare stomach, that I'd used all the antifreeze.

So here I am walking down the highway in a Jedi robe. The hood is nice for hiding beneath, but it does add signifigantly to the sweltering heat.

As I stumble along through the weeds, I hear a car slowing behind me. I don't even turn. What kind of a wierdo would pick up a Jedi at 8 a.m. on a country road?

"So my young padawan, it seems you are in need of a lift back to Courisant," says a deep, delicious male voice from the truck moving very slowly alongside me.

I still don't look up. Better to savor a fantasy for later then to to be axed murdered by a delicious voiced stranger.

"Seriously," says the voice, "you're going to pass out from heat exhaustion or dehydration from the hangover you must have."

I turned. "How can you tell I have a hangover?"

"I was at the party too."

I stare into the soulful gray eyes. No way, I would have remembered him.

As if he could read my mind, he reached over on the seat and held up a Batman costume. "I was hiding too. Behind a mask."

I did remember Batman or at least the body that filled out the costume without need of padded abs and chest. "But, you where with Scarlett."

"Yes. She invited me. I had run out of excuses. I tried all night to get over to introduce myself to you especially after you, Yoda, and Dumbledore threw off your robes and took a dip in the pool, but her crinolines were always in the way."

"Yea, and the silicone leaping out of her bodice."

"That too."

"And the circle of men admiring them."

"Seems some guys get turned on by cantelopes with nipples."

Headache or not, I laughed aloud.

"Come on," he said. "I'm not an axe murderer. I live nearby. Just let me take you to the corner store up the road. You can get a Gatorade, a coffee, whatever, and some more antifreeze. If I do anything funny, you can always hit me with your light saber."

Suddenly, I didn't hate my car so much or the Jedi Costume.

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[> [> LOL, this is great! -- Debi, 17:06:49 07/01/09 Wed

This was great, seriously. And who hasn't been in a similar situation, though rarely with such a lovely outcome. Hooray for Batman!

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[> [> [> thanks Debi. I really did own a car like that. On long car rides home I'd have to roll down all the windows and turn the heat on so it would blow off the engine and then, one day it just died- oozing green fluid all over the service shop. -- susiej, 20:05:09 07/01/09 Wed

>This was great, seriously. And who hasn't been in a
>similar situation, though rarely with such a lovely
>outcome. Hooray for Batman!

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[> [> Oh, absolutely brilliant! >>>> -- Page, 20:35:21 07/01/09 Wed


>So here I am walking down the highway in a Jedi robe.

That's one of the best lines I've ever read. I literally laughed out loud. Kicked my feet against the ottoman, too!

What a wonderful story! Interesting from beginning to end, and a hunky guy with soulful grey eyes. Thank you so much for posting this!

Hugs,
Page

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[> [> Ha! I like! -- Larn, 01:41:50 07/02/09 Thu

I really, really do feel the character's pain. I once had to go into Target in full renaissance costume, in July, to pick up tampons of all things.


....that friend still totally owes me, too.

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[> [> Hey Susie! This is awesome! >>> -- Esther, 10:32:19 07/02/09 Thu

I loved the bang on observations, stated with such frankness. Just one question. Whose arm was that and was he bare too? *G* Changed my mind. Two questions. How did Batman know Jedi's car needed antifreeze??? Did the steam escaping from under the hood give it away?

Great scene. And since I'm of the very conservative nature, I'm going to have to live vacariously through this. So thanks for sharing!

Hugs

Esther

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[> [> [> I'm not sure, but i'm thinking the arm must have belonged to Yoda or Dumbledore- that part's fuzzy. And yea, the hood up, the steam, the empty antifreeze bottle thrown in disgust- those were Batman's clues. -- susiej, 16:37:51 07/06/09 Mon


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[> Sun and parades -- Debi, 16:31:44 07/03/09 Fri

A new character for me, a new story. This is hardly more than a drabble though. In honor of the Fourth of July holiday.

Sunlight reflected off the surface of the water, sparkling like little gems. Bright, brilliant, blinding little gems. Molly swore again, leaning over the side to peer at the sunglasses sinking to the sandy bottom. It wasn’t that she didn’t want to go after them; she wished they were on her face, soothing her eyes with their shade. But the boat was already under way, and there was the matter of her clothes. Why had she let herself get talked into participating in this idiot parade?

The Fourth of July in a military town was a Big Deal. Airshows, barbecues, ceremonies; why couldn’t she have been invited to participate in one of those? She’d have even volunteered to bring the beer. There are some perks to owning a bar. But here she was, dressed in a Betsy Ross outfit, complete with underskirt and bloomers, on Ed Wilson’s party barge in the middle of the St. John’s River. The historical authenticity of the costume was suspect; Molly was reasonably sure that Betsy Ross’s everyday ensemble was not a décolletage-exposing off-the-shoulder dress. She looked like an escapee from a patriotic Renaissance Faire.

Speaking of exposed personal parts, the sun was baking the hell out of hers. With a frown of frustration, she looked toward the back of the boat. Ed was steering with a beer in his free hand. His bald pate bore a similar lobstery tone to her cleavage since his tricorne hat was lying on the deck between his feet. Despite the choppy river, the boat bucking through the waves, he never spilled a drop of beer.

“Ed!”

“Yeah?”

“You didn’t tell me I was going to be roasted alive. Where’s the sunscreen?”

Ed tossed back the rest of his beer and laughed, dropping the empty into the live well standing open behind him. “Sunscreen is for wimps!”

“Asshole.”

This only made Ed laugh harder. “C’mon Moll; we’ll have fun. Beetle and Edith are coming in their boat and we’re picking up Phil, Wendy, Terry and… well, lots of people are coming.”

“That’s all very nice, Ed, but my tits are frying. Where the hell is the parade anyway?”

“Along the riverfront, going past the Landing. We’ll get out there to watch the fireworks.”

“Got news for you, Ed. The second this parade crap is over, I’m losing this stupid costume and putting my jeans back on.”

“Jeans, in this heat? Girl, you’re crazy.”

Molly stared at him, wishing for a musket right about now.

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[> [> Debi>>> -- susiej, 16:39:44 07/03/09 Fri

Beetle and Edith? That sounds like an interesting pair and sounds like you've got a good start to a new project. Loved the "frying tits."

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[> [> [> That was quick Susiej! -- Debi, 16:49:12 07/03/09 Fri

>Beetle and Edith? That sounds like an interesting pair
>and sounds like you've got a good start to a new
>project. Loved the "frying tits."

Names of friends and parents of friends from childhood. The setting is very similar to the are where I grew up, so the names just came. I may make this story my NaNo project for this year. She's a character I've had poking at the back of my brain for years, maybe it's time she had a chance.
Thanks, Susie! Molly's pretty blunt. Gotta be if you own a bar in a Navy town.

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[> [> Loved how Ed didn't waste a drop of that beer! >>>> -- Page, 16:47:05 07/04/09 Sat

Your descriptions of the sun on the water (especially clarifying that the "little gems" were "Bright, brilliant, blinding little gems"), and the discomfort of incipient sunburn were great!

And thank you for the comments on Betsy Ross' clothing! Ever since I was in fifth grade, I've been rather irritated at the depictions of Betsy wearing what had to be a ballgown while sitting there, calmly stitching on the flag. I think that might have been the year I got my first subscription to Vogue, still a mainstay in my mailbox. *G*

Hugs,
Page

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[> [> [> Ed is a typical local redneck ;-) -- Debi, 19:42:10 07/04/09 Sat

>Your descriptions of the sun on the water (especially
>clarifying that the "little gems" were "Bright,
>brilliant, blinding little gems"), and the discomfort
>of incipient sunburn were great!

Thank you! Sunglasses on the water in the bright sunlight are a must. Otherwise the second you go inside anywhere you're alomst blind for ages. And usually have a screaming headache.
>
>And thank you for the comments on Betsy Ross'
>clothing! Ever since I was in fifth grade, I've been
>rather irritated at the depictions of Betsy wearing
>what had to be a ballgown while sitting there, calmly
>stitching on the flag. I think that might have been
>the year I got my first subscription to Vogue, still a
>mainstay in my mailbox. *G*

LOL... I'm pretty sure, as a respectable married woman, Betsy Ross did not have her *ahem*s hanging out. Molly's going to have one hellacious sunburn on parts that rarely see the light of day. I had a sunburn in a similar area once. The only spot i missed with the sunblock was a patch the size of my palm in the center of my chest. I was on a casino cruise thingy (for furture reference, if gambling isn't your thing, these are boring as hell. I'm just saying) and was wearing a sundress and spending time on the deck watching the dolphins swimming alongside the boat. The rest of me was unscathed; the patch on my chest was blistered. There's not enough Solarcaine in the world to make that feel better.

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[> [> [> [> Esther might be able to shed some "light" on this.... >>>> -- Page, 15:27:04 07/05/09 Sun

....having a backyard pool. But when we had our very own inground pool, there would be weekends when our children were off visiting relatives, and I would eschew the whole swimsuit thing. I only forgot the super-strong sunblock once. It was a painful lesson, but one I never forgot! *G*

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[> [> [> [> [> LOL Well, I'd love to shed whatever 'light' on whatever this is, but I have to leave for an appointment, and so will be back later to continue my climb up the board. -- Esther, 14:51:18 07/06/09 Mon


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[> [> I love new characters! >>> -- Esther, 11:54:23 07/09/09 Thu

A new character for me, a new story. This is hardly more than a drabble though. In honor of the Fourth of July holiday.

Sunlight reflected off the surface of the water, sparkling like little gems. Bright, brilliant, blinding little gems. Molly swore again, leaning over the side to peer at the sunglasses sinking to the sandy bottom. It wasn’t that she didn’t want to go after them; she wished they were on her face, soothing her eyes with their shade. But the boat was already under way, and there was the matter of her clothes. Why had she let herself get talked into participating in this idiot parade?
Her poor eyes! I have a headache just imagining what she’s going through. Those little gems are blinding!

The Fourth of July in a military town was a Big Deal. Airshows, barbecues, ceremonies; why couldn’t she have been invited to participate in one of those? She’d have even volunteered to bring the beer. There are some perks to owning a bar. But here she was, dressed in a Betsy Ross outfit, complete with underskirt and bloomers, on Ed Wilson’s party barge in the middle of the St. John’s River. The historical authenticity of the costume was suspect; Molly was reasonably sure that Betsy Ross’s everyday ensemble was not a décolletage-exposing off-the-shoulder dress. She looked like an escapee from a patriotic Renaissance Faire.
LOL Okay, this ensemble that was a décolletage-exposing off-the-shoulder dress suitable for a Renaissance Faire, leads me to believe that her assets are of the ample variety.

Speaking of exposed personal parts, the sun was baking the hell out of hers. With a frown of frustration, she looked toward the back of the boat. Ed was steering with a beer in his free hand. His bald pate bore a similar lobstery tone to her cleavage since his tricorne hat was lying on the deck between his feet. Despite the choppy river, the boat bucking through the waves, he never spilled a drop of beer.
Cleavage reinforces that opinion
Steering with a beer in his free hand s/b With a beer in his free hand, Ed was steering(ed) or something otherwise it’s the beer that is steering. Or so is my interpretation. And just for the record I got the image you were shooting for cause the DH is capable of doing the same. ;-)

“Ed!”

“Yeah?”

“You didn’t tell me I was going to be roasted alive. Where’s the sunscreen?”

Ed tossed back the rest of his beer and laughed, dropping the empty into the live well standing open behind him. “Sunscreen is for wimps!”

“Asshole.”

This only made Ed laugh harder. “C’mon Moll; we’ll have fun. Beetle and Edith are coming in their boat and we’re picking up Phil, Wendy, Terry and… well, lots of people are coming.”

“That’s all very nice, Ed, but my tits are frying. Where the hell is the parade anyway?”
LOL Frying tits. *G* Okay, back to my earlier ramblings about the exposed cleavage. Frying tits compared to exposed tata’s make me think of fried eggs (don’t ask me why it just does) and then my impression is of more flat-chested Renaissance goddess with the front of her dress too big. Not that it matters, but just thought I’d let you know my impression. *G*

“Along the riverfront, going past the Landing. We’ll get out there to watch the fireworks.”

“Got news for you, Ed. The second this parade crap is over, I’m losing this stupid costume and putting my jeans back on.”

So what’s she going to wear on top???? :-P

“Jeans, in this heat? Girl, you’re crazy.”

Molly stared at him, wishing for a musket right about now.
Awww Very cool Debi. And Molly seems to have her own sense of humor and speaks her mind. Very refreshing. Thanks for sharing!

Oh and just for the record, my ‘light’ will tell you this -the sun isn’t powerful enough for me to get a sunburn in the 10 minutes I can actually handle staying in the pool (temp is a warm 70/21 degrees on average, which is warm cause we think it’s a nice summer day when the temperature itself is 70/21 degrees). I know the reflection off the water is wicked and had a sunburn on the one trip we made when we were kids to Michigan when we played in the inground pool of the relatives we were visiting. But here? Nope. Not an issue. Even if I don’t mention all the trees blocking the sun. *G* What I do get is a headache from squinting. I really am more of a night person. *G*

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[> [> [> Thanks Esther -- Debi, 06:32:12 07/10/09 Fri

>LOL Okay, this ensemble that was a
>décolletage-exposing off-the-shoulder dress suitable
>for a Renaissance Faire, leads me to believe that her
>assets are of the ample variety.

She's...well-built, or as they say here in my Neck of the Woods, she's been blessed.;-)
>
>Cleavage reinforces that opinion
>Steering with a beer in his free hand s/b With a beer
>in his free hand, Ed was steering(ed) or something
>otherwise it’s the beer that is steering. Or so is my
>interpretation. And just for the record I got the
>image you were shooting for cause the DH is capable of
>doing the same. ;-)

Duly noted. I'll reword in some fashion.
>
>“Ed!”
>
>“Yeah?”
>
>“You didn’t tell me I was going to be roasted alive.
>Where’s the sunscreen?”
>
>Ed tossed back the rest of his beer and laughed,
>dropping the empty into the live well standing open
>behind him. “Sunscreen is for wimps!”
>
>“Asshole.”
>
>This only made Ed laugh harder. “C’mon Moll; we’ll
>have fun. Beetle and Edith are coming in their boat
>and we’re picking up Phil, Wendy, Terry and… well,
>lots of people are coming.”
>
>“That’s all very nice, Ed, but my tits are frying.
>Where the hell is the parade anyway?”
>LOL Frying tits. *G* Okay, back to my earlier
>ramblings about the exposed cleavage. Frying tits
>compared to exposed tata’s make me think of fried eggs
>(don’t ask me why it just does) and then my impression
>is of more flat-chested Renaissance goddess with the
>front of her dress too big. Not that it matters, but
>just thought I’d let you know my impression. *G*

LOL... I got a food-related image too, but now the eggs are stuck in there... thanks;-)
>
>“Along the riverfront, going past the Landing. We’ll
>get out there to watch the fireworks.”
>
>“Got news for you, Ed. The second this parade crap is
>over, I’m losing this stupid costume and putting my
>jeans back on.”
>
>So what’s she going to wear on top???? :-P

Maybe that's the catch...*VBG* Nah, molly would wear soemthing, but Ed might run with that statment. Thanks for the idea...
>
>“Jeans, in this heat? Girl, you’re crazy.”
>
>Molly stared at him, wishing for a musket right about
>now.
>Awww Very cool Debi. And Molly seems to have her
>own sense of humor and speaks her mind. Very
>refreshing. Thanks for sharing!
>
>Oh and just for the record, my ‘light’ will tell you
>this -the sun isn’t powerful enough for me to get a
>sunburn in the 10 minutes I can actually handle
>staying in the pool (temp is a warm 70/21 degrees on
>average, which is warm cause we think it’s a nice
>summer day when the temperature itself is 70/21
>degrees). I know the reflection off the water is
>wicked and had a sunburn on the one trip we made when
>we were kids to Michigan when we played in the
>inground pool of the relatives we were visiting. But
>here? Nope. Not an issue. Even if I don’t mention
>all the trees blocking the sun. *G* What I do get is
>a headache from squinting. I really am more of a
>night person. *G*

Here in the intense Florida sun, I have watched my own skin burn. Really.

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