Date Posted:21:23:22 10/07/09 Wed Author:Page Subject: Is liking Adam a good thing, or a bad thing? *G* >>>> In reply to:
susiej
's message, "Awww!>>>>" on 14:33:10 10/07/09 Wed
>OK- that really makes me like Adam way too much.
LOL! Even though Adam's the bad guy in this, trying to ruin Scarlett and Rhett's happiness, he's still a good guy at heart. I wanted the reader to remember that he was a victim, too, and not the evil ex. *G* I hope I've succeeded.
>
>Really good feel for the place- the heat, the sun etc.
>But I have to agree with you that's its a little rough
>in places and that made me loose focus.
>
>Ex. "on the polished strips of wood of the living room
>floor"- that was a mouthful and I stumbled on the
>second of. I think- "polished wood of the living room
>floor" would flow better and still get the idea
>across. As I said, I could really see that part.
>
>
>Again, when she and Adam started talking, I wanted to
>hear the heck what they were saying!So, some of the
>details got distracting.
You should've seen it the night I wrote it. *G* It was one of those that I wanted to write while I could hear them, but it was all dialogue. I went back and added the details the next morning on very little sleep. Can you give me an idea of where I went overboard? I'd really like your insight on that.
>
>Great scene! It will be very shiny when polished.
I have a hard time with that in my own work because I can see them talking so I forget that others don't see what's in my head. And I just like conversation. But I've been critted for leaving out too much.
But I find when I read now, I get distracted more and more by the tags. I almost started with a pencil so I could scratch out the "he said" and "she reached for her glass" or whatever. I guess I've become an impatient reader.