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Date Posted: 05/ 3/11 8:43am
Author: Cindy
Subject: Trying Times

Those of you that have been here a while know that I've been caring for my Mother. She was diagnosed with mini stroke dementia back in 1996. Well it appears the end is near. She is no longer able to swallow safely anymore. She has aspiration pneumonia and it's highly doubtful she'll ever be able "eat" normally again. We've been advised that it's probably best to let her go. Of course we didn't want to hear that, but as things have transpired we now know she's on her way out.

It's tearing me up inside. I've been caring for her since the beginning of her illness and while I'm so very glad she's at home surrounded by her family, it's gonna be tremendously hard to watch her die. We have Hospice help and it's comforting to know we aren't alone and Mom will be comfortable in her last days. I know we are doing the right thing but I keep hearing a line from Steel Magnolias that goes something like, I know that in my head, I just someone would explain it to my heart.

I know I'm not here much anymore, but would be much obliged if you'd keep us in your thoughts. It's going to be a VERY bumpy ride.

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Replies:

[> You and your family are in my thoughts, Cindy. It has been a very long and hard road for you all, I hope you all find some peace and comfort in letting your mom go with dignity. -- Amy, 05/ 3/11 9:01am

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[> I am so very sorry about your mother. God bless you for all of your love and care over these last years. You are absolutely doing the right thing, but that still doesn't make things any easier. You, your mom, and your family will be in my prayers. -- Cindy, 05/ 4/11 8:39am

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[> [> Thanks Amy and Cindy (for a minute there I thought I was talking to myself!) The Hospice people have been effin amazing. So grateful for their assistance. Hope all is well with you Amy ;) -- Cindy, 05/ 4/11 11:07am

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[> [> [> The second post was from me, but I don't know how it got signed Cindy?! -- Liz, 05/ 5/11 9:17am

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[> [> [> [> Thanks Liz! I had one of those HUH? moments.lol Wondered if it was a tech glitch. Anyway apprectiate your kindness muchly. -- Cindy, 05/ 5/11 9:42am

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[> I'm so sorry Cindy. My mom went out with metastatic colon cancer. Hospice was a godsend. I know you'll find the strength you need. My thoughts are with you and your family. -- kathryn_dc, 05/ 5/11 11:37am

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[> Thinking of you and your mom. Focus on the horizon. -- gumtree, 05/ 5/11 11:43am

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[> [> Many thanks Kathryn and gum. Mom is still resting comfortably. We've made arrangements to donate her body to science. I thought it would be a fitting legacy for her as she was a teacher in her professional life. She adored teaching and I think she would be so proud to know that she'll continue to teach even after she's gone. -- Cindy, 05/ 7/11 8:34am

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[> [> [> What a generous gesture, Cindy. My daughter is one of those people who benefitted from a body donated to science. She is a skilled and caring practitioner. That couldn't happen without family like yours. -- Liz, 05/ 8/11 1:41pm

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[> This Mother's Day must've been really hard...hope you did ok -- Amy, 05/ 9/11 8:55am

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[> [> Mom left us at 7:15 pm tonight. She went peacefully surrounded by her family. It just really hurts right now. RIP to the greatest Mom EVER! -- Cindy, 05/10/11 12:26am

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[> [> [> You poor woman. I feel for you Cindy. what a great gesture to donate. She will live on, in another way. -- Poule, 05/10/11 4:28am

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[> [> [> [> So very sorry, Cindy. You are all in my prayers. -- Liz, 05/10/11 9:29am

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[> My heart goes out to you and your family Cindy. HUGS -- Amy, 05/11/11 8:59am

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[> Sending you and your family lots of love and hugs - am thinking of you. -- MIMI, 05/11/11 11:21am

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[> Very sorry to hear about your Mom, Cindy. I hope you can find solace knowing she was loved and well-cared for. -- lyn, 05/11/11 12:18pm

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[> [> Much heartfelt thanks to you all. The next chapter in my life has begun. The pain lessens a bit every day. The good memories come flooding back. I locked them away while Mom's illness progressed because they were painful by comparison. Now I can let them back in and think of the many happys times. Thanks again to all for your kind words. HUGS -- Cindy, 05/12/11 11:25am

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[> [> [> What a great attitude. Your mom raised a wonderful daughter; I'm sure she was very proud. -- kathryn_dc, 05/19/11 10:55am

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[> So sorry... -- Green Eyed Lady, 05/17/11 1:51am

I't's so hard losing a parent. I' glad she was suurounded by a loving family.

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