| Subject: Traumatic Amnesia 157 |
Author:
Nikita507
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Date Posted: Friday, July 03, 07:47:13pm
In reply to:
Nikita507
's message, "Traumatic Amnesia 147+" on Friday, June 26, 03:26:09pm
Michael held up the coat and helped Nikita to step into it. He had first selected a full fur coat and given Nikita’s reaction to everything, he was glad that he had not done that. Instead, he got her a very tailored coat that only had the expensive fur around the neck line and at the cuffs of the sleeve. He eased Nikita into the coat and wrapped his arms around her while swaying still.
The ceremony was a bit more religious than Michael thought it would be. He was nervous about that but looked over to Nikita holding her candle and saw her smiling. She was enjoying herself and seemed to bask in what was going on inside the church. Although the ceremony was more religious than Michael wanted it to be, it did have lots of music and lots of things that just felt like magic. There were even a few kids that made Nikita smile as they slowly drifted to sleep in their parent’s arms.
“Did you like it?” Michael whispered as the church, still aglow with candle light, was almost empty as the parishioners had hurried home. They had lingered and now were about to leave. Nikita looked at the alter and nodded her head up and down.
Michael had lots of questions but he didn’t ask any of them. He had seen Nikita crying during Silent Night. It was probably a conversation for another time. He continued to hold Nikita as he then took a deep breath and felt Nikita do the same. “I’m glad that you wanted to come here.”
“Do you remember a lot about the holidays with your parents?” Nikita inquired and Michael couldn’t stop himself from smiling. Once he started to remember them, Michael got to really remember his parents. He did worry that all of the memories were happy memories. There had to be bad moments there somewhere and Michael wondered what he would find there when he started to remember those things. But he had lots of good memories – especially around the holiday.
“I remember my mom’s touch,” Michael whispered as he stilled and closed his eyes. He could remember her touching his face with her hand while at Christmas Eve mass. It was like he was the most precious thing in the world and that she needed to touch him and know that he knew that he was precious. He probably didn’t enjoy it as a child, but now, looking back and being in that moment again, he knew that the touch he felt by his mother was much like how it felt when Nikita touched him. “Only you touch me like that, Kita.”
Nikita felt her heart skip a beat when he said that. There was nothing that she expected to hear and to then hear Michael turn it back to how he felt about her, was amazing. Nikita’s throat thickened with emotion and she swallowed hard.
Christmas was proving to be harder for her than she wanted to admit to anyone. She was going to ask Michael more and more about what he remembered so she could focus on something other than what she remembered. Anything to keep the attention on something other than the dreary and dire memories that Nikita had about Christmas. She had clearly thought about it during the mass and she knew that it wasn’t the place to have them. It was the music that just brought the flood of crystal clear memories forward. While Michael had good memories, Nikita had bad ones.
It was during Silent Night that Nikita realized that she had a memory of that song, but it wasn’t at church. Nikita pushed the thought of her mind, she wanted to enjoy Christmas. Michael was doing all these things so she would enjoy it as much as he did. She swallowed her own thoughts and turned to face Michael with a smile on her face. “Michael… I’m not your mother…”
“But your touch makes me feel special… and I know that you are the only woman in the world that will make me feel that way…” Michael replied as he kissed Nikita’s forehead. They were in church and Michael would not dare kiss Nikita more. That would be for the wedding. “That memory matters more than memories of a bike for a gift… or a sled… time with my folks… that’s the most important…”
With concern that this was getting too deep and too much about his good childhood, Michael started to ease Nikita out of the church. “We’ll have time to create our own memories… that’s why I wanted to come here tonight… so I can look back and know that I spent Christmas Eve mass with you.”
Nikita smiled as she felt tears starting to form. One second she was thinking back to what her memories were of Christmas to now thinking about Christmas in the future. She would have Michael, but she wouldn’t be one of the mothers that had to pick up their sleeping child during the mass. She wouldn’t have a child to dress and dote on. She would never have a son that would remember her touch during Christmas Eve mass.
There was a depth in Nikita’s eyes that spoke more than happiness and Michael ached to know why, but did not push. Nikita would tell him if she was ready to tell him. He turned his head and looked outside the church and then stepped in front of Nikita. “My dear, Kita… we must stop.”
“Stop?” Nikita inquired and Michael pushed the door open and Nikita saw the coating of snow that was on everything as the snow lightly dropped from the sky. It was only a light coating, but Michael scooped her up before Nikita could even speak a word. “Michael!”
“I promised Kate…” Michael declared as he confidentially stepped outside and onto the steps. He was careful on the steps, knowing that this was the dangerous place. Once heading towards the car, Michael took a leisurely course, getting off of the sidewalks and into grass and under a tree. He stopped and leaned on the tree to look up at the sky. In the distance, some clouds were breaking and the moon was clear and bright. “We have a white Christmas.”
“We do,” Nikita smiled as she relaxed in Michael’s arms, knowing that he just wanted her to be the best that she could be. He was accepting who she was no matter who she was in the past. Maybe it wasn’t the New Year yet, but Nikita could feel inside that she was a different woman now than she had been just moments ago in the church. She prayed that she could hold onto that feeling for the rest of the Holiday season.
Turning in a circle, Michael then placed Nikita down into the snow. “Michael!”
“Hold on,” Michael laughed as he kneeled and then leaned into Nikita. “Is the coat warm enough?”
Nikita stared at him and Michael then leaned in and pressed his lips against hers. The heat that was growing, but it wasn’t the coat. Michael’s tongue parted her lips and Nikita moaned in pleasure as she tangoed with Michael’s tongue. He slowly pulled away and barely moved his head away from Nikita’s. He stared at her with his vividly green eyes. The desire to have her right there was growing, but both knew better. “I just had to do that.”
“Why?” Nikita whispered and Michael shrugged his shoulders. “Don’t think many people have the memory of kissing their fiancé under a tree, in the snow, almost becoming indecent, just outside of a church on Christmas Eve?”
The church bell started to ring and Nikita paused to answer Michael. The twelve rings later, Nikita licked her lips and pulled Michael to her lips. She pushed her tongue forward and felt the electricity that buzzed between them. She clutched his shoulders for long moments and then finally pushed him away.
“What was that for?” Michael questioned as he swallowed hard and willed himself to move away from Nikita, knowing that they had to safely get home.
“So you have a memory of kissing your fiancé under a tree, in the snow, almost becoming indecent, just outside of a church on Christmas Eve and on Christmas.”
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