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Date Posted: 17:55:52 10/12/17 Thu
Author: Mike84 ()
Subject: Not really...
In reply to: Comicality 's message, "Imagine Magazine Question..." on 15:23:31 10/12/17 Thu

I can talk to anyone one on one, no sweat. But I do get stage fright. But that's not about shyness, it's about being the centre of attention.

Some people have mistaken my preference for being a recluse, for being shy. But it's not the same. I just prefer my own company most of the time. That's not to say I don't value the relationships with family and friends, that I have.

I'm more often the 'approached' rather than the 'approacher', but if someone strikes up a conversation with me, I've no problem chatting with them. I wouldn't say that I was particularly quiet. I just don't feel that need to go find a particular person to have a lengthy chat with -- at least most of the time, anyway. Now and again, I might, either cause I'm bored, or I have something on my mind, or I'm worried about them.

I don't usually have conversations with strangers though. Like people in the street, in a shop, or an elevator. It's just not me. But I'll be polite if someone else starts one with me. But it's usually awkward because I don't know them. This is something else some people assume is down to shyness, but it's nothing to do with that.
I just think that's part of my culture. In Huddersfield no one really does that except for the elderly. People would sooner mug you than make conversation with you in the middle of the street. So that's the way I was raised. But here in Scotland there's so many friendly folk, it took a bit of getting used to, lol.

I also find that people mix up loneliness with being alone. You can feel 'lonely' in a crowded room. And you can be content with being alone most of the time and not feel lonely at all. Some people feel the need for friends and company, any company as long as it's with someone. They don't like, and maybe even hate being alone for too long. Others also try to make as many friends as possible. Everyone's a potential friend.
Personally, I'd rather just have a few close friends. I'm not looking to be friends with every Tom, Dick and Harry.
That's also fine. Everyone's different.

I've been this way for as long as I can remember. Even when I was a small child, if I spent too much time around other people, I felt like I wanted to 'escape'. Which happened quite often cause I was raised in a large household. I was never shy, nor was I quiet. I was just as rambunctious as every other kid around me. But after a while I just needed some space.

Last edited by author: Fri October 13, 2017 07:42:43   Edited 1 time.

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  • Said this before people misinterpret shyness -- Johnny, 20:20:02 10/12/17 Thu

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