Getting myself ready to see Jesse that weekend was like a dream to me. I woke up, showered and got dressed and all...and it still didn't feel real. Even when I brushed my teeth, I looked at the mouthwash bottle beside me, noticing the bluish green color. I held it up to my face and looked at myself in the mirror. Are my eyes really that color? I mean, are they like...no...no wait...ok, now I'm just being weird. Put the mouthwash down, Tristan, and get ready to go out! You're getting a little 'psycho' now.
As I was getting ready to leave, double and triple checking myself to make sure that every hair was in place, my mom asked, "Are you sure that you just don't want me to drive you over to Hillside? It'll probably save you a lot of time..."
"No, thank you. I'll be ok."
"Alright, well...say hi for me." She said, which is weird considering she doesn't know who Jesse is, or vice versa. But whatever. She's trying, right?
"I'll do that, Mom. Thanks." I made sure that I stepped outside and closed the door before she could get out another 'I love you'. It's not that I ignore that kind of sentiment, I just don't want to let HER know that.
Even though I don't say it...it actually feels pretty good. Hehehe, am I going mad, or what?
I called Jesse up to tell him that I was on my way, and I couldn't BELIEVE how excited he was about it! It was almost like he was panting over the phone. I could hear the smile in his voice. I could hear him pacing eagerly back and forth as we talked. It was the most flattering ego stroke that I ever could have imagined. Hehehe, he kept asking me if I remembered where he house was. Like, "You remember how to get here, right? You remember the bus stop? You remember to turn at the thing and walk down to the other thing, and the house number is..."
"I remember, Jesse! Hehehe! I know exactly where you live."
"Are you SURE, though? Tell me if you're not sure. Make sure your phone is fully charged so you can call me if you get lost..."
"I WON'T get lost!" I grinned.
"Just in case though. You know? It was night time the last time you walked through the neighborhood. It might look different in the daytime."
I told him, "Your front porch is the legendary location of my first kiss, Jesse. Like...ever! I highly doubt that I'm gonna forget what it looks like, no matter WHAT time of day it is. Trust me."
I swear, the sound of Jesse's giggle and the slight pause that followed, had a blush all its own. "M'kay then." He said softly. "Just...I'll be waiting, k?"
"K...." I sighed, and we struggled with the urge to say more before saying goodbye, but I don't think either one of us knew how to approach that just yet. It was...I don't know...a bit intimidating, I guess.
I think I remember telling Jason Fixx that I loved him on a few occasions. But I can't really remember feeling any sort of anxiety about it. It felt like real emotion, but it wasn't really. Neither was Jason's reaction to it. The whole thing was about as emotionally involving as getting affection from a hungry stray cat that you let in through your kitchen window. It knows it can get free food from me, and as long as I keep it coming, the cat comes by and feeds at my trough. I, in turn, take that to mean that it likes me for me. Right. And when happens when the free meals stop? You know? I used to be too scared to find out.
I can't believe how much time I wasted. Soooooo much time.
I got off the bus and took the walk to Jesse's house with no problem at all. I remembered every tree, every bush, every crack in the sidewalk. It took me right back to the end of our very first date, and it warmed me up inside until I was quivering all over again.
And then...there it was. The front porch.
"Can I kiss you?" He said. The echoes of it will last me a lifetime.
I don't know why I became so breathless as I walked up and reached for the doorbell. I almost wished that I had given him a call from the bus stop so he'd have a better time frame to gauge my actual arrival at his front door. But...you know...I'm here now. So, let's do this...
I rang the bell, and I think Jesse's mom was coming to see who it was before I heard his hurried voice shout out, "I'll get it!!!" And the pounding sounds of socked feet on the carpet came racing towards the door! He snatched it open, and I swear that his whole body relaxed with a single sigh as he looked me in the face for the first time since we parted ways days ago. "Hey...."
"S'up?" I said, blushing at the sight of this beauty looking at me with such a thrill in his eyes.
We stood there, awkwardly, for a moment...and then he ushered me inside once his brain was functioning again. "Tristan? This is my mom. Mom, Tristan."
Oh wow...she had his eyes. She even had his smile. Well, Imean...it was more like the other way around, but the similarities were unmistakable! "Hi, Mrs. Kyler..." I mumbled softly. She seemed friendly enough, but I was too nervous to look her in the eye for more than a second or two regardless.
She said hello and asked me if I wanted a snack or anything, but I politely declined, and Jesse was quick to say, "C'mon! Me and Artie are working out details and stuff for the next video in my room!" He actually took a hold of my hand. He smiled and touched me, flesh to flesh, and pulled me towards the place where he sleeps at night! Oh GOD, I was finding it so hard to breathe right now!
As soon as we entered Jesse's bedroom...I found myself having a serious fanboy moment!
My mouth dropped open, and I got to see the shelves above Jesse's desk, the posters and fan drawings on the wall, and all of the background stuff that I had only caught glimpses of during the MANY YouTube videos that I had seen posted online! Including the most appealing prop of them all...Artie himself!
Hahaha, oh it was so CUTE! The moment we stepped in through the doorway, I saw little Artie duck down behind Jesse's bed at the speed of light, his little fingers soon crawling over the side...his spikey dark hair rising from behind the mattress until those sparkling blue eyes finally peeked over the side to see me. I couldn't help but to giggle out loud to myself.
Jesse walked over to his desk and said, "We were just planning things for a shoot tomorrow. We might get some stuff done today, but it depends on the weather. I don't know if it's going to rain today or tomorrow..." Jesse was looking through a few pages on his notebook, but Artie stood up and smiled and smoothed out his hair and clothes as he gave me a little smirk. "...Say, Artie? I was thinking that may we could move the tree climbing thing and just use it for the next video instead..."
"Yeah. Uh huh. Shut up. Nobody cares." Artie interrupted, and hurried over to stand right in front of me with a big dreamy smile on his face. "Hiiiiiiiiiiiiii, Tristan..."
"Hehehe, hey, Artie..." I grinned. Artie just stared at me for a few seconds, batting those long eyelashes and gazing at me with a boyish infatuation.
"I'm glad you came....by, that is..." Artie said.
Jesse said, "ARTIE! Hey! Focus!"
Artie never took his eyes off of me. "I'm focused. You wanna take the...thing...and move the thing to the thing. Gotchya. I'm listening." Then he asked me, "Do you mind if I just...like...touch you on the face?"
"ARTIE!!!" Jesse giggled. He got up and took me by the hand. "MINE!"
But Artie grabbed my other hand and pulled back, his little boy's voice cracking from the small amount of muscle he was using to hold onto me. "I know! Don't be greedy! Me and my friend, Tristan, are just talking! Gosh! Go do your...thingy with the notes!"
"Well, behave then!"
"I am! Hehehe!" He said, sticking his tongue out at Jesse before turning to stare me in the eyes again. "You smell good."
"Hahaha! Well, thank you, I think." I said. "I try."
"No...you succeed. Trust me." Then Artie said, "Do you want to sit on the bed. Come on, right here next to me." He didn't give me much choice, and I sat at the foot of the mattress next to him while Jesse giggled to himself and started fidgeting with a small HD camera that was sitting on a tripod not far from his computer. Artie sighed again, and he said, "Nice and comfy, isn't it?"
"Yeah. It is pretty comfy." I told him.
"Do you wanna lay down? You can lay down if you want."
"Thanks, but I think I'm ok right here." I told him.
"Are you sure? Because I'd really love to see what you look like...laying down..."
Both Jesse and Artie had to laugh at his advances, playful as they were. Jesse told him, "Do you think you can stop being a creeper for a few minutes and make us a short storyboard for this?"
"I'm not being a creeper! I just want Tristan to be comfortable. Nothing creepy about that." Then Artie looked at me said, "Can I have some of your hair?"
"ALRIGHT! We're trading places now!" Jesse hollered, and yanked Artie up from the bed to sit next to me while he moved over to Jesse's Desk.
"If you need ANYTHING, Tristan...I'm just gonna be right over here....trying not to think about you. Ok?" He said, and Jesse lightly kicked his chair to get him to work on...whatever it was they were doing.
That's when he smiled at me, and without any further hesitation...his lips gently mashed themselves against my own. Only a shot of adrenaline directly to the heart could have created such an instant and bewildering reaction. The dizziness was almost enough to knock me over the side of the bed. We held the kiss for a few moments, and I became aware of the sound of our smacking lips as Jesse put his hand on my thigh.
My eyes opened, and I peeked over to see Artie watching us over his shoulder with a wink. I broke the kiss, a little embarrassed. "Hehehe, sorry..." I said softly.
Jesse looked back at Artie and kissed my cheek as Artie said, "Don't be sorry. It's not YOUR fault, Jesse never learned how to share!" He gave us a little pouty face, but I don't think he really minded all that much. To be honest, I'm baffled that someone hadn't taken Artie off the market a long time ago. A boy more utterly adorable simply doesn't come to mind!
Jesse gave me a few more brief kisses on the lips, but we didn't really have much privacy with Artie right there and his mom in the other room. So we were sure to keep things PG-13 while enjoying our time together. Not that it wasn't just as satisfying. That boy knows how to stimulate ALL of my senses at once! Just from the power of his smile. It doesn't have to be sexual to be sexual....if that makes sense. I mean...you know? The way he stirs me up and throws me into a state of total emotional chaos without a single touch...I don't think actual SEX with him could create the same thrill. By the time actual intercourse became a part of the equation, I'd be so lost in love that it would be hard for my heart to handle much else.
But, I guess they were in the middle of planning things out for their next video. Jesse scooted as close to me on the bed as he possibly could, and then he gave me another brief kiss on the cheek before opening his notebook on his lap. "See? This is what we were working on. I've got some ideas and notes planned out here, and a few ideas on how to shoot it. Artie's the visual boy, though..."
"I'm the visual boy!" He said, cheerfully.
"So he does some really quick drawings to storyboard the shoot, and put everything else together after we've got all of our footage together. Then we sorta improvise from there..."
I was looking at his room, and it felt like...being in this really FAMOUS place, you now? There was such a familiarity to my surroundings. I couldn't help but to be giddy to the point of wiggling in my own skin. Some people visit the Statue of Liberty, some visit the great Pyramids of Egypt, or Stonehenge, or the Grand Canyon...
...For me? I got to see 'Jesse-101's' bedroom! His camera. His notebook. His whole set up! And I got just as much of an exotic rush as any tourist would at any of those other places. Probably even MORE. Because I get to 'touch'!
Jesse was so proud of his work, there was no doubt about it. And I loved hearing him actually talk about his passion for making videos. He was like a completely different person when he really got into it, and I could just zone out and listen to talk all day if he wanted me to.
"Back here, me and Artie try to keep about five to ten ideas for videos ready in advance. We try to stay ahead of things so we can keep posting new material on a regular basis and keep the momentum going. Sometimes it's easy...sometimes everything gets in the way. And some days we just don't have any inspiration at ALL, but we have to try to come up with a new video anyway."
Looking at his notes and all the extensive details the two of them put together before they even start to film anything...I was seriously impressed! "This looks like so MUCH work! I just thought you guys sort of sat down in front of a camera and just...'did stuff'." I said.
"Hehehe, oh GOD no! Hours and hours of work go into a vid that might only be a few minutes long. Ideas, and filming, and bloopers and mistakes...and then we've got to use a program to edit it, and then we've got to watch it a bunch of times and shave off a few seconds here and there to make sure it all looks cool and runs smoothly...it takes forever sometimes. And even then...some people just don't care. Hehehe! But if you don't put your heart into it, you can't expect to get ny real heart out of it. You know?"
"Yeah...." I sighed. And as soon as Jesse looked up from his notebook, and his sweet blue eyes met mine...another few seconds of kissing was pretty much inevitable. The magnetic pull of him was so strong. Ugh, I'm sorry, Artie! Hehehe, but I can't keep my hands and my lips off of him! I just...I CAN'T! I want more! I CRAVE more!
The only thing that really stopped things from getting too hot and heavy between us was a light knock on Jesse's bedroom door.
We instantly disconnected, and his mom peeked her head in. "Say, boys? I'm going to run out really quick and put a few of my work clothes in the cleaners down on Main Street, ok? I'll be back in about ten minutes."
I think I felt an electric shock go through me when she said that. I think Jesse felt it too, because even though she couldn't see it...he gripped my hand and gave it an enthusiastic squeeze.
"Umm...ok..." Jesse said, trying to hold back a SUPER wide grin!
This should be interesting....
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