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Subject: Larry we need some assistant or help. I could have email you but I want my fellow Users learn something about how we get caught doing illegal on your Website.


Author:
Paul L. Villanueva
[Edit]

Date Posted: Tue, Aug 25 2009

One of your Users with a make up name Reader mention about 100 people a day that browse your Website and I believe him but how could you prove that. My son videos in Yahoo were short so at the bottom of each video it will show how many users viewed at it. Now that he put it all together, it shows right away at the front page. This is the only MB Website where I posted these videos except the last one. So take your pick at magvideo mona tayo mga Kaibigan…..

http://video.yahoo.com/people/5566718

I was looking at Deacon Tom Website but I login as a Power User and I can see all the activities done by any User. Even if the User deleted the information he wrote in. It shows that deletion was made. There is always the time and date when a User login.

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Replies:
Subject: ONE LAST HEROIC MOVE


Author:
OFW
[Edit]

Date Posted: Fri, Aug 21 2009

This is for all the Filipinos out there, and those who are lucky enough to have Filipino friends, those who have Filipino spouses and those who have Filipino next door neighbors.
The story goes like this:

An elderly Foreigner lay dying in his bed. While suffering the agonies of impending death, he suddenly smelled the aroma of his favorite food, Filipino Lumpia.
Gathering his remaining strength, he lifted himself from the bed. Leaning against the wall, he slowly made his way out of the bedroom, and with even greater effort, gripping the railing with both hands he crawled to the kitchen.

With labored breath, he leaned against the door frame gazing into the kitchen. Were it not for death's agony, he would have thought himself already in heaven. For there, spread out upon waxed paper on the kitchen table were literally hundreds of his favorite food, LUMPIA .

Was it heaven? Or was it one final act of heroic love from his devoted Filipino wife of sixty years, seeing to it that he left this world a happy man?

Mustering one great final effort, he threw himself towards the table, landing on his knees in a crumpled posture…his parched lips parted, the wondrous taste of the lumpia was already in his mouth, seemingly bringing him back to life.

The aged and withered hand trembled on to a lumpia, when he was suddenly smacked with a spatula by his wife,

"Git out op here!" she shouted. "dis are por your puneral !"

Original Author: Unknown

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Replies:
Subject: You need to join this site before editing this page. Click F Connect with Facebook


Author:
Paul L. Villanueva
[Edit]

Date Posted: Sat, Aug 22 2009

Fellow Tagudinians go logon now to http://sastagudin.wetpaint.com/ The three Manongs: Deacon Tom, Eng. Polon and Atty Romeo are waiting for you. Go now you will find good stuff if you join in. Just login with your real name or make up name like what you were doing in the MB website. If I did it so can you. So what are you waiting for, just tell them Paul V. sent you. Dr. Conrad, Andring, Femy, OFW, MD Boys, PP2, Avid Fans of Paul V., Jaun Jr., Judy, Marcial, Bonifacio, Taga pacak, Taga Pula ken Taga Lantag and etc that I did not name. Go, make sure you join in to receive the benefit of a member or else you are just like an outsider. Go, you too larry. They are waiting right now. Believe me nobody can tell the difference private or public just want to know the inside.

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Replies:
Subject: M.D.BOYS


Author:
PP2 SISON
[Edit]

Date Posted: Tue, Aug 25 2009

WELCOME THE NEW MEMBER OF THE M.D. BOYS
KRISTOPHER SISON



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Replies:
Subject: News from the region


Author:
Courtesy of the Philippine Daily Inquirer
[Edit]

Date Posted: Mon, Aug 24 2009

Robbers take P500K from Ilocos Sur bank

By Leoncio Balbin Jr.
Philippine Daily Inquirer
First Posted 21:34:00 08/24/2009


CANDON CITY -- Four men posing as depositors took away at least P500,000 from a bank along the national highway here on Monday noon, police said.

Supt. Emmanuel Reyes, city police chief, said the suspects disarmed Glenn Apilda, the security guard of the local branch of Rang-ay Bank, and ordered the three tellers and bank employees to drop, face down, to the floor.

Police said some of the employees were taking their lunch break and no depositor was around when the robbers arrived at 12:10 p.m.

Reyes said one of the suspects ordered teller Cherrylyn Rosario at gunpoint to put the money they found in the tellers' stations inside a backpack.

The employees said the robbers fled aboard two motorcycles about five minutes after barging into the bank.

Reyes said it took another 10 minutes following the robbery for the bank's employees to report the crime to the police.

He said the bank did not have a security camera and did not have alarms linked to the local police station that could have alerted authorities to the crime.

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Replies:
Subject: Parrot Flower


Author:
MB Adm for Tina Laycano
[Edit]

Date Posted: Tue, Aug 18 2009
















To my kailian who haven't seen these unusual but beautiful flowers, I would like to share them with you....they are only found in Thailand and they are protected species.


Tina Laycano.


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Replies:
Subject: The intellect of a woman


Author:
Womanizer
[Edit]

Date Posted: Mon, Aug 24 2009

Pants and Panties

Mike was going to be married to Karen
so his Father sat him down for a little chat.

He said, 'Mike, let me tell you something.
On my wedding night in our honeymoon suite, I took off my pants, handed them to your Mother, and said, 'Here, try these on.'

She did and said, 'These are too big.
I can't wear them.'

I replied, 'Exactly.. I wear the pants in
this family and I always will.'

Ever since that night, we have
never had any problems.

'Hmmm,' said Mike. He thought that might be a good thing to try.

On his honeymoon, Mike took off his pants and said to Karen, 'Here, try these on..'

She tried them on and said, 'These are too large. They don't fit me.'

Mike said, 'Exactly. I wear the pants in this family
and I always will. I don't want you to ever forget that.'

Then Karen took off her panties and handed them to Mike. She said, 'Here, you try on mine..'

Mike did and said,'I can't get into your panties.'

Karen said, 'Exactly. And if you don't change
your smart-ass attitude, you never will.'

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Replies:
Subject: Mini Reunion - SAS Class 1971


Author:
MB Adm
copied from the Seaside Guestbook
Posted by Lope L. Cuaresma
[Edit]

Date Posted: Wed, Aug 12 2009


There will be a mini-reunion of SAS Batch 71 on August 21 2009 at Mang Joe Villanueva's rest house in Becques. Pls contact Corazon Jimenez 09166402749; Lope Cuaresma 09178235063; Flor Leal 09209459430; Marlene Mina 09299623020. Lunch onwards.

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Subject: Tagudinians of Northern California Summer Picnic 2009


Author:
MB Adm for the Tagudininas of Northern California
Sent in by Vangie Kelly
[Edit]

Date Posted: Sun, Aug 09 2009




CALLING ALL NORCAL TAGUDINIANS FOR THE SUMMER PICNIC!!!

PLEASE COME and HELP US MAKE a DECISION on very important MATTER and ISSUES!!!

Let us unite for COMMON GOAL and for COMMON GOOD!!!!

COME AGAIN and ENJOY the CAMARADERIE and FRIENDSHIP of our FELLOW KABABAYANS!!!!

THANK YOU and GOD BLESS.


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Replies:
Subject: LAST "S.O.N.A." OF PRES. G.M.A


Author:
OFW
[Edit]

Date Posted: Thu, Aug 20 2009

She mentioned: "....my term will not end until next year".

This reminds me of the 'No Smoking' sign on one of the Victory Liner Bus.

"NO SMOKING TODAY,
TOMORROW OKAY".

Did anyone get it? Using the same no smoking analogy

By 2010: She can say " Ang kulit n'yo naman sabi kona sa inyo 'My term will not end until next year'eh, di next year.
By 2011..........

Fun! Fun! Fun! Joke laeng kakaili

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Replies:
Subject: Response to the message below "1st "TAKOTSA"annual fundraising"


Author:
mb adm
[Edit]

Date Posted: Wed, Aug 19 2009


Ok here's my take on the message below and a few of the messages in the board which obviously could suggest hate and anger. Ilocanoek laengen ta Ilocano tayo met amin ditoy. I don't usually post anything like this but this time I would like to make a point hopefully to pacify feuding people. Dagitay adda saan nga agkikinnaawatan apo (ammo yo siguron no sino kayo), kurang la siguro iti kommunikasyon. No kimkimen yo dayta gura yo iti tumungal maysa, awan iti papanan na apo no di ket dumakkel laeng dayta apoy making your own lives miserable. I know it is hard but have a heart to forgive and forget, and one way you can do that is by sitting down with that person and I am sure you already know who he/she is and talk it out. Find the bottom of the problem and I could guarantee you that would solve most of the problems besetting you and that other person. If you don't have the guts to do that, MOVE ON. The past is past. There are so many important things in life where we can devote more time and energy with. As one of the posters said "He who angers you controls you!" so I would suggest for you to take a break, avoid going to places in the Internet such as chatrooms, mb's including this mb, etc. where it would just stressed you out to be there. Do that for awhile or better yet stay away all together and perhaps stay away also from that person you hate so much. If you don't bother him/her, he/she won't bother you. Also, there is not really much you can do with what goes on behind your back such as the negative things they say about you so instead of thinking about it just let it go since that is beyond your control. Devote more time to something more productive instead. If you could do all those, you wouldn't believe how peaceful your mind would be thus would make you enjoy life a lot more. These are just my suggestions to those of you who are being bothered by these petty little things which are controlling your emotions.

For those people who go behind a mask through using fake names, fake proxy IP's, etc. when posting so they can get at other people or to instill chaos among people or to a certain a individual, please have a conscience. Depending how you are doing it, it could also be illegal so protect yourselves since you (especially the "parokyanos" of this mb) could pretty much tell who the people are behind these messages.

I don't know a whole lot of people in this mb personally except for a few but I have learned to love everybody like my own close friends but I am very disappointed that there are so much anger and hate among some of our kababayans here as seen on some of the messages and to the many unpublished messages that I've received. The sad thing is it is a fact, and I am not sure if there is really much I can do no matter how hard I try to unite this mb community in my own little way. Yes we do have freedom of expression here and we try to accommodate everyone but I would also like to ask everyone to be please be civilized with your conversations and please do not abuse it. We are all grownups and we know what is good and bad. Let us avoid posting innuendos, intrigues, personal matters(yours or others), personal grudges and most especially insulting remarks. Those are the things where we usually get in trouble with here at the mb. Let us respect one another and respect the messages as well. I do reject messages but that doesn't mean I am turning you away. I just don't want you or the other person or groups getting in trouble. My job here is to present the messages, and what goes on between people outside this mb is none of my business but that doesn't mean that I do not care. I do care for everybody (no exception) and that is coming from the bottom of my heart - no strings attached.

Ala ket uray no kasta, padpadasek nga imintinar latta daytoy nga mb apo. Para kadayo amin daytoy isu nga isakit tay koma met apo otherwise this mb could vanish forever. I hope that is not too much to ask.

This message is directed to all posters, browsers, and readers of this mb.

Naimbag nga aldaw/rabii tayo amin apo.

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Replies:
Subject: 1st "TAKOTSA"annual fundraising


Author:
BOGBOGSA
[Edit]

Date Posted: Tue, Aug 18 2009

Calling to all the old and new members of the "TAKUSA" and "BOGBOGSA"org.for our 1st annual fundraising this coming September.All the monies that we raise in this
fundraising will go to the senior citizen members of the organization.Anyone who is very interested to join the org.
will write your comment on this post,must be 2 years married.We will be posting you the exact date and the location for this event.Thank you.

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Replies:
Subject: ON THE 100TH ANNNIVERSARY SAS ON 2010. Larry, some 2 years ago, this website was used to publicize a fund raising SAS Re-union in Las Vegas. Another one is on going on in connection with the 2010 SAS anniversary. I need enlightenment in 2 areas pls: SASAA was heavily involved in that '07 fund raising and it seems SASAA is again heavily involved in this one. First, there will be an SASAA election of officers in December 2010 which would suggest to me that the term of office officers is 3 1/2 years, (I find it odd) or am I wrong? Can somebody enlighten me on how much was raised in the 2007 fund raising, and what happened to the monies raised in that Vegas affair? Or , I am not entitled to asked? On the other hand, let me publicly acknowledge the explanatory e mails sent to me by 2 SAS Alumnae, Zeny Maala Lopez (she even phoned me) and Mally Somera Bustamante and respectfully say: Ladies, you are a class act .You have my respect and admiration.


Author:
Romeo J. Somera, Esq. CPA- Lawyer (Transparency is a must in fund raising)
[Edit]

Date Posted: Sun, Aug 16 2009


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Replies:
Subject: Picnic Photos


Author:
mb adm
[Edit]

Date Posted: Fri, Aug 21 2009

Any photos from the Tagudinian picnics? It would be great if you could also share them with us here at the mb. Our fellow Tagudinians from around the globe would love to see you even just from those photos.
Thanks guys.

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Replies:
Subject: If you see a message no longer in the mb, either someone had requested to have it deleted or the content is not appropriate for the general readership. If you want a message deleted and you have a good valid reason why you want to have that message deleted, let me know and we'll see what we can do or you can post a message underneath the message stating why you want the message deleted so the poster who posted the message would be aware that his/her message would be deleted.


Author:
mb adm
[Edit]

Date Posted: Fri, Aug 21 2009


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Subject: SAS Class of 1968


Author:
MB Adm
Copied from Seaside Park Guestbook
Posted by Tina Laycano
[Edit]

Date Posted: Fri, Aug 14 2009



Hello Batch 1968! I was informed at our recent SAS Alumni-Canada Chapter Scholarship Fundraising & Reunion 2009 in Toronto, Canada by our batchmate Roger Belmonte (California) that we will have a Batch 1968 reunion in Tagudin at the SAS Centennial Celebration on Dec. 2010. Ex-mayor & Atty. Pepito Bunoan is the coordinator in the Philippines while Roger is the International coordinator. I hope we will meet and see each other in Tagudin after 42 years. Remember the attached photo? Regards!

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Replies:
Subject: Longanisa Recipe


Author:
 
[Edit]

Date Posted: Thu, Aug 20 2009

Since someone mentioned about longanisa earlier, here is a recipe of this tasty sausage from the Philippines. Depending on the region where it is made, it could be sweet or spicy. It is one of the favorite breakfasts for Filipinos, and it is eaten usually with garlic fried rice and eggs or pandesal (Filipino rolls). They call this breakfast combo "longsilog" (longanisa-sinangag-itlog).

Vigan Longanisa
photo zeroface.files.wordpress.com

How to tie longanisa

VIGAN LONGANISA RECIPE

Ingredients:
1/2 kilo ground pork
1/8 cup crushed garlic
1/4 cup chopped onions
1 teaspoon salt
1/2 teaspoon ground black pepper
1/3 cup soy sauce
2 tablespoon vinegar
3 feet sausage casing
1/4 cup water
1 tablespoon cooking oil

Procedure:
1. Mix all ingredients except water and cooking oil in a bowl.
2. Stuff the mixture into the sausage casing and hang under direct sunlight for 4 hours.
3. Heat pan and pour water and cooking oil.
4. Cook under low heat until all water evaporates.
5. Pan fry until golden brown.


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Replies:
Subject: Travel amd Tourism


Author:
Mehreen
[Edit]

Date Posted: Fri, Aug 21 2009

Intrested to go on a world tour??just visit my site to get information about the diffrent countries of this amazing world..u can find culture,religion,history,economy,major cities,resorts,hotels, attractive places and picnic spots of many countries and you can visit the world on your pc....just click

http://worldtour-pc.blogspot.com/

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Subject: Manang Biday Rap


Author:
 
[Edit]

Date Posted: Fri, Aug 21 2009


What do you think?


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Replies:
Subject: Don't forget folks, the Tagudinians of Northern California's picnic is this weekend.


Author:
MB Adm for the Tagudinians of Northern California
[Edit]

Date Posted: Wed, Aug 19 2009



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Subject: apay napunno a dagus diay unegen ta awan met lugarda dagitoy nga aglaklakon?


Author:
juan somera jr. - malakanyang
[Edit]

Date Posted: Mon, Aug 17 2009

http://www.tagudin.gov.ph/new/wp-content/uploads/2009/08/dsc_4941.jpg

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Replies:
Subject: Larry, Let me Try again. Who knows my persistence might pay-off. So here we go: Subject: This is another request among several that I had made on this website. May I call on all SAS Batch 1959 to please get in touch with me either through this website, by email (romeojsomera@yahoo.com), or through the SAS Alumniana International website (sastagudin.wetpaint.com), or through my cousin Nora Sprenger (leonora.sprenger@shaw.ca). Your inputs, ideas, suggestions and involvement are extremely important in making plans and preparations for our participation in the 100th SAS Anniversary Celebration in 2010 (Wouldn't it be nice if we would be adjudged the best Batch, or something?). I call on Poldo & Merced Sarmiento and Patricio Dauz, who frequent this website to please get hold of me and also spread the word around. Thanks Larry, and God Bless.


Author:
Romeo J. Somera, Esq (Patience is a virtue)
[Edit]

Date Posted: Sat, Aug 08 2009


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Replies:
Subject: HR(heavy rock)


Author:
S. P.
[Edit]

Date Posted: Mon, Aug 17 2009

What Is The Color

(lead electric guitar)

What is the color if black is burned
What is the color of an orange
if it's not green?
(heavy drums)

ll

What if your brain
is like your intestine?
Turning leafy greens
into brown incident
Oh yeah oh yeah

lll

Blazing eyes might be red.
Jealous eyes
is hot like a fire,
when it gonna be dead?
(solo guitar then heavy drums)

repeat lll 2x

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Replies:
Subject: TOPIC: PRES. ARROYO's $20,000.00 DINNER IN NEW YORK


Author:
OFW
[Edit]

Date Posted: Wed, Aug 12 2009

I guess FG can afford the check, his land investment in Zambales (he bought it in 1997 for PhP 100,000.00) was sold last year for PhP 40,000,000.00. Huh!? 400% ang kabig. Talagang matinik si FG. Just wonderin'????

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Replies:
Subject: PASSING THE NURSING BOARD EXAM


Author:
ELISA GAZMEN CABATIC
[Edit]

Date Posted: Thu, Aug 06 2009

CONGRATULATIONS !!! TO MARICAR TIONCO THE DAUGHTER OF RICARDO AND ROSEMARIE GAZMEN TIONGCO FROM TAGUDIN, ILOCOS SUR. SHE PASSED HER NURSING BOARD EXAM LAST JUNE HERE IN CALIFORNIA. SHE FOLLOW THE FOOTSTEP OF HER MOM. GREAT JOB !!!

LOVE AUNTIE ELY & FAMILY

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Replies:
Subject: RN BOARD EXAM


Author:
MARY ANN LARDIZABAL SANCHEZ (ARSAB)
[Edit]

Date Posted: Sun, Jul 26 2009

CONGRATULATION TO MARY ANN LARDIZABAL SANCHEZ OF DARDARAT, TAGUDIN, ILOCOS SUR FOR PASSING THE RN BOARD EXAM LAST JUNE. FROM: UNCLE ARNULD AND WHUIDA LARDIZABAL

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Replies:
Subject: CONGRATULATIONS


Author:
The LADI's, SOMERA's, COLLADO's, GANAL's Clan of Dardarat
[Edit]

Date Posted: Wed, Jul 29 2009

Congratulations to Marcelino Cabantac Jr., son of Elizabeth Somera Ganal Cabantac, daughter of Monica Somera of Dardarat, for passing the recent Nursing Board Exam. WAY TO GO JR

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Replies:
Subject: Donaire wins super flyweight title


Author:
Courtesy of the Associated Press
[Edit]

Date Posted: Sat, Aug 15 2009

Donaire wins super flyweight title
Associated Press

LAS VEGAS -- Nonito Donaire unanimously outpointed Rafael Concepcion on Saturday night in his first super flyweight fight to take the WBA interim title.

Donaire, the 26-year-old Filipino star who vacated his IBF flyweight title to move up in weight, improved to 22-1 with his 21st consecutive victory. Judge Max De Luca scored the fight 117-111, Duane Ford had it 115-113, and Jerry Roth called it 116-112.

Donaire used a potent jab to cut open a gash under Concepcion's left eye midway through the second round at the Hard Rock.

Donaire ended the third round with a flurry of punches that nearly knocked down Concepcion (13-4-1), who fought with blood dripping down his face most of the night.

Donaire did show some weaknesses in the middle rounds. That inconsistency led to Concepcion landing a few big punches, but Donaire was never in danger.

He closed the fight by relying on his jab to control the final two rounds to secure the win. It resembled his success in the opening rounds.

Donaire, who successfully defended his flyweight title three times, is determined to get fights with Fernando Montiel and Jorge Arce, the super flyweight division's two biggest names, before moving up, perhaps eventually to lightweight.

Concepcion, who earned the respect of the crowd for going the distance, weighed in four pounds over the 115-pound limit, a violation that cost him 20 percent of his $65,000 purse. Even with a win, he wouldn't have been awarded the championship.

On the undercard, Steven Luevano retained his WBO featherweight title after being floored by challenger Bernabe Concepcion following the seventh round bell. Concepcion, who was trailing on two of the three judges' scorecards, was disqualified.

"The bell definitely rang and he hit him late," said Freddie Roach, Bernabe Concepcion's trainer. "I don't have any argument with that. But it was not intentionally by any means. My fighter was just excited. The disqualification was justified."

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Replies:
Subject: CONGRATUALATIONS ESPIE MAE VALDEZ AGAS, DAUGHTER OF JUN F. AGAS FOR PASSING THE NURSING LICENSURE EXAM!!


Author:
Edith Agas Dauz
[Edit]

Date Posted: Sun, Aug 02 2009

congratualtions espie mae!! good job!! another Registered Nurse in the family.. you made us all proud especially your papa JUNE.. good luck

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Replies:
Subject: Larry, dadiay coma "Walk Away" by Matt Monroe. This song touches my life ever since I was in high school, the melody and the lyrics. I dedicate this song to all street vendors of the world. Thank you Larry, you are very kind man. hhhmmm...walk away just go..hmmm..why build a dream that cannot come true...hhmmm..if I heard your voice I beg you to stay...just ran ran away....hhmmmm


Author:
Manila Boy
[Edit]

Date Posted: Thu, Aug 13 2009


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Replies:
Subject: Larry, can you please include also in your playlist 'THE WINNER TAKES IT ALL'' by ABBA. This song motivates me in everything I DO!!! Thanks, Ading.


Author:
Baguio Boy
[Edit]

Date Posted: Thu, Aug 13 2009


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Replies:
Subject: Music changed Aug. 10, 2009


Author:
dj
[Edit]

Date Posted: Mon, Aug 10 2009


More oldies for you. This time I am taking you again to the late fifties. Here we have songs from 1958 and 1959 – the last year of the great decade called the fabulous fifties. A lot of good songs came out from this time period. Whether you are from that era or from a much later era, these are timeless songs that a lot of us are familiar with. Lots of these songs are still popular. You would hear folks singing these songs at the many karaoke joints in the Philippines.

I dedicate the songs to St. Augustine’s School and Tagudin High School batch of 1959 who are celebrating their golden jubilee anniversaries this year. I hope these songs would bring back memories from your high school years.

Hey Mng Romeo Somera, hopefully this music would attract your former classmate to join you with your reunion that you are trying to organize.

Feel free to make a request if you have a song that you want to listen to from that era. I will be more than happy to play it for you so long as I have the song.

Enjoy.

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Replies:
Subject: I want my fellow Tagudinians sent out your comments to this photo. Sa akin lang no maminsan kasla We are just like toys, trapo or nesnes they played around. When they are done they just wipe you out on top of the headboard.


Author:
Paul Villanueva
[Edit]

Date Posted: Mon, Aug 10 2009



President Gloria Macapagal Arroyo holds the arm of former President Joseph Estrada as they march down the aisle at the wedding of Cebu Gov. Gwendolyn Garcia's daughter, Maria Christina Garcia, to Liloan (Cebu) Mayor Vincent Duke Frasco at the Cebu Metropolitan Cathedral on Saturday, August 8, 2009. Estrada and Arroyo were principal sponsors at the wedding. (Photo by CHERYL T. BALDICANTOS)

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Replies:
Subject: Corazon Aquino, RIP


Author:
 
[Edit]

Date Posted: Fri, Jul 31 2009



People Power's Philippine Saint:
Corazon Aquino, 1933-2009

Click here for the Time Article


[
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Replies:
Subject: Happy Birthday To All August Birthday Celebrants


Author:
 
[Edit]

Date Posted: Mon, Aug 03 2009



Happy birthday to Aloysius Valencia and to all August birthday celebrants.


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Replies:
Subject: A CUTE ONE FROM HEAVEN


Author:
juan jr. - malakanyang
[Edit]

Date Posted: Thu, Aug 06 2009

The couple were 85 years old and had been married for sixty years. Though they were far from rich, they managed to get by because they watched their pennies. Though not young, they were both in very good health, largely due to the wife's insistence on healthy foods and exercise for the last decade.

One day, their good health didn't help when they went on a rare vacation and their plane crashed, sending them off to Heaven.

They reached the pearly gates, and St. Peter escorted them inside. He took them to a beautiful mansion, furnished in gold and fine silks, with a fully stocked kitchen and a waterfall in the master bath. A maid could be seen hanging their favorite clothes in the closet. They gasped in astonishment when he said, 'Welcome to Heaven. This will be your home now.'

The old man asked Peter how much all this was going to cost. 'Why? nothing' Peter replied. 'Remember, this is your reward in Heaven.'
The old man looked out the window and right there he saw a championship golf course, finer and more beautiful than any ever built on Earth..
'What are the greens fees?,' grumbled the old man.
'This is heaven,' St. Peter replied. 'You can play for free, every day.'

Next they went to the clubhouse and saw the lavish buffet lunch, with every imaginable cuisine laid out before them, from seafood to steaks to exotic deserts, free flowing beverages.
'Don't even ask,' said St. Peter to the man. This is Heaven, it is all free for you to enjoy.'
The old man looked around and glanced nervously at his wife.
'Well, where are the low fat and low cholesterol foods and the decaffeinated tea?,' he asked.
That's the best part' St. Peter replied. 'You can eat and drink as much as you like of whatever you like and you will never get fat or sick.
This is Heaven!'
The old man pushed, 'No gym to work out at?'
'Not unless you want to,' was the answer.
'No testing my sugar or blood pressure or...'
'Never again. All you do here is enjoy yourself.'

The old man glared at his wife and said, 'You and your f....ing bran Flakes. We could have been here ten years ago!

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