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Subject: Re: Rejected by parents after death of both siblings

Author: marie

[ Next Thread | Previous Thread | Next Message | Previous Message ] Date Posted: 13:36:54 01/07/06 Sat In reply to: Karen 's message, "Rejected by parents after death of both siblings" on 22:43:01 12/31/05 Sat i know how you feel, my family blame me for my younger brothers suicide. they told me recently i chose my husband over the family! my sons are 6years and 9 years old, the point i'm trying to make is my brother killed himself only in april 2004 (nearly 2 years ago). i have told my mum who i do love, but has been so difficult to leave me alone to give me space. they even have the cheek to upset other family members who speak to me or my husband. the funeral day was ruined by my father hassling me whilst there! flowers have been returned from his place of death by my other brother who is nothing but trouble, he told me i was not welcome at his place of death, or even in the family..... lots more has happened to, but too much to mention. so to answer your question your not alone. i hope your doing ok Karen, my heart goes out to you in a big way! [ Next Thread | Previous Thread | Next Message | Previous Message ]

Replies:

[> [> Subject: Re: Rejected by parents after death of both siblings

Author: Karen [ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 22:22:05 01/16/06 Mon Hi Marie, our situation sounds quite similar in many ways. Thanks so much for sharing yours with me. My father choose to say untruthful/hurtful things about me as part of my sister's eulogy. It feels to me that my parents expected my only role in my brother's and sister's death was as a support to them. They never acknowledged my loss. You will no doubt understand on a rational/intellectual level that in no way are you to blame for your brother's death. Or that you have 'chosen' anyone above anyone else. Especially as your husband and sons are 'family'. But these sorts of accusation are deeply wounding on an emotional level. I think I will carry the hurt of my parents' rejection for the rest of my life. But as time goes by, I find it easier to accept this situation, and just appreciate the joy I experience in other relationships. Karen [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> [> [> Subject: Re: Rejected by parents after death of both siblings

Author: marie [ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 13:05:53 01/23/06 Mon thank you for posting yours too. it kind of helps to know i'm not on my own with family situations being as they are and you too are not on your own. what does not kill you makes you stronger so i hear! i think there could be some truth in that. you sound very kind, understanding and caring, it's a real shame your family did not realise it before they did and said what they have. i do agree though about carrying the rejection of parents, somehow you've given me some more strenth out without knowing. thank you for replying and you take care. [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> [> [> Subject: <3 Re: Rejected by parents after death of both siblings

Author: michele [ Edit | View ]

Date Posted: 07:53:30 07/28/06 Fri Iam so sorry to even hear this , (i happend to come across this site through a friend.) however, i am a PARENT who lost a child.( a precious 8 yearold boy), when i read what you are going through with your parents it touches me in away that i feel for you so much , i understand the pain your parents are feeling to , but instead of carrying this anger they need to embrace you because you need support as much as they do , i have two daughters who i thank god above that i have them , without them i do not know how to get through each painful moment ,family is so important and if your parents should ever some how turn to you and comfort one another it will make the greif some how easier to endure ,beleive me i know how painful this is . i just want to express my heart felt thoughts to you all and i hope your parents some how see things the way i do , and that is to be there for one another . they need you as much as you need them , i wish you all peace and a much healing god bless you all and remember, our dear loved ones who left this world are with us and helping us to cope ...please take care ...sincerly ,michele [ Post a Reply to This Message ]