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Subject: Sister just lost her son

Author: Tylor's aunt (sad)

[ Next Thread | Previous Thread | Next Message | Previous Message ] Date Posted: 13:14:21 09/08/07 Sat Hi: I'm not sure how often this board is read, but I'll post anyway. My sister and I are 14 months apart, she is 37 and just lost her 20 year old son on August 25th in a car accident. I live across the country from her, I did make it to the funeral, and spent some time with her, but I don't know what else to do. I have so many regrets about Tylor, my sister and I had a blow out years ago (I don't even remember why), it was after our father had passed away at the age of 52, I think it was probably all me. I get pissed off at people and cut them off for years. Before that, even though we are as different as night and day, we were very close, and I was SOOOO close to Tylor. Then I blew it for five years. We've been back as sisters for about 5 years now, but I don't feel like I ever made up for the time I lost with Tylor (nor his 15 year old brother Justin). I know he knows I loved him, but the guilt is overwhelming. I can't seem to stop crying, I have two kids myself that are 4 and almost 3. My 4 year old has autism and is non verbal. My husand is in the navy and gone much of the time. I feel very alone, and I have no idea (other than God, of course) who to reach out to. I'm so afraid I'm going to say something stupid and deepen their pain. I want those 5 years that I screwed up BACK! I also had another sister die almost 3 years ago at the age of 42 while I was pregnant with my youngest. Then when my youngest was born, she was very sick and did not come home for good unitl she was 3 months old (she's fine now, just sassy). Then my oldest one had so many health issues for a while, that my EX-BFF accused me of hurting them!!!!! I waited 11 years and had five miscarriages, and *I* would hurt them? For God's sake, I don't even spank them (EVER). That's a whole other ball of wax, but I'm just wondering, is everyone's burden this heavy? OMG, I miss Tylor, I cannot imagine my sister, her husband or son's pain. Does anyone have any ideas? I am heartbroken! [ Next Thread | Previous Thread | Next Message | Previous Message ]

Replies:

[> Subject: Re: Sister just lost her son
Author: Peg [Edit]	Date Posted: 05:42:44 09/09/07 Sun I am so sorry about your nephews death and your remorse about your sister. It really hurts to be so alone. Why don't you go and try to make things up with your sister? There was a time when I was so alone I finally starting reaching out to people and it changed my life. You don't have to be alone with all of this. [ Post a Reply to This Message ]

[> [> Subject: :~( Re: Sister just lost her son

Author: No name (sad) [Edit]

Date Posted: 10:22:55 09/09/07 Sun Oh, we made up years ago, and everything has been fine, I was mostly regretting what happened over ten years ago. I HAD stopped talking to her, and THAT was my regret. They've come across the country twice to visit us just in the last year. I just wish I wouldn't have been so sensitive and stupid 10 years ago. Thank you though, it's nice to know there are people who care. [ Post a Reply to This Message ]