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Subject: Re: Left Behind

Author: Janette

[ Next Thread | Previous Thread | Next Message | Previous Message ] Date Posted: 08:42:13 03/17/08 Mon In reply to: Katie 's message, "Left Behind" on 16:43:57 02/20/08 Wed Katie--I am responding to let you know that yes, what you feel is normal. My words may not bring you comfort but at least you know you are not alone. I stumbled upon your post because I was looking for a memorial poem for my brother, Robbie, who committed suicide on April 6, 1998. He was 28 years old and like your brother, shot himself in the garage of my dad and stepmom's house. It has been ten years, TEN YEARS, and although I have learned to carry on it only takes one thought, reminder, song, face, word, ANYTHING to take me back to that time. The grief will subside but will never leave completely. The guilt will subside but will never leave completely. It is a very strange feeling because it never goes away. For me, it lingers in the deepest pits of my soul and does not show itself on the outside but remains there on the inside. I could go on and on but I am speaking from a different place than where you are now because your brother's death is still very fresh. All I can say is whatever you are feeling no matter when and where, find a way to express it. If you feel like it is an inappropriate time or place, excuse yourself to the bathroom or somewhere and try to release it. I hope you have a good support system you didn't mention your parents. I was 23 years old at the time and had an almost two year old child (he's 11 now) and had it not been for the support of my friends and family, things probably would have turned out very differently for me. I hope and pray you have someone you can talk to, I am including my e-mail address if you want to know more, I am no expert by any means, just someone who was "left behind" also. [ Next Thread | Previous Thread | Next Message | Previous Message ]

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[> Subject: :~( Re: Left Behind

Author: Lost [Edit]

Date Posted: 20:58:07 04/13/08 Sun Hi, I lost my only sister almost 2 years ago from congestive heart failure. I found her. She died in her sleep. I cannot even describe the pain that I have been through. I can't stand to really be around people anymore. I have to put on a game face at work, and by the days end, I'm exhausted. My husband completely ignores me going through my grief. He claims he don't know what to say. I have been mad at him for 2 years cause he just hasn't been there for me emotionally, then wants me to have sex with him. Anyone else's husband reacts the same way? I don't have what you would call friends, only associates. So, I'm alone a lot, and I have flashbacks from finding her all the time. I have been to a therapist, that didn't help me. I have been to grief counseling at church. That didnt help. I have tried reading bible scriptures. I never feel at peace. I'm always wound up, because I'm angry that I have to go through this alone. My mom is in another state. She and I talk everyday, and some days I don't even want to talk to her or anyone. My sis and I were very close. I cry almost everyday. And I constantly dream about her. Some days I don't want to go on. I am hurting so bad, and I'm so alone......I found this board just surfing. I send out condolences to everyone on here that has lost someone. The doctor tried putting me on anti depressants, and that didnt work either. I have no kids. I seriously need help... [ Post a Reply to This Message ]