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Subject: :~( My brother

Author: Trey (dazed)

[ Next Thread | Previous Thread | Next Message | Previous Message ] Date Posted: 01:15:37 02/10/09 Tue I feel so crushed, and full of sorrow... On Jan 21st my big brother shot himself in the right temple... the Doctors at the hospital said that he didn't die immediately, so he had time to suffer... What in God's name am I supposed to do? My family has taken such a beating over the last couple of years... my mom and dad were both diagnosed with 2 different types of cancer (lungs for dad, and pancreas for mom). My best friend died almost 2 years ago 2 weeks before my wedding... Now I have a daughter that i have to stay strong for, so i can't just lose my mind for a while... I'm stuck, and afraid... what do I do? What can i possibly do? [ Next Thread | Previous Thread | Next Message | Previous Message ]

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[> Subject: ☮ Re: My brother

Author: Kati [Edit]

Date Posted: 15:41:05 02/12/09 Thu It sounds so trite to say, hang in there. I am so sorry for your loss. So very sorry. My brother shot himself 20 years ago, and I remember asking the same questions, again and again, tho' hardly ever had the courage to ask out loud. Find a safe place, even if only for a few moments, to express. write. talk. cry. scream. and repeat... For me, it was a whole new chapter. Who I was "before" was now gone, and it took me a long time to accept that. But there are still parts of you that are the same, and the strongest parts of WHO you are is what you hold on to. It's ok for kids to see emotion, tho' being sensitive to what your daughter can handle shows how strong you already are. Keep that up. I'm finding ways to talk about my brother with my two - 4yrs and 2yrs - not forced, but as they see a picture, hear his name. It's hard, very hard, but it IS manageable. get therapy. And if you don't like one therapist, or group, find another. They will listen. Acknowledge every feeling you have. Today, I am sad because my son will never know his uncle. This minute, I feel _____, and it is affecting ________ about my day. My own feelings have run the gamut... even now, twenty yrs later, I'm dealing with regret at not having 'dealt' with some issues I could have earlier. Hang in there. It's not going to be easy, but you will get through this. Peace. [ Post a Reply to This Message ]