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Date Posted: 13:36:14 05/02/09 Sat
My best friend passed away very suddenly a little over a year ago. Dealing with the unexpected passing of such an amazing person has been extremely difficult for all who were close to her, but I have been growing increasingly concerned for her family. I fear that her parents may be taking out their anger on their surviving child, who is also a dear friend of mind. I don't know what to do to help her. If anyone has had a similar experience or has advice about how to deal with it, I would very much appreciate you sharing them with me. Thank you.
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|[> Subject: Re: scapegoating|
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Date Posted: 17:30:50 06/05/09 Fri
According to Dr White's book, this is something that happens with children but I guess it happens with adults too. My sense is your friend's sibling needs your support. Here is a poem that sort of captures it:
Now that I am gone,
Remember me with smiles and laughter.
And if you need to cry,
Cry with your brother or sister
Who walks in grief beside you.
And when you need me,
Put your arms around someone
And give to them what you need to give to me.
There are so many who need so much.
I want to leave you something,
Something much better than words or sounds.
Look for me in the people I've known
Or helped in some way.
Let me live in your heart as well as in your mind.
You can love me most
By letting your love reach out to our loved ones,
By embracing them and living in their love.
Love does not die, people do.
So, when all that's left of me is love,
Give me away as best you can.
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