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Subject: reply to lulu

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Date Posted: 19:41:45 05/27/02 Mon

1. yes, "system" mean the way we're thinking, but it should be more meaningful when we say it means WE. WE are the system, for without WE, we have no system. as one stand-up comedian said, the best way to fight against hegemonic power is to stop having kids. to a larger or less extend, we all contribute to the system, we maintain it, we bound by it, mode it, change it; we trust it, depend on it, fight against it, overthrow it. every single person is the system.

2. it's a paradox, ppl who strive for a change of THE system, especially those in the field of sexual liberation and sexual rights, are so true and passionate and yet at the same hypocratic and cold. we cry slogans, we live by theories, but we despite/forgot about human feelings and emotion, which we think is old fashion and not stylish and should be denounced. I was just asking for a more humane movement and was thrown to the ming kwong sher camp. so you see, this is our limitation. we (including me) always think and act in a dualism manner: either you are we or you are them. so i dont see there is any different between u and me.

3. dont get me wrong. theory is not at all evil, living by the theory and forcing other to live out theory is. i like theory as i like map and dictionary, i have been a theory person in all my life, but there is also a time when i was even blind by theory (the time when i shine like a shooting star). i am learning more and more theory now so (i think) i am more mature with it now. i am just very pissed off by those ppl (eg, those old "comrades") who know a lot of theories and using those theories in a immature way to attack ppl/justify themselves. i perceive myself a honest person so my weakness and limitation is i expect others to be honest (to themselves) too.

4. communicate........actually, i dont really believe in dialogue, coz most ppl do not prepare to change their mind and just wanna change others during dialogue, maybe to u i am also like that. real communicate is very hard for human beings that i am fairly pessimistic to it, tho yes, i really do hope at least we can communicate better as i believe we have been long time ago. however, that does not mean that communicate can solve the loneliness issue. i have been walking into the no-man land and it is not just on ideology, also physical and spiritual.

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regarding communicationele01:39:03 05/29/02 Wed

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