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Subject: regarding communication


Author:
ele
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Date Posted: 01:39:03 05/29/02 Wed
In reply to: gumgum 's message, "reply to lulu" on 19:41:45 05/27/02 Mon

yes it is hard to have communication indeed. and the main problem is not because ppl have difficulties expressing themselves (well, i notice that i'm not assertive enough, and tend to be too agreeable when i should be a bit bitchy in order to stand up for my rights), but rather, we often have difficulties to listen whole-heartedly the views/feelings of others. and when we do, i often find it a 'paralysing experience', because when we really get under the skin of another ppl, their views seem just as valid/forceful/meaningful as ours; and i could no longer tell which view is more cogent/better/superior etc. perhaps that's why the Buddha doesn't encourage ppl to go into philosophical debates, as words/theories are really limiting. to go beyond that for ultimate peace and harmony, compassion and mindfulness need to be cultivated.... because with compassion, we can really open our heart to others rather than attaching ourselves to the grand importance of our ego; and with mindfulness, we can really see and come to understand the interconnectedness of all beings, and how each being is actually a manifestation of the divine (golly, my rhetorics sound very New Age!!).

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