You must truly be suffering right now, Theresa, and I will lift your worries up to THAT which transcends pain and what you can't bear. You MUST get professional advice re: your suitability as a kidney donor. Normally, there is a team in place at the hospital who can do the physiological testing (match, etc), but also counsel you on whether this is the right, overall, decision, for you and your Mom. Meanwhile, you must stay healthy -- eat a nutrionally balanced diet -- you might need a basic good multi vitamin/mineral supplement, cont'd -- inside -- HarmyBoard LifeStyles

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Date Posted: 15:12:41 10/28/09 Wed
Author: mj
Subject: You must truly be suffering right now, Theresa, and I will lift your worries up to THAT which transcends pain and what you can't bear. You MUST get professional advice re: your suitability as a kidney donor. Normally, there is a team in place at the hospital who can do the physiological testing (match, etc), but also counsel you on whether this is the right, overall, decision, for you and your Mom. Meanwhile, you must stay healthy -- eat a nutrionally balanced diet -- you might need a basic good multi vitamin/mineral supplement, cont'd -- inside
In reply to: Theresa 's message, "Kidneys" on 00:47:56 10/28/09 Wed

get adequate hydration,sleep, and exercise. Engage in something that can help alleviate stress. Let us know how you get on.

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[> Theresa, I am so sorry to hear of your mom’s situation as well as what you are going through. I echo the advice given by others, and add a bit of insight from my family’s experience. I have a sister and a brother who each has had a kidney transplant. First of all, is your mom already on dialysis? While dialysis is certainly not fun to go through, it does typically give a person time – and gives you time to think about possibly being a donor. (Inside) -- lisa, 18:32:13 10/28/09 Wed [1]

And as I’m sure you know, you’ll have to go through a process to determine if you are even a match. From what I know, kidneys are more easily matched than other organs, and as a result, there is every reason to believe a non-related match could work. In fact, there may be a more distant family member or even a friend who could possibly match.

In my family’s case I and three of my five sibs have a condition called polycystic kidney disease which can lead to kidney failure as it did with my sister and brother. The two sibs without could potentially be donors. One was ruled out, one sister was a potential match, however a close friend of my sister felt led to see if he would match. He turned out to be a perfect match and the fact that he was a male was even better. Because a male kidney is bigger that a woman’s, kidneys donated from men are especially ideal – as I’ve been told.

And, if your mom is on a donor list, you never know when a match might be found. That is how my brother received his transplant before he even needed dialysis. His kidneys were starting to fail, but not to the point of needing dialysis when he received a middle of the night call stating there was a kidney for him. He almost didn’t take it because he felt he wasn’t that bad off yet. It took his doctor calling him personally in the middle of the night to tell him he was crazy not to.

I tell you all this to say, don’t rush into a decision – especially when there may be other options. While of course you want to help your mom who I sense you are very close with, it may well be that the way you can help her is to support her in other ways while you parent your children. Recovery from a transplant, both by the recipient and the donor, takes time. I think the friend who donated to my sister was off from work several weeks (it may have even been as much as 6 weeks – I can’t remember.)

You and your mom will be in my thoughts and prayers as you go through these difficult times.

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