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>From the home office in blue-state New York, here’s >Vice President Dick Cheney’s top 10 excuses for >shooting fellow hunter Harry Whittington on Saturday: > >10. Sick and tired of Whittington’s “Hey, I’m having a >heart attack” jokes > >9. Pushed over edge by Dixie Chicks and Streisand >blasting on pick-up truck stereo > >8. Ongoing dispute over whether it’s acceptable to >torture quail before shooting them > >7. Thought he saw Michael Moore on other side of tree >line > >6. Bombed out of his gourd on Wild Turkey and Lone >Star Beer > >5. Companion’s ill-advised decision to wear Moveon.org >sweatshirt > >4. Was trying to impress Jodie Foster > >3. Whittington’s repeated ribbing that Bush is >actually the “real president” > >2. Targeting scope on rifle made by Halliburton > >And the number one excuse given by Dick Cheney for >almost blowing away hunting companion Harry >Whittington… > >1. Because he’s a wartime vice president, damn it > >More of Bob Geiger's work can be found at BobGeiger.com

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