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>I've been out of a 25-year abusive marriage for almost >seven years. During those seven years I have healed >and moved on in so many aspects of my life . . . my >relationships with my children are loving, nurturing >and balanced; I am successful and appreciated at work; >I am in school pursuing my dream; I have friendships >and activities that are whole and fulfilling. I have >dated many men over the past seven years; the minute >things started getting serious or complicated, I would >bolt, usually around two months. I started dating >someone almost a year ago and we have fallen deeply in >love. And it's wonderful, truly. But I find I >withdraw or acquiesce when difficult situations >present. When it comes to fight or flight, my m.o. >has been to fly. But this man is definitely worth >fighting with and for. I have come so far and gotten >so much healthier, but staking my claim and standing >my ground is a stumbling block for me. I know he >would listen and take into account what I have to say. > It's just so hard for me to say it. I think the >feeling stems from something I got from my mother: >"don't be difficult"; I feel like other people's needs >are perfectly acceptable but mine are difficult or >less worthy. How can I work past this? Thank you so >much for your time and consideration Dr. Kemble, your >sight is truly a godsend. >Best, Catherine Grace
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