| Subject: Deneisa, I'm glad to hear you are still moving forward (click in) |
Author:
no professional
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Date Posted: 14:12:10 11/26/06 Sun
In reply to:
Deneisa
's message, "Re: I am no professional, but went through abusive relationships until (click in for more)" on 13:01:06 10/23/06 Mon
Deneisa, I'm glad to hear you are still moving forward in your healing. Personally, I found myself tempted to fall back into the relationship with my own abuser when he was too accessible, All he had to do was get close enough to lean in and smell my hair and I was jello again. Because of this I had to create alternative support for the space he vacated, and maintain distance (for my own healing to continue). I found because of the kids visits every time I saw him, it would be like loosen the healing scab forming over my emotional wounds...very tough at times. Many tears spent. While parenting alone 90% of the time was more work both physical and emotional, I knew the pay-off for me and my children far outweighed my ongoing weariness. Looking back I realize, If I had taken him back again there was the possibility state children protective services may have stepped in. On our way back to 'normalville', We would celebrate the end of a difficult week (my kids and I) by having a slumber party in "Mom's room" staying up watching silly movies, eating popcorn and fall asleep in a heap on my bed. Waking up in the quiet house with crumbs in my bed and my kids so near me eased my adjustment to my new life. I would go into their rooms at night get on my knees and lay my head on their bed to pray for courage and wisdom. Often I would cry because of the pressures I felt. Some days were SO tough, but each one that passed was usually easier than the last. I pray you are comforted in the knowledge you are not alone on your journey.
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