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] Date Posted:10:39:42 10/03/06 Tue
I don't know where to begin~ When we met 13 years ago, it was a strong bond. To this day, he can walk in a room and I get butterflies like a little girl. I miss him if I don't hear from him. Before we were married, he informed me he had an attraction to men. It had been physical a few times, and he considered himself bisexual. Since that eventful evening, there was (almost) one encounter. He states he could not go through with it, as I was in every thought. Over the years, I know of his actions that are only voyeurism and chat on line. But, what it has escalated to, has come to a crossroads. I no longer feel I can ignore how left out I feel at times, and how hurt I am with his interests. Our intimacy is nill. I feel left out and hurt. I have an appointment with a counselor next Monday to start to get us on the right path. How fortunate I am that we do have a strong line of communication that (even though the road is going to be long)we BOTH want this to work. I'd love to hear from anyone with related events. I feel alone.
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Date Posted:04:42:34 10/04/06 Wed
You dont need to go through this alone! There are millions of straight spouses out there.. in fact in alternatepath alone there are over 700 women married or in relationships with bi or gay men, all who want to stay in that relationship.
Here is a link to my "Out Together" project, which is a collection of stories from other men and women in the same boat as you find yourself in:
http://www.straightspouse.org/OutTogether.shtml
There have been times where I worry about the sex. Its so important to me to have our intimacy, and sometimes I feel like I am losing him to his fantasies. But what we have going for us is this really strong connection, and so we talk through these times. I know my husband is committed to staying married to me.. I know he loves me more than anyone he has ever loved. He is gay though. SO his natural attractions are for men, not women. Does that hurt...knowing that? Sometimes yes!! But why do I stay then? Because I cannot find another soul out there that could ever compare to the one thats connected to me.
I have been married for 23+ years and I still get those butterflies in my stomach whenever he walks into the room. He would do anything for me... and if he had to give up sex with men.. he would do that also, to stay with me. But he and I have decided to try this odd relationship... we have opened up our marriage for both of us.
Thats working for us. Its not something that is going to work for everyone, but it sure works great for us.
Have you applied for membership to alternatepath yet? Its a great site and there are many different relationship types represented there.
hugs
trill
Date Posted:03:11:21 08/09/09 Sun
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