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Subject: diaper position


Author:
Marta
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Date Posted: 08:24:31 01/08/13 Tue

What do you think about legs up position?
My son is 6, and doughter is 3 year old. One of my friend told me that she spanks her kids in this position and it's very effective. She thinks that humiliation is very important part of punishment.

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[> Subject: Re: diaper position


Author:
Silvona
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Date Posted: 01:14:37 01/09/13 Wed

I spanking my kids/teens in the diaper position.
HOWEVER
I do not do so in order to humiliate.
In fact I am very strongly opposed to any form of punishment that has as its purpose to shame or humiliate.

Why not? Isn't shame effective?
Shame is enormously effective. It is one of the few things that is a great deterrent then pain. However it is a lot more dangerous and harmful.

I believe that deliberately shaming your children damages your relationship with them. In contrast, I frequently inflect a great deal of pain on my children, who because they know I do so out of love to discipline them, grow closer to me because of it.

Isn't any discipline shaming?
Yes it is. No doubt whenever children do something wrong they feel shame. When they are caught they feel shame. When they are disciplined (by whatever means) they feel shame. No doubt some forms of discipline are more shaming than others. However I don't do anything with the PURPOSE of causing shame.

So what is the difference between this shame and the shame and humiliation I feel is degrading to your child and harmful to your relationship with your child?

Three things are key, in avoiding harmful forms of Shame.
1) Unconditional Love - I have decided that I am going to love my kids, no matter how they behave. That love might involve blistering their bottom - but it is still love.
2) Unconditional Acceptance - I have decided that I am going to accept my children, no matter how they behave. I will never use rejection to punish them.
3) Unconditional Status/Value - I am going to value my children as special or honored. I don't mean that teach them to be brats and that the world revolves around them and their needs. What I mean is that they are precious to me and they have dignity. Even when they are lying the bed, bottom bare and raised in the air; even when their face is stained with tears and their voice hoarse from crying, I can still respect their dignity, and remind them how much I love and value them.

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[> Subject: Re: diaper position


Author:
Silvona
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Date Posted: 02:05:26 01/09/13 Wed

After my long rant about shame and humiliation, I though should say something positive about the diaper position.

1) The diaper position gives you excellent access to the child's bottom, the back of the thighs and both the inner and outer thighs. You can also spank the bottom from all four directions. The position is suitable both for close hand spanks and for using a strap or similar implement requiring space to swing.
2) The skin is stretched, making the spanking more painful, (without causing more damage).
3) You can see your child's face, talk more easily and gain a better assessment of how much pain you are causing your child.
4) Although some diaper positions are difficult to maintain, the "locked diaper position" that I will describe is both easy to for the child to maintain without the parent holding them, and easy for a parent to hold all four of the child's limbs in place, with just one hand.

The only down side of this position is that it is the possibility of accidentally hitting the child's genitals. This can be solved, either by taking greater care, or by making the child wear a groin cup / jock strap.


The Locked Diaper Position

1) Position the child so that they can lie down on their back comfortably, with their bottom raised up, and with good access to their bottom from three sides. For example place pillows on the corner of a bed, and position the child with their bottom hanging just a little over the corner. Or using a sofa (preferably with a very low back, or no back at all), position the child with their bottom raised by the arm of the sofa.

2) Bring the child's legs back, so that their knees touch the child's shoulders, while their ankles interlock just above the child's head. The child legs should form a ring.

3) Bring the child's arms inside the ring made by the child's legs. Their hands should then be brought around their ankles, and interlock fingers on the other side of the ankles.

4) [Optional since in this position, the child will find any movement of arms or legs difficult, and most children should be able to maintain the position, without assistance.] Place a parental hand on the child's interlocked hands. The child's arms, now held by the parent's hand, will keep the legs locked also.

You are now ready to spank.

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[> [> Subject: Re: diaper position


Author:
Vera
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Date Posted: 10:15:12 01/10/13 Thu

I was wondering if your children co-operate and put themselves in this position for you or do you have to physically force them into it?

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[> [> [> Subject: Re: Cooperation and Corner time until willing to submit to a spanking Thread: diaper position


Author:
Silvona
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Date Posted: 10:32:15 01/12/13 Sat

All my children cooperate.
In fact more than that, my children will sometimes confess what they have done and will suggest spanking when asked how they should be disciplined.

Although I reserve the possibility of forceably spanking children, I haven't had to do this for a very long time.
Rather if my kids are not ready to submit to a spanking I talk with them and try to convince them that this is the best thing for them, and that it is what they deserve.
I talk and talk, but if that fails I send them to the corner.
They stay there until they are ready to receive their spanking. That includes getting into position.
I would tell them that they could spend as long as they reasonably needed to prepare themselves, but my children learned fairly early that adding corner time to a spanking wasn't a very smart idea, and learned to submit right away.

In the event that more persuasion is necessary, you can inform your children that they can stay in the corner longer, but every five minutes when you ask them if they are ready, if they are not ready, you will add 5 swats to the spanking.
If that still isn't enough, get them to bare their bottom in preparation.
If they are still not ready after a few more minutes, than apply one hard swat while they stand in the corner each time you check on them. Inform them that these are extra swats (ie don't count towards the spanking they have earned).
I have never needed to, but I would be quite happy to keep this going for two or more hours.
However if you have decide that you need to bring things to a head, then take the child out of the corner, and seat them on your lap.
inform them that they have had enough time to prepare for a spanking at that this is their last chance to submit to it willingly. If they still refuse then force them into position and spanking them for what they have done and add extra for their refusal to submit. I have only had to do this a few times, and all when my kids were very young.

If at any time when they are in the corner and they come out then I immediately give them a spanking (forceably) for leaving the corner, and then I send them back to the corner (this time their bottom bare) until they are ready to submit to the original spanking.

I don't use corner time in other ways, only in this self imposed way, for children to prepare themselves to be spanked. In this way, submissive and complaint children avoid having any corner time.

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[> Subject: Re: diaper position


Author:
JP
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Date Posted: 06:09:05 01/12/13 Sat

Silvona seems like an expert! lol
I think this site has said that the diaper position is not a good way to go with it. No need to get elborate either.

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