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Date Posted: 06:54:48 02/11/07 Sun
Author: No name
Subject: Ok I have a question LOL

This is just a general question kind of for everyone...

Ok my mom loves to go to pageants. However she always ends up embarrassing me within the first two minutes and it doesnt stop the entire pageant.
She will make comments like-That little girl is cute but "Suzy" is cutie. Or "Suzy" has a cuter dress.
Or is that child wearing a wig?
Or why are they putting teeth in that child?
Or that swimsuit is tacky
Or you can tell that childs shoes are too big/small
Or she wasnt even looking at the judges

so on and so on and so on...you get the point

The entire pageant. I understand she loves my daughter and wants to support her. But in her eyes no one is better then "Suzy" and no one has better clothes, routines, eye contact, smiles etc.
And she doesnt just whisper these comments or save them for after the pageant. It is the entire pageant long constantly constantly

Its gotten to the point where we do not invite her anymore. But then she feels left out and wants to be included. I have tried to explain to her that isnt acceptable but thats just how she is (she makes comments like that in all areas of life not just at pageants)

So my question is how would you deal with it.
And as a judge if you overheard a grandma making those types of comments how would you react?
And would you intentionally or even unintentially hold it against the child?

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Replies:

[> Re: Ok I have a question LOL -- newbie, 08:16:37 02/11/07 Sun [1]

Sounds like your mom and my mom are on the same bowling team. LOL! Yes, I know how you feel. I finally had to just say to my mom, that if she had an opinion, to write it down, and then she could tell me about it after the pageant in the hotel room LATER. She ended up spending so much time writing that she missed half the pageant anyway, but at least she didn't make feel embarassed by her comments, and she's now had less and less to say. Also, you might want to remind her that sometimes Pageant Directors give a spirit award or directors choice award. I think the family's actions somehow play into those awards too. Good luck!


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[> My take on this -- judge, 12:22:21 02/11/07 Sun [1]

As a judge, I don't have time to pay attention to things that are happening behind me. I don't listen to comments in the audience b/c my focus is on each contestant as they are up on that stage. I can see how you feel though b/c I would definitely be embarrassed by my mom if she were the one doing this. You just have to flat out tell her "If you can't stop making comments, you won't be going to watch "Suzy" anymore." This is a time for you and your child to enjoy together. Don't have a grandmother there that's going to ruin this time for you or your child.


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[> [> Absolutely! Make it a condition of her being able to come. I would never hold any comments I hear against your child, but I can tell you that many judges would! I may even comment on her score sheets that family should watch what they are saying if it was loud enough to hear at the judges table. -- No name, 13:37:24 02/11/07 Sun [1]

>As a judge, I don't have time to pay attention to
>things that are happening behind me. I don't listen
>to comments in the audience b/c my focus is on each
>contestant as they are up on that stage. I can see
>how you feel though b/c I would definitely be
>embarrassed by my mom if she were the one doing this.
>You just have to flat out tell her "If you can't stop
>making comments, you won't be going to watch "Suzy"
>anymore." This is a time for you and your child to
>enjoy together. Don't have a grandmother there that's
>going to ruin this time for you or your child.


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