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Subject: Politicians, win or lose, should read this post. Here's an excerpt:

Light Blogs (Surigao.Surigao)
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Date Posted: 20:41:00 05/19/07 Sat
Author Host/IP: NoHost/

Those who plan to run for public office in the future might find these useful. At least I know I will.

1. People will sell their right to choose for P300. Any amount higher and theyd give you their souls. Half of that right can also be acquired through the distribution of the following items: ballpens/pencils (hmm perhaps because were nearing the opening of classes?), bath soaps (people like to take a bath more during summer?), detergents (taking a bath a lot leads to having a lot of laundry and thus, a greater demand for detergents), a kilo of rice (people are always hungry) and some other household commodities.

2. TV and Radio Ads are useless. Even Pichay can attest to that.

3. You actually need not go to campaign sorties if you have P15-25 million in the bag. (Read lesson number one for more details)

4. Be prepared to get junked by your party-mates especially when they feel you are about to go down.

5. Artista endorsements are no longer a factor although it would give you a false understanding of where you really stand since people will still flock your rallies.

6. If you decide to buy votes, do not in any way trust barangay captains or poll leaders. They will keep your money for themselves.

7. Sensible, realistic and good platforms are not necessary when campaigning. People will only listen to dumb jokes. Great flirting skills are an advantage.

8. Be prepared to learn whatever new dance Wowowee will teach. The people will inevitably ask you to do it.

9. Be sure to have contacts within the COMELEC.

10. Be nice to teachers. Yes, sometimes they cheat and your poll watchers may be too dumb to notice.

11. Do not in any way publicly bash your opponents. It will make them appear as underdogs and they might gain the peoples sympathy. Sympathy more often than not translates to votes. Philippine Idol results can attest to that.

12. If your opponent decides to bash you publicly, do not retaliate or appear defensive. Same reason as the above.

13. And lastly, if you do win keep 10% of your intelligence fund or pork barrel to yourself. You will need it for the next elections.

Courtesy of Light's, Surigaonon Blog at


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Subject Author Date
Nakakalungkot isipin, na milyon milyong kababayan natin ang halos mamatay sa hirap ng buhay, pero walang ginagawa ang mga nasa gobyerno kung pano iaangat ang istado ng buhay ng Pilipino. (NT)Jose (Surigao)19:37:28 05/21/07 Mon

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