Date Posted:18:38:53 04/05/12 Thu Author: Bob Author Host/IP: 18.104.22.168 Subject: Memo Reveals New NA$CAR Manipulation
Copied from somewhere else...
Saw this article in The Daily Movement yesterday....
Memo Reveals New NA$CAR Manipulation
An internal NA$CAR memo carelessly left at a P. F. Changs Chinese buffet restaurant in Charlotte and found by a reporter, reveals the latest methods that are used by the France family to manipulate the outcome of the France Cup races.
Written in crayon, the memo details how NA$CAR can now remotely program the Electronic Fuel Injection (EFI) of any car to stop functioning during a race to cause what was formerly known as a "debris caution." This system was used this past weekend at Martinsville to cause David Reutimann's car to stall on the frontstretch setting up the exciting made-for-TV finish of the race.
"Our fan base is shrinking and fans are starting to catch on to our debris cautions which we used for the past fifty years to tighten up the field when someone stinks up the show," the memo states. "Therefore, we need to move NA$CAR into the modern times and manipulate the outcome of the races with modern technology if we are keep fan interest in our sport. It is more likely than not that it will take at least another fifty years for people to catch on to this as a majority of the male fans in our sport think Danica is sexy and they they have a chance to date her."
In other news from the weekend, Kevin Harvick showed why he is king of the Pick-Up Truck series as he led a ton of laps and easily beat the other underfunded and inexperienced young drivers with his top of the line expensive equipment and won the race on Saturday. On Sunday, he showed why he'll never likely be a Sprint Cup champion as he finished nineteenth when he had to race against real racecar drivers.