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Subject: Semen Samples


Author:
Billy
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Date Posted: 23:36:49 10/17/09 Sat

Although a lot of this board is occupied with the nudity issue and opposite gender medical personnel, which I do not object to if it is necessary, I have seen a post or maybe two, don't remember if it was on this board or not, where males were required to masturbate at the physical exam to give a semen sample for testing to the doctor or nurse.
I never heard of this procedure before, can anyone confirm it?

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Replies:
[> Subject: Re: Semen Samples


Author:
Rodger
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Date Posted: 23:59:12 10/17/09 Sat

for reproductive testing, I can see being asked to masturbate to produce a fresh sample. The only semen sample I've ever had to produce was after a vasectomy, but I collected it at home. I was weird though, handing it to the cute receptionist at the clinic. I should have insisted that my wife take it in, but she was still a bit upset that I had gotten cut without telling her.

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[> [> Subject: Re: Semen Samples


Author:
tobias
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Date Posted: 15:31:34 04/09/10 Fri

This was my experience too. I had to supply semen samples twice: once during fertility testing, and again after a vasectomy. In both cases I was simply given the plastic specimen bottle to take home and told to abstain for three days before before producing the sample, then bring it to the clinic immediately.

We've all heard the accounts of people masturbating to clinic-supplied porn in private rooms when donating sperm at fertility clinics. But at a conventional clinic, when the sample is needed simply to check for sperm count, motility, etc., you're going to be doing this at home.

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[> Subject: Re: Semen Samples


Author:
VOR
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Date Posted: 10:10:24 10/18/09 Sun

A semen sample is usually only required if you're having trouble conceiving a child, and your sperm count needs to be tested.You will have to masturbate at the clinic,but NOT in the doctors office with supervision.Anybody story where someone had to masturbate in front of a doctor or nurse is not true, and you shouldn't believe it.

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[> [> Subject: Re: Semen Samples


Author:
Peter
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Date Posted: 13:33:59 10/19/09 Mon

I must be a one off case then. I went to my doctors a couple of months ago because me and my girlfriend have been trying for a baby for almost a year now and also i have a tiny lump behind my testicles i was worried about. The doctor examined me and said she thought the lump was nothing more than crystalised cells but she would send me to the hospital for an ultrasound scan of the scrotum. She also gave me a sample bottle to provide a semen sample. The notes she gave me said i had to produce the sperm sample and get it to the pathology department within an hour. I did this but the reading came back low. My doctor said i should do the test again and i picked up another sample bottle and did it again a week later. This reading came back better but she said it was still a bit low and i should do one more. By now i was a bit fed up keep going back and forth to my docs, but i had the date for the scrotum scan so i thought i would do it again after that.
At the hospital a nurse took me in to a private room and she spent about twenty minutes scanning my testicles. During this time we were talking and i told her about me and my girlfriend trying for a baby and the sperm samples i had provided. She said it would be far better to produce the sample at the hospital so it could be at the pathology department in just a couple of minutes.
She gave me a handful of tissue to wipe the gel off my scrotum after the scan, as i was cleaning myself up she was taking the lid off of a sample bottle. I stood up and threw the tissue in the bin and she handed me the bottle and asked if i had masturbated or had sex in the last three days. I hadn't and told her. She said that was okay then so i could produce a sample now. She sat down at her desk beside me and started typing. I started to masturbate. After less than a minute she turned to me and said that the ultasound results wouldn't be at my doctors for at least couple of weeks. I looked at her and said okay and carried on what i was doing. She watched me until i ejaculated into the bottle. She took the sample, put the lid on it and wrote what it was on the label and put it in a bag. I cleaned myself and dressed.
She handed me the sperm sample and said i know you already know where the pathology department is and told me to take it straight there. So off i went.

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[> [> [> Subject: Very Puzzling Indeed


Author:
Carl
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Date Posted: 16:34:07 10/19/09 Mon

If the results of your ultrasound would not be in your doctor's hands for a couple of weeks, why was she in such a hurry? Why did she invite you to give the sample so soon?

Also, there's no reason for an ultrasound report to take so long. Normally, two days is more than enough time, and most often it gets there the next day by email or fax.


There are a lot of puzzling aspects to the experience you described in your post. Care to explain more about it?

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[> [> [> [> Subject: Re: Very Puzzling Indeed


Author:
Donal McL.
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Date Posted: 18:55:37 10/19/09 Mon

Look, pal. If you don't believe him, say so. Stop pussyfooting around.

Me, I think it could be true. I know a guy very well who told me that a nurse watched as he produced a sperm sample at Mass General Hospital in Boston at their fertility clinic about four years ago. He had problems producing one earlier. His endocrinologist, a woman, assigned him to a specific nurse for the next sample. When he met her she suggested to him that her presence would help, and stayed in the room as he masturbated. It did help, to his amazement and embarrassment. He was not overly happy to admit it and I believed him.

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[> [> [> [> Subject: Re: Very Puzzling Indeed


Author:
Peter
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Date Posted: 11:13:29 10/20/09 Tue

The ultrasound scan had nothing to do with me providing a sperm sample. I was having the scan under the instruction of my doctor, she wanted to make sure the small lump was nothing more sinister. She wanted me to produce a sperm sample at home in my own time and take it to the hospital. I called her after I had done this and she had the results, she said the reading was low and I should do it again. So I went back to her got another sample bottle and did it all again. A week later I called her she said the reading was better but I should do it yet again.
My appointment for the ultrasound was a couple of days later so before I had a chance to go back to the doctors for yet another sample bottle, I went for the ultrasound.
There was no hurry for me to produce another sample, I was simply talking to the nurse about the fact I had already provided two and my doctor wanted me to do yet another.
Whether the reality was the nurse was kindly saving me from going home producing another sample on another day and taking another morning off work to take it to the hospital, when I was already there and the pathology department was a couple of minutes walk from where I was being scanned? Or she thought she would have an almost naked man that had just spent half of a very thorough twenty minute scrotum scan laying in front of her with an erection, stand up and masturbate for her amusement, I dont know.
The results probably take a couple of weeks because its the National Health Service, everything takes a long time here.

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[> [> [> Subject: Re: Semen Samples


Author:
Billy
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Date Posted: 06:28:29 10/20/09 Tue

I think Peter's account is credible, whether the nurse would be present or not, because sperm effectiveness quickly deteriorates after a few minutes, so it wouldn't be an accurate sperm count in the laboratory after that, the fresher the better in this case. I know of a case where the nurse actually masturbated him to get over with it quick after checking him. He said it didn't take long for him to come after a few flicks.

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[> [> [> Subject: Re: Semen Samples


Author:
VOR
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Date Posted: 19:10:42 10/26/09 Mon

Peter is full of crap.There's no reason for the doctor to be present during the ultrasound.The sonographer knows what they're doing and doesn't need the doctor making sure of anything.The clinic will pass on the results to the doctor and the doctor will see if it's something more sinister or not.

If you need to give a sperm sample, you go to the fertility clinic where you're given a cup or a specialized condom that you use to collect the semen during intercourse.If the reading come backs low, then you have a low sperm count.One sample is enough to know your sperm count,there's no reason give sample after sample.


And to Donal McL:Your friend is lying to you.If you believe him,then I have a bridge I'd like to sell you.

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[> [> [> [> Subject: Re: Semen Samples


Author:
Peter
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Date Posted: 11:37:11 10/27/09 Tue

Can't you read the Queens English you moron, i never said the doctor was present at the ultrasound scan, she wasn't. I was in the room with a nurse.
Sperm samples go to the pathology department in the hospital to be analyzed, and sperm counts vary greatly produced on different occassions. I've given three samples now all showing different results.

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[> [> [> [> [> Subject: Re: Semen Samples


Author:
VOR
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Date Posted: 19:14:34 10/27/09 Tue

Doctor or nurse, the story is BS.A nurse wouldn't be present while a guy jerks off.Insisting that the story is true doesn't make it so.I'm sure some people will believe it, especially since the story doesn't seem too outrageous.But having a story that's not too outrageous is what is so ingenious about it.People are less likely to doubt a story when the details don't seem too 'out there'.I'm not as gullible.

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[> Subject: Most Of The Story Makes Sense, Except For...


Author:
Carolyn
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Date Posted: 15:44:35 10/20/09 Tue

Of course a fresh sample is best. Of course there was no point in making him take time off from work. Of course it would be convenient for him to provide the sample while he was only a few doors down the hall from the lab. No question about any of the above.

The only part that makes no sense is the necessity of the nurse staying in the room to watch him give the sample.
That was over the top, wouldn't you say? She could have sent him into a cubicle. She could have stepped out of her office for the few minutes it would take. Why did she stay?
Why did he do it in front of her?

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[> [> Subject: Re: Most Of The Story Makes Sense, Except For...


Author:
Peter
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Date Posted: 11:29:51 10/21/09 Wed

As you say Carolyn there is no question about the benefit of giving a fresh sample, me being close to the lab and not having to take more time off work.
But although there was no real necessity for her to stay and watch me. The hospital was very busy, and Im sure she was very busy with lots more people to see after me. I guess for her to find me another room or for her to leave the room we were in would not have been 'convenient' and Im sure she wouldn't have bothered, but rather sent me on my way. After all, I was there for the ultrasound scan, not for giving a sperm sample.
When she handed me the jar to masturbate into of course I could have said no Ill do it later. But I thought I'm already here, Ive already spent twenty minutes in front of her naked, ten of those with an erection while she was handling my testicles. We had been talking all the time about sperm and how to help its production, looking after the testicles keeping them cool etc. So I just thought oh well, and got on with it.
At first, I felt it was more a case of her doing me a favour, allowing me time to produce the sample while she finished what she was doing at the computer, but I must say she did finish very quickly and then sat watching me until I ejaculated.

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[> [> [> Subject: Re: Most Of The Story Makes Sense, Except For...


Author:
Brianna
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Date Posted: 15:20:52 10/21/09 Wed

The fact that she sat there and watched you masturbate adds that little human detail that makes me believe your story. I would have done the same if given the opportunity. Most girls would.

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[> [> [> [> Subject: Re: Most Of The Story Makes Sense, Except For...


Author:
jean the frenchie
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Date Posted: 16:28:52 10/21/09 Wed

it was not a professional behaviour even if you were not upset by her presence

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[> [> [> [> [> Subject: Re: Most Of The Story Makes Sense, Except For...


Author:
Richard
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Date Posted: 02:54:40 10/24/09 Sat

Hmmm
When I had my preliminary exam at fertility clinic I was examined by a lady doctor. I did have to provide samples of my semen for lab analysis but this was done in advance and in private. I masturbated in the gents loos at the hospital so as to be sure that the sample was warm when it arrived.

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[> [> [> [> Subject: Re: Most Of The Story Makes Sense, Except For...


Author:
Peter
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Date Posted: 09:41:21 10/22/09 Thu

Yes Brianna from what you say, I guess looking back at my experience in front of the nurse, and being watched by her does seem a more human thing for her to do, be it unprofessional.
I know a couple of nurses that openly admit they will purposely view naked male patients. Its only natural to look at naked bodies.
As for turning me in to security Leah, maybe I should have turned her in! Nobody could just walk into the room she had locked the door, in fact I had trouble getting out.

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[> Subject: Briana, I'll Bet You Would Not Stay


Author:
Leah
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Date Posted: 07:30:01 10/22/09 Thu

I know you said you'd stay and watch, but if the scene really happened I'll bet you'd get out of there, even if you decided not to turn the man in to security.

You would be thinking about your own job status. What if someone popped in while this was going on? You'd be toast.
I doubt if you would take the risk of getting fired just so you could watch. Also, what would your family think? Or your boyfriend? Your colleagues?

You have a fantasy, but I'm sure you'd keep it that way.

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[> [> Subject: Re: Briana, I'll Bet You Would Not Stay


Author:
Brianna
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Date Posted: 15:16:36 10/22/09 Thu

How old are you, Leah? I don't know any girl my age who would even suspect someone would burst in on us, as you apparently would have. Why see problems where there are none? And even if she did, nothing would happen, except she might laugh later or I might prank her somehow myself later. It's not like that anymore, Leah.

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[> [> [> Subject: Work Colleagues Do Walk In Sometimes


Author:
Leah
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Date Posted: 08:03:29 10/24/09 Sat

Come on, you know very well that in most work environments, including the health care field, fellow employees often drop in after a quick tap on the door (maybe) and without waiting for an answer telling them it's ok to come in.

The colleague, upon seeing a man doing something so blatant would naturally gasp and maybe yell out spontaneously, even running for security help. The co-worker would naturally assume that the man was doing something you did not want him to do, at the very least.

Even if you managed to calm her (or him) down and explain that you ok'd the activity that was going on, how long do you think it would take the "rumor" to spread throughout the facility. It might eventually reach your superiors.

Even if none of this ever happened, and nobody saw what was going on, why would you take a chance like that? Yes, it was a favor to the client to let him give the sample while he was in the building, but why would it have to be done in the room with you at your desk watching? Can you imagine trying to explain yourself to your employers? Give us a break.

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[> [> [> [> Subject: Re: Work Colleagues Do Walk In Sometimes


Author:
Brianna
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Date Posted: 15:47:24 10/24/09 Sat

Hey, give US a break! Don't try to make it seem like everyone is as worried about sex as you are. Masturbation is a normal thing, and guys do it all the time. She was right to not be uptight about it, and just let him get on with it. You sound like you believe in ghosts, too, I bet!

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[> Subject: Re: Semen Samples


Author:
Travis
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Date Posted: 18:03:08 10/25/09 Sun

I am 36 and had to supply a semen sample.

The nurse gave me a cup, there were pono magazines.

I started to spank my monkey. After a few minutes, the door opened and it was a doctor. He said, I'm sorry, wrong patient and closed the door.

I was embarassed, at all. The doctor probably spanks his monkey now and then.

A minute later, I supplied the sample and gave it to the nurse.

Travis

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[> [> Subject: Re: Semen Samples


Author:
Billy
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Date Posted: 20:13:29 10/25/09 Sun

You are lucky the nurse didn't stay with you, otherwise when the doctor came in he would have thought there was 'monkey business' going on.

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[> [> Subject: Re: Semen Samples


Author:
VOR
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Date Posted: 19:13:56 10/26/09 Mon

No locks on the door?I never heard of a fertility clinic where the doors had no locks.The story is fantasy.

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[> [> [> Subject: Re: Semen Samples


Author:
Fastolff
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Date Posted: 17:58:01 07/09/11 Sat

Sorry to bust your bubble, but the one I went to did not have a lock on the "sample" room. I checked and would have used it if it was there.

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[> Subject: Re: Semen Samples


Author:
VOR
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Date Posted: 19:22:52 10/26/09 Mon



Billy writes:
I know of a case where the nurse actually masturbated him to get over with it quick after checking him. He said it didn't take long for him to come after a few flicks.



No billy, you DON'T know of a case where the nurse masturbated a guy.It just doesn't happen.

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[> [> Subject: Re: Semen Samples


Author:
DOR
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Date Posted: 23:17:08 10/26/09 Mon

VOR, you must be lving in a very secluded world with a very narrow mind to say that these things NEVER happened anywhere.

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[> [> [> Subject: Re: Semen Samples


Author:
VOR
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Date Posted: 19:18:42 10/27/09 Tue

Sure they happened somewhere....Like in fetish videos.People can witness it for themselves at a CFNM site.In the real world however,hospitals have standards.They have rules and regulations.

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[> [> [> [> Subject: Re: Semen Samples


Author:
tobias
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Date Posted: 15:07:40 04/09/10 Fri

VOR is right to be skeptical. The idea that a nurse would stay in the room while a patient masturbates is absurd, and I'm amazed that anyone would believe this story. I realize that some people WANT this to be true, but that doesn't make it true.

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[> Subject: Re: Semen Samples


Author:
Mike
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Date Posted: 11:33:59 04/08/10 Thu

In college, I donated sperm to a clinic for extra money. I was escorted into a room with magazines and masturbated in private. A little bit weird in that every person in the clinic knew what I was doing, but I got over it. After my vasectomy, I was asked to produce a sample to make sure I was "free and easy". I went into a bathroom stall and masturbated into the cup - that was weird in the sense that other people came in and out during. I just kept hoping nobody looked the cracks! But, never heard of doing it in front of nurse.

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[> [> Subject: Re: Semen Samples


Author:
Billy
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Date Posted: 17:44:52 04/08/10 Thu

I think doing it in front of a nurse is better and quicker than doing it with magazines hiding in a toilet stall. And she can also give you a hand if you are not in the mood of doing it.

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[> Subject: Re: Semen Samples


Author:
Jake
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Date Posted: 18:28:20 04/06/11 Wed

My wife and I are trying to conceive, so the fertility doctor suggested I do a simple semen analysis. I wanted to give a blunt description of my experience.

The collection was done at the reproductive services lab that our doctor is affiliated with. The lab itself had a small waiting area with 4 or 5 chairs and a dedicated receptionist.

After completing the necessary insurance and consent paperwork, followed by some slightly awkward small talk, the receptionist handed over a sterile sample cup. She walked me back from the waiting area to one of the collection rooms. It looked like there were 2 or 3 rooms in a row. She didn't give me much instruction, but showed me that there was a locked passage through the wall that the collection room shared with the lab (I'm assuming). She told me that after I was finished, I should put the cup in the passage, lock it, and bring out the key. Then she told me to read the instructions that were printed on the wall. And remember, just bring the key. With that, she was off.

The room itself looked like a small examination room, except with carpeted floors and a bathroom and a toilet off of the main room. There was a vinyl couch and a vinyl chair and they provided 2 folded and clean linens. There was a 13" TV/DVD that was cued up to some bad porn (including, no lie, a full 70s style porn-stach). They had one month-old copies of Playboy and Penthouse.

The directions for collection were not particularly clear. Don't touch inside the cup. Let someone know if you spill. Don't transfer spilled semen into the cup. The bathroom signs read "If you wash your hands or penis with soap, be sure to rinse completely. Soap kills sperm." OK. I figured I should wash my hands. Mine as well wash my penis. Liquid antibacterial soap dispenser on the wall, lathered up my penis. The sink was at a good height for rinsing, FYI. Washed and dried hands.

Next thing to figure out was position. I hadn't really thought about how best to get semen into a cup. I figured on my side, with my dominant arm up would be best. Laid out the sheet and assumed the position. Then I did my business. I'm afraid I bumped my penis into the cup a few times. I don't know how to position and hold the cup to catch everything reliably. What if you are planning on spurting but instead you just dribble? Is there some secret yoga-inspired downward dog position that works best?

Anyways, sample collected and into the locked passage. Washed up again and got dressed. Put my porn magazine back on the table, face-side down, like I found it. Headed out to drop of my key to the receptionist. Again, more awkward small talk.

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[> Subject: Re: Semen Samples


Author:
Amy
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Date Posted: 02:34:45 08/15/13 Thu

Im the nurse that sat in the room with Peter. I did because I thought it would be easier on him if I was there

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