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Date Posted: 18:19:32 04/16/00 Sun
Author: roopsi
Author Host/IP: NoHost / 149.43.165.225
Subject: last night and many others

Iím caught off-guard by these threats of desertion
though Iím sure I have the strength to call your bluff.

Weíre players in uninspiring scenes these days
as we affect accents and play stupid games
like seven-year old girls after school.

I canít keep up with you
and being swung around by the rope youíre using to strangle yourself
has never appealed to me.

And I canít turn away
though I need to:
some people call it masochism
but Iím merely confused.

So I take in a breath and remind myself that one day
this will all be over.

I stare straight ahead,
my jaw set firmly
and I donít take my eyes off the highway.

It isnít much of a highway,
but the high beams of three oncoming cars make it difficult to see.

Really, itís harder to look at you
out of the corner of my eye now,
waving the bottle of Southern Comfort
and swearing through tears that you actually like the taste.

And I wonder what Iím doing here,
driving carefully through the dark
with tired eyes that havenít seen sleep in several days.

You ask me to drive a little faster
because youíd like us to get back to your bed
and the Saranac in the fridge.

Again, I realize I donít belong here.

Itís nothing new.

I have this thought often.

But once in awhile,
it hits me harder.

And I turn on my high beams,
stare at the asphalt
and hope we reach Hamilton quickly.

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