Date Posted:20:39:36 01/19/06 Thu Author: Halzay(Elizabeth) Subject: Others won't think that it's possible to lose... In reply to:
S'peer - -Scarth
's message, "Some people figure they can never win." on 12:12:13 01/16/06 Mon
Halzay shrugged, frowning. “Well, if you remember, I used to be that way, too. I even believed Jolene when she said she just wanted to show me what between felt like,” It had been known around the Weyr they’d lived in—before the Flight—that Jolene of green Restoth had hated Halzay for finding favor in their Weyrlingmaster’s eyes. One of the biggest things that had happened, which even got the Weyrleaders involved, was when Halzay had been sick for the between lesson, and had been told to wait a few hours so that an adult could come teach her. Jolene, seizing her chance, had told her to hang onto her larger green, and she’d give her a taste of between, so that she’d know what to expect. Instead, she’d left the girl out in the middle of nowhere—and they’d had very many wherrie attacks lately. Halzay had been found about four hours later; the Weyrlingmaster had come minutes after Jolene had returned and got the truth out of her. It was still talk that Halzay hadn’t sought revenge at all. In fact, she’d forgiven her readily.
She listened to the next part, all the while forcing herself to stay calm. She wouldn’t betray Elaini. She couldn’t betray Elaini… “Has… has anyone ever hurt him that bad?” She was trying to be casual, but her voice shook slightly. Let it look like I am simply worried for W’ntyr, she willed to herself. Let him think I am just worried. Of course, as he hadn’t said the part about W’ntyr’s girl sleeping with another man, Halzay didn’t know exactly how deep in trouble Elaini was. “I mean, really… Elaini loves him more than life itself—as much as Rishanath, if possible. Could she…I mean, if she loves him so much, and he’s so devoted to her and the kids, there can’t possibly be any reason under Rukbat they would split up…” she trailed off, and sighed. “Sorry. Still can’t get over the fact that they got into a fight. I know Elaini, and it shard near killed her.”
Ever since she was little, Halzay had been loved and used the word love freely. She loved Elaini, Salzay, her brothers and sister, her niece Cara (and she had suspicion that there were even more nieces and nephews she hadn’t met)… everyone close to her. In fact, if it was brought up, S’peer had made such an impact, and she was trying so hard to forgive him...she loved him, too, in a way. Otherwise she’d have transferred by now, right? In any case, she knew love, and which love was “the one for me” love, “you make me feel good about myself” love, and even just “I don’t really hate you, so…” She was probably the best at knowing her own emotions, really, when it came to affection.
{What I meant by ‘abnormal’,} Lizzie answered softly, {Was that our riders are behaving curiously. Most girls don’t hold anything back in a flight, but somehow Hal got through me. Most guys either aren’t too bothered or are able to make the girl calm. Not yours. Most foster off their “unwanted”} she put a lot of stress on the word to show she meant “unplanned”, {children…Hal won’t, yours doesn’t seem keen on it. Then add in there that, even though Hal left yours because she felt raped, they’re acting almost like friends now. The circumstances? Greens fly, riders mate, even if they’re unwilling. Our two? Complete dimglows at times.} She paused. {But, yes...let’s be glad of this. Hal can get over her fear, if yours can get over his. He still seems nervous around mine.}
