| Subject: Re: Advice |
Author:
EggHead
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Date Posted: 20:44:18 10/12/20 Mon
In reply to:
Rental Mom
's message, "Advice" on 10:20:15 10/12/20 Mon
I think you've already had a lot of very sound advice, and I'm not sure what I can add to it, but here are my couple of pennies anyway.
IMO you should have a good long talk with Amanda and ask her if she is sure, REALLY sure, that she wants you to spank her as an alternative to eviction. If she answers in the affirmative, then make it clear to her that any spanking you give her will not be a light matter. It will hurt a lot. She will be a very sorry young lady by the time you're done with her. Does she really feel it would be worth all that pain, and buckets of tears, to avoid being evicted?
Would this spanking be a one-off, or the start of many? Perhaps to test just how willing she is, raise the possibility that she could be spanked again after the first one. Tell her that whenever she breaks your rules, particularly with things like getting drunk or high, you will spank her again. So she's not just making a deal on a one-off spanking to get out of being evicted. She would be agreeing to a new kind of life if she stays on. Again, ask her if she feels it's worth it. And remind her that she is an adult, so she can choose to refuse the spanking and find somewhere else to live. But equally, she can consent to being spanked. This is all about her choices, though she has to live with the consequences of whatever decision she makes.
Do you use methods of discipline other than spanking with your daughters? E.g. time-outs, grounding, temporary suspension of privileges, confiscation of phones or some other favourite object? Or what about extra chores? If so, could any of those work with Amanda instead? Maybe raise that as a possible option and see how she feels about it. Perhaps don't make it just a matter of spanking vs. eviction. See how she might feel about other kinds of penalties vs. eviction instead.
I don't know exactly what Amanda's motives are for requesting a spanking from you (other than the obvious one of desperation to avoid eviction). There could well be a sexual element to her request. This is why I think you should emphasise to her how unpleasant the spanking will be and how additional spankings could be a possibility. This is not just going to be an experiment to satisfy her curiosity. It's going to be a very unpleasant experience that could be repeated at some stage. However, people's interest in spanking can be quite multi-layered or multi-faceted. Certainly, mine is. I am perfectly happy to acknowledge that I have a sexual interest in it. However, depending on the context, sometimes I find it just plain intellectually stimulating to discuss it (especially when "thrashing out" rights and wrongs of in certain situations).
And while the thought of going over a lady's lap for a spanking has immense erotic appeal for me, there is another aspect of spanking that appeals to me in a completely non-sexual way: the thought of being accountable to someone for my actions. The idea of suffering unpleasant consequences for specific bad or wrong choices I make. My mother often spanked me unjustly (if you have read any of my other posts, you'll know what I mean). So if I ever choose to get a discipline-type spanking rather than a "funishment" or play spanking, it would be very important for me that it be truly warranted. Then it would be far less about getting my rocks off and more about a kind of "absolution for sin".
Now, Amanda may well have some sort of longing for firm boundaries and accountability in her life. Perhaps her parents are quite permissive. Conversely, they may be really strict, so now she's out on her own, she has been wanting to make the most of her new-found freedoms. But she is starting to learn that being able to do whatever you like isn't all it's cracked up to be. She might be figuring out that having some structure and limits isn't such a bad thing after all. So it may be that on some level, she feels that being spanked will give her that accountability she's been missing. It's entirely possible that she may have a sexual interest, but also genuinely desire a sense of accountability. In other words, multi-faceted motives.
In any case though, communication is really, really important in this situation. Make sure that as far as possible, Amanda understands exactly what she is potentially letting herself in for. But also be clear that she does have the option to walk away at any time. Personally, I wouldn't talk to her parents. Amanda is over legal age, so you don't need their permission to spank her. Let Amanda talk to them herself, if she wants to. As an adult, she has to stand on her own two feet. If she is truly committed to getting a spanking from you, that's a call she has to make. It's not for her parents to decide. She has to make her own decisions and then live with the consequences.
Anyway, I hope this has been of some help and that you and Amanda will be able to work out a solution that everyone is happy with (even if that solution "ends in tears" for Amanda over your lap!).
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