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Subject: Bonding or Alienating

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Date Posted: 06:58:57 09/17/21 Fri

Hi all,

I've been reading posts on here for a while and am so grateful to those who have shared their thinking and experiences. It's wonderful that we have this space to discuss the important topic of how best to discipline our children.

I was talking to a non-spanking mom friend the other day and the conversation moved to the subject of discipline. I don't try and persuade other moms to spank and am generally quiet and discrete about my views. Unprompted this mom said that she thought spanked children must hate their parents for disciplining them in that manner and that made me think.

In my experience, both as a woman who as a child was soundly and frequently spanked and as a mom I think loving discipline builds the bond between parent and child rather than alienate them from us. Despite my own mother using her hand, spoon and hair brush very thoroughly I never hated her after I'd been spanked. There was a point early on in most of my spankings when I could be defiant and even angry but that was soon spanked out of me and my attitude was changed for the better by mom's spankings.

I sense the same in my own children, there are definite stages to the spanking and at a point they do become more accepting although no less noisey or animated. I'm not cruel but I do make sure that my spankings hurt and that they are thorough and teach a lesson.

I find my children are actually closer to me after a spanking and clearly don't harbour any resentment. They know that if they misbehave they will be soundly spanked and if they don't they will avoid spankings.

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Subject Author Date
Re: Bonding or AlienatingMary10:41:29 09/17/21 Fri
Bonding if lovingMarkW13:08:06 09/17/21 Fri
Re: Bonding or AlienatingMaria B.14:29:52 09/17/21 Fri
Re: Bonding or AlienatingShannon04:12:03 09/18/21 Sat
Bonding - Love at first spank.Bridget15:27:43 09/18/21 Sat
Re: Bonding or AlienatingStevenT15:27:06 09/20/21 Mon
Bonding ExperienceVanessa (Abel’s Mom)22:08:48 09/20/21 Mon

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