Karen's Memorial -- LKH Anita Blake Series

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Date Posted: 07:18:36 04/15/12 Sun
Author: Fiona
Subject: Karen's Memorial

Yesterday was a tough day but it was really nice to have a chance to celebrate Karen's life with her family and friends. Lallybroch was well represented with about 25 of us there. There was a lovely memorial bookmark with two quotes from the books. There were beautiful pictures everywhere. I don't think that girl ever took a bad photo!! Lots from the Fergus festival, including one with Diana and Doug. Hedy, your sampler had pride of place among the pictures. "Fuck Cancer". Her roller Derby skates and shirts were there as well. Thom spoke first saying Karen had asked him to deliver the message about her cancer having nothing to do with smoking or second hand smoke but traceable to spraying of "Agent" defoliants near an army base she once lived on. After that, anyone who wanted could get up and talk. Helene and JP both got up and spoke about getting to know Karen through the boards etc and both did a beautiful job. No way could I have stopped sobbing long enough to saw anything at that point. Keira had arranged for a lovely flower arrangement to be delivered with the donations she had received towards it with a card from the Ladies of Lallybroch. It sat behind the podium. Right beside it was the "Ugly Duncan" highlander mug which Thom promises he will bring to the big party we are having for Karen the Friday night if Fergus this year and she would like us all to drink some single malt out of it. ;). There were so many stories about Karen's kindness, how she had gone out of her way to help others, just what a terrific person she was. There were so many people there that they spilled out filling the bar next door and then the room had to be expanded by removing one of those bendy walls so that everyone could fit! 15 of us then went up to the Brew House in Fergus and had a late lunch and raised a glass or two in Karen's memory.

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[> So glad there was a contigent there to represent all of her 'online friends'...I had her (and all of you) in my thoughts all day yesterday. I am SO upset we never made it to Fergus, Had sort of been playing around with having a 'Hoser summer' next year....GFM and Fergus. I'm still thinking about it but, I gotta admit, Karen was someone I REALLY wanted to finally meet in person. Karen and I bonded over the fact we both lived in Orromocto NB (CFB Gagetown) when we were kids...and she was the first person I contacted when my father told me about the Agent Orange, Purple and White spraying that they did there for almost 30 years. Inside >>>I kinda ranted a bit... --

Ceilidh/Christine, 09:42:55 04/15/12 Sun

When she got her first diagnosis and posted it on the Kirk that last thing she said was "Ceilidh, do you think this has anything to do with Oromocto" and I immediately shot her an email telling her it most definitely did and kept at her to get her name on 'the list' even though she wasn't there for the 'right' years of 66&67 (she moved there in 68). On top of the list of 'eligible illnesses'?? "respiratory cancer (of the lung/bronchus, larynx or trachea)"

People are wasting away and dying all over Canada because this stuff was sprayed like RAIN over the fields and woods...and I have seen pictures of kids PLAYING on the empty barrels--that people also used for garbage and burn barrels. I was incensed about the AO before...but now it's taken a friend...and it scares me every day that I was exposed to that sh!t too. I was born there in 1971....they sprayed from the late 50s into the 80s...my mother lived there during the 50s and 60s and dad moved there in the 60s.

It took a friend all too soon...and she will not be forgotten

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[> Really glad y'all got to go. She was on my mind all yesterday. I'm still so stunned and saddened by it. It seems like Thom and Kellye are doing well considering. Hugs to one and all ! <3 -- Tam, 10:16:08 04/15/12 Sun

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[> Thanks for sharing Fiona...thought about all of you and Thom, Cora and her kids all day. Its going to be hard to just carry on... --

BetsyG, 10:27:27 04/15/12 Sun

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[> D'oh! How could I forget that Joyce made the most beautiful picture for Thom. It was a collage of little bits of all the toasting pictures from Facebook with a castle etc. Very beautiful!! -- Fiona, 20:05:33 04/15/12 Sun

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[> Not a regular on this board but felt a great need to speak up. Our Lallyangel Karen's celebration of life was sad, tearful and beautiful. Seeing that huge number of people from all over and related to her in so many ways was overwhelming. Thom was so composed and warmly welcoming to all. Amazing! I feel so fortunate to have known her and benefited from her humor, total honesty and charismatic personality. Attending a funeral/life service (for me) has always made the loss of a loved one feel real. In this case, I feel a sense of acceptance - less anger and even less sorrow - knowing she is truly in a good place and watching over those who loved her and those she truly loved back. . JMHO. --

CathyS, 21:12:51 04/15/12 Sun

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[> [> Thanks for coming by and I'm so glad you were able to attend. Feel free to drop by anytime --

Cherie, 14:52:19 04/16/12 Mon

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oh wow - -- no words - again! Thankful that FFF and LOL were represented so well since she was so well loved by so many in these communities. -- Hedy, 11:05:30 04/16/12 Mon

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[> [> Would you believe I got through talking to Thom and Kellye and the hosers we met there, the beautiful photos, her memorial card with the quotes from Diana and seeing that sampler was what made me start crying. It was just so Karen. :( -- Fiona, 12:27:03 04/16/12 Mon

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[> Oh Fiona...... thanks so much for telling us about it in such detail. I dont know how JP and Helene could do it, so glad they could!!!!!! Thanks also for filling us in how Thom was, I was worried about him. I cant believe that Dunkie mug was there......... I put that put a smile on some of your faces, lighten the mood a bit. So sweet of Joyce to do! Miss you Karen..... Love to all! -- M&M, 13:07:38 04/16/12 Mon

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[> Thanks, Fiona!!!! I was away this weekend and was really hoping someone would post. I'm so happy that so many of our group could make it. We were staying at our friend's cabin with pretty basic TV and Saturday night one channel had Lord of the Rings, Return of the King. Everyone else went to bed and I watched all by myself thinking of Karen and how much we loved and used to talk about those movies and how much we loved us some Viggo. Quite the coincidence on the day of her memorial. I haven't watched those movies in years and definitely not on TV. And there were hardly any commercials either so you know there was some divine intervention going on. *g* -- Jodi YoB, 13:38:22 04/16/12 Mon

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[> [> Peggy mentioned that it was on and she had the same thoughts as you. --

Cherie, 14:53:18 04/16/12 Mon

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[> [> [> Well, you know, of the three movies that could have been shown........there is that shocking ending in ROTK where Frodo still so young (for a hobbit) just can't go on any longer and stuns his friends by sailing to the undying lands. Maybe Karen was telling us she's alright. I hope so. -- Jodi YoB, 20:41:32 04/16/12 Mon

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[> [> [> [> Oh, and the fact that I can't remember the last time I watched TV on a Saturday night, let alone was in front of one and that was pretty much the only thing to watch. *g* -- Jodi YoB, 20:43:24 04/16/12 Mon

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[> Thank you so much Fiona. I'm so glad there was so many that were able to make it. I had a moment on Saturday too. I picked up my phone to call someone and when I unlocked my phone my contacts were open and it was on Karen's. It made me smile. --

Cherie, 14:49:50 04/16/12 Mon

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[> Thanks so much for the update, Fiona! Also, great to know that Lallybroch was so well represented. God bless Thom and that whole family! -- Merc, 14:52:33 04/16/12 Mon

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[> What a well-loved woman! I'm glad that there we so many of our friends in attendance to celebrate her life. -- Denise, 18:53:10 04/16/12 Mon

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[> It was amazing how many people were there. At one point a little lady with white hair approached me and told me she was Karen's Aunt Wilhemine Travis and asked who I was. When I told her my name, she immediately asked "Who are you married to?"!! Later, Karen's Uncle Wayne Travis got up to speak. At some point he asked for all of the Travis' to raise their hands. Of course everyone from Lallybroch turns to me and tells me to raise my hand, which I did but it was pretty funny because I was a lot less "tan" than all the rest of the raised hands!>>> -- Colly, 19:21:53 04/16/12 Mon

Way back, before the Hosed baby shower, I received an email from Karen, introducing herself and explaining that her maiden name was Travis also. I fired back an email that said something to the effect that we could be long lost cousins. Her response was something along the lines of "I don't think so because I'm black". I replied that anything was possible and i wasn't going to discount the idea. She then explained that her Travis family took their name from the plantation where they were slaves. They escaped through the Underground Railroad and went through Detroit into Canada. (If memory serves me right). I think we pretty much always called each other "Cuz" after that. That was how I introduced her and how I described her in photos. Fast forward to when Lily Rose was born...and Karen emailed us with her name. Well, my great grandmother's name was Lily Rose Travis. I joked that Kellye had picked a good family name. I'm pretty sure Karen just shook her head. Our Travis' are known for their blue eyes. Myself, my grandpa, my uncle and great grandfather all have/had blue eyes. I was told all my life that I have my Grandpa Travis' blue eyes. I used to joke with Karen that Lily had Travis blue eyes...she used to say they didn't come from her Travis'! When Karen posted the baby picture of herself she mentioned that it was taken in Chatham Ontario. That rang a bell with me but I didn't figure it out for a while. I was skimming through some family tree stuff when I realized that my great great grandmother Phoebe Kingshott, who married a Travis, was born in Chatham. At that point I told Karen that I was going to prove a connection...she said the most I was likely to find was that her family was "volunteering on my families farm". I haven't been able to find much more information and Phoebe moved to Michigan at the age of 2 and met my great great grandfather there. What a coincidence though.

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[> [> "volunteering"....LOL!!!!!!! That's so funny, yeah, she always called you Cuz when she talked about you and got a real kick out of why. Here's my coincidence with her....we met when we both answered a call for trivia volunteers at LOL when we both first arrived. So did 2 others so there were 5 of us in total and the other three were wing nuts so once trivia was over we were glad to set out on our own friendship. Anyway, on my email it came up with my married last name which is Willcocks. She emails me back and says, this is so funny, I live in Ajax on Willcocks street, what a coincidence. And I say, you don't know the half of it, DH was born in Ajax. It was all so spooky funny. We were meant to meet obviously. -- Jodi YoB, 20:30:07 04/16/12 Mon

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[> [> LOL I never heard that story before! That Chatham connection is a bit close,............... hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm! -- M&M, 08:02:40 04/17/12 Tue

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[> [> Interesting, Colly! I hadn't heard all of these details before either. -- Merc, 08:37:08 04/17/12 Tue

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[> [> Love the "Cuz Connection"! Very cool Colly! So glad you shared - thank you! -- hedy, 11:01:39 04/17/12 Tue

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[> [> Colly thanks for sharing the whole story! I hope you write it out for Kellye and Thom too! You really have discovered a real cuz link! --

BetsyG, 20:31:18 04/17/12 Tue

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[> What a wonderful family we've all become, eh? So glad you were there to tell Karen, "see ya later." I really hope that will be true. Very glad we are going to be getting together with you and Jeff and Thom in 12 sleeps!!! :-) He is bringing the Dunc Mug!! --

CarolE, 22:38:10 04/16/12 Mon

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[> [> Like button! and then me down the road! --

BetsyG, 20:32:11 04/17/12 Tue

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[> [> ;) -- Fiona, 21:02:01 04/17/12 Tue

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[> I haven't even been able to post about Karen but I've read everything and think about her a lot. -- M.F., 02:01:05 04/18/12 Wed

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[> I remember meeting her at Surrey and she commented later that she was nervous about coming as she would be the only black person there. That really stunned me, I hadn't seen her colour until she pointed it out to me. I really hope that is the last time she ever thought about it with any of our online community. -- PD, 10:42:00 04/18/12 Wed

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[> [> I'm still choking upand crying whenever I think of or talk about her. PD, I never saw it either. I mean, I knew her color, but she was just my friend. There is no color there. Val L. made a comment at the memorial that we all have gotten to know each from the inside out, instead of the outside in, and that if we all had lived on the same block we might never have become the friends we are now. I would hape we would have anyway, but what an amazing journey the internet has taken us on. -- Maria, 17:58:59 04/18/12 Wed

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[> [> It's a shame that Karen would have even thought that she might encounter prejudice, though I'm sure everyone at Surrey welcomed her with open arms. I remember when we had a fun guessing game on S&S, matching baby and childhood photos to the present-day person and Karen said she was like the free square on Hollywood Squares since everyone would match her photos without hesitation. She was funny! -- Denise, 10:44:25 04/19/12 Thu

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[> [> [> LOL! Love that - "free square" - that's so our Karen! -- Hedy, 14:06:53 04/19/12 Thu

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