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Date Posted: 02:38:15 05/09/12 Wed
Author: .....
Subject: It's Harmy Awards Time!

Were here at the Manly Arms Hotel and its almost time for the Harmy Award Presentations! A red carpet, drenched in drool, is being unrolled. Slowly a limousine (actually a big a$$ blue van) rolls up and a large group of perfect size 6 ladies climb out, their blue boas scattering feathers into the air. Babbling phrases like "a girl can't get enough of a good thing" and "come to me, you know the reason, they teeter on their stilettos and disappear inside the hotel. On the red carpet, Jane Rivermouth frantically waves a microphone at the arriving guests and loudly declares that blue is not the "in" color this year.

Inside the hotel, the group of ladies stop and stare. Many of the newcomers have never been to the Manly Arms before. Even for those who remember the dream fantasy nights of long ago at the hotel, it still is a wonderful sight today. And of course everyones attention immediately locks onto the lifesize naked statue of Harm in the lobby, anatomically correct of course. Everyone swarms around the statue, swooning and fondling carefully. I had no idea that CW was. . . ..well . . . . usmgrad gulps, trying to find the right descriptive words. Do you think we could make a fanfic challenge about it?

Ladies, please, do not drool on the statue! Well damage it and get arrested and have to pay for it. . . .him. . . .something, and I dont think Bubba has any bail money. Hes saving it for the Texas Tarts Jagfest in June, Araninda wails, frantically trying to restore order. Hey, Lee, stop squeezing Harms six. . . .er, I mean the back side of the statue.

But no one is paying Araninda any attention, so she steps up on a nearby crate to make herself more visible. Suddenly a big black furry paw appears out of the top of the crate and grabs her around the ankle. She starts shrieking in fright: "No. . .it just cant be. . . The ladies reluctantly turn away from the statue in time to see the sides of the crate slowly falling away. Sure enough, sitting there calmly eating bananas and rewriting scripts is a 500-pound gorilla. "Shoo, Araninda shouts, trying to wave him away like an annoying insect. But the gorilla lasted through nine years of shippers trying to get rid of him and he isn't going quietly now. Instead he stands up, beats his chest and bellows: "I am the Ghost of Gorilla Past. I will be in the room until the last 7.5 minutes of your award show.

"Oh, Pukeovic! Araninda exclaims, using a favorite HarmyBoard expletive. Sigh! Not the way she had planned to start the 2012 Harmy Awards. But it sure is fun to be back at the Manly Arms where anything can and does happen.

Please stay tuned for the presentations which will be presented in separate threads over the next few weeks. Votes have been tallied and certified by the accounting firm of Clark Palmer Accomplices (CPA). Any bribe money that exchanged hands in the tallying of the votes has been deposited in the Harmon Rabb Swiss Bank Account along with a paper clip. Oh yes, the most important part we will also announce the person who nominated the winner in each category and that person will get an evening with Harm.

So, ladies, please check in if you are attending the awards ceremonies. We want to hear from everyone who is with us here at the Manly Arms!

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Replies:

[> Would be nice to win something!!! -- Katiegirl, 05:28:19 05/09/12 Wed


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[> So clever, Araninda!! I'll be waiting. -- jenks, 06:36:58 05/09/12 Wed


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[> LOL - looking forward to a wonderful time in Manly Arms - hmm, CW challenge, that could be a hard one, better hold it for one of the longer months! -- usmgrad, 07:03:54 05/09/12 Wed


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[> [> LOL! GRABB! -- Araninda, 12:01:42 05/09/12 Wed


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[> This is my RSVP to the awards. -- fananicfan, 09:24:09 05/09/12 Wed


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[> Agree, very clever! -- doc, 10:45:23 05/09/12 Wed


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[> Awesome... I just arrived at the Manly Arms... can't wait to see the statue! -- Dee, 11:34:55 05/09/12 Wed


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[> Here's my RSVP!! Can't wait to get to the Manly Arms!! Nice job Araninda! -- Cathy F. waving at Jenks and waiting patiently for our lunch date., 11:35:30 05/09/12 Wed


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[> And the dress code is ? You know, blue boa, does not flatter my skin tone. -- Sova, 12:20:07 05/09/12 Wed


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[> Well, you already know that I'm here. I was just massaging Harm's "cheeks"! LOL -- Lee - Arianda, that was a fantastic intro. LOL, 13:32:24 05/09/12 Wed


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[> [> I assume you mean his "posterior cheeks..." -- jenks-waving right back at you, Cathy F., 14:45:15 05/09/12 Wed


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[> [> [> Yup, they're so round and firm and smooth... LOL -- Lee, 00:21:52 05/11/12 Fri


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[> Having visited the Manly Arms many years ago, I am delighted to learn they have added the statue ! -- Sunny, 13:47:04 05/09/12 Wed


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[> [> Welcome back, Sunny! We have missed you! -- Araninda, 16:52:08 05/09/12 Wed


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[> Great Job Araninda so bring it on. -- Brooke, 14:24:15 05/09/12 Wed


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[> I'm here! I'm here! Wouldn't miss this for the world! -- Deemus, 20:04:57 05/09/12 Wed


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[> Great intro Araninda! -- jan, 20:45:40 05/09/12 Wed


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[> Very clever--can't wait! -- Shazam, 01:30:04 05/10/12 Thu


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[> The flight from London may be delayed, but count me in! LOL! -- mj, 07:16:28 05/10/12 Thu


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[> Awesome, looking forward to the presentation! -- Sunset, 14:50:08 05/10/12 Thu


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[> Your intro is just what I needed this afternoon. Am in the midst of packing up the household to make the move back to my 'roots'. Now, Araninda, dear, please request all hands to remove their hands from the statute -- 'cause when I get there, I want the big guy all to myself. Now, about the blue boas, thought the color blue was always 'in'.?.?. -- carramor, 15:30:04 05/10/12 Thu


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[> Well imo, Araninda deserves the biggest award. Araninda, you rock! -- Cece, 16:03:32 05/10/12 Thu


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[> [> A toast to Araninda! Here! Here! -- Lee, 18:45:06 05/10/12 Thu


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[> [> I agree! -- manette, 15:25:49 05/12/12 Sat


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[> Well, I'm reeeaaalllyyy late checking in, but I'm here and I'm LOLing at this hilarious post! I can't wait to see what else I've missed! -- JAG Junkie (Ronda)--Where has all my time gone lately?, 21:22:27 05/13/12 Sun


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