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[> Subject: Re: EXPLAIN FIRST ENEMA
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Author:
Glen
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Date Posted: 08:12:34 04/30/09 Thu
I actually faced this dilemma several years ago.
Here is how I solved it!
Infants, and one or two-year olds are going to cry when given an enema. Not a lot you can do about that, except just use suppositories whenever possible at that age.
Once they get to 3 or 4, however they understand enough that most of the crying can be avoided.
My girlfriend dumped my daughter on me when the daughter was just a few weeks short of her third birthday, and was never seen again.
I had to fight her parents for custody.
When my daughter was 5, the custody battle was coming to a head. It was stressful for both of us.
We had already had a bad experience with a glycerin suppository about 3 months earlier, when she was still 4.
She got rather severely constipated, and given the experience we had already had with suppositories, I really didn’t have a lot of options. I had to face reality. I had to give her an enema.
I just took the time and explained to her exactly what was going to happen before I even started. I explained that the Epsom Salt was a medicine that was made to make a person poop. I also explained that the soapsuds would be something her insides did not like having in them, and it would make them want to push the soap out. The soap, water and Epsom Salt would all be mixed going in. The Epsom Salt would cause the poop to break up into smaller pieces, and the water would make those pieces softer. The soapsuds would make them more slippery so that they come out easier.
The bulb I used was an old red 4-ounce bulb with a child's nozzle that my mother had bought for use on us as babies and almost never used. It was never used on me until I discovered it and played with it at age 6 or 7.I had “borrowed” it as a Teenager, and never given it back.
I showed her the bulb, told her that I knew it was a little scary looking, but it was not something to be afraid of. I also let her handle it, with no water in it and even squeeze it a little. I explained how the water went into the bulb, and how it would come out of the bulb inside her, and why it stays in the bulb until I squeeze. I then explained to her that it was not something to play with, it had a serious purpose, and it was to be used only for that. Since it goes inside a person, it is important to keep it clean and dry when it's not being used.
I explained the knee-chest position and how to stay in it. I also let her know it was OK to put a pillow under the knees, if she wanted to.
Then I explained how the whole procedure would work. I told her that I was going to have to stick the black part in her bottom, and squeeze. I promised to take it slow. I also explained that the whole reason for the hard tube was to get the fluid past the muscles she could control, and into a part of her inside where she had no control over what was going on. She would not be able to do anything to stop or slow down the water mixture. It was important that she cooperate, and relax- no fighting back, it will feel weird, but fighting back was not going to stop it. I explained that, if she tried to keep it out, or push back, that is exactly what makes it hurt!! I also explained that, while this would not be any fun for either of us, it was not something there was a way to avoid. Neither of us was going to like it at all, but there was nothing else to do. I also explained that it was better not to wait any longer, we needed to just get through it, together, the best way we could!
I also told her that I would be as gentle as I knew how to be. I could not completely promise that it would not hurt at all, but, if we both got everything right, the hurt would not be much, or last for long. It might be enough to make her say "Ow ow ow" a few times, but not enough to make her cry. If it hurt enough to make her cry, one or the other of us made a booboo.
I told her that the first bulb was likely to cause a feeling of fullness, and possibly an urge to poop. After I start the second bulb is when she needs to talk to me, and tell me when she doesn't think she can take any more. It is also very important to keep the enema fluid in until she can't keep it in any more. The longer she can keep it in, the more the medicine will work, and the easier the next round will be. She also needs to stay in that funny position until she just has to poop, and can’t hold it any more. I explained that, if she was not sure she could hold it, she should take deep breaths, and I showed her how, and let her try deep breathing a time or two. It would make things a little easier if she could take a deep breath when I start to squeeze the bulb.
I also told her to let me know if she was not sure she would make it to the toilet, so I could carry her, but, if she thought she could make it on her own, it would be better if she would run to the toilet on her own.
I told her that, once she was on the toilet, she should relax as much as she could, and let it all come out of her. It is OK to push gently, but no hard pushing, because it only makes things harder, and can hurt her insides. There was a small chance she may throw up. Most likely it won't happen, but she needed to tell me if she felt like she was going to throw up.
I also told her that she would have to stay on the toilet for a while, because she would have to poop a lot of times, and she would be a little surprised at how much came out, and how fast the poop would try to come out. There would not be enough time in between poops to get off the toilet and make it back, and the poop could come on so fast, she would not have time to get back.
Once the pooping has stopped, she needed to go to the bed and lie down and relax for a while. After that, we would do the same thing again, and that we would have to keep doing it until she could hold it for a while and get the fluid out looking the same as when it went in, with no poop in it. At that time she would be done and could go back to normal as soon as she felt good enough.
I also explained that an enema is something many kids and grown-ups use, and that it has been used forever. It is, however something that most people are more than a little embarrassed about, and not something we talk about with our friends. It is just one of those private, quiet things that no one else needs to know about.
I let her watch as I mixed the enema.
She asked me if I had ever had an enema. I told her that I had used the bag many times. I explained that, as you get a little older, the hot water bottle she had seen me use for knee pain would come with a set of hoses and clamps, and a bigger pipe that was made for grown-ups. When Dad needs an enema that setup is used, but she was too young for any thing like that. Even if she had been a little older, I don't think I would have used it for the first enema ever, because it was just too scary-looking. I held the bulb up next to her tummy, then I got out the 3qt bag I use, filled it with water and held it next to my tummy, just to let her visualize the difference between an adult and a children's enema.
It was summer, and she was wearing a sundress with only flip-flops, so I told her to take off her flip-flops and panties and get on the bed. I helped her into position.
Once I got her to hold still, it went pretty well. I repeated the whole explanation as we went along, and explained that the dryness in her mouth was a normal side-effect of the Epsom Salt, and just generally took it slow, and explained as well as I could what was going to happen next.
I got 3 bulbs into her for the first round. She held that one almost 8 minutes! 2 bulbs on the second round, Which she held four minutes, on the third round she took 4 without Epsom Salt, just soapsuds, and 4 on the fourth round. The fourth round came out clear.
She did not cry EVEN ONCE!! I told her she had done great!
What I didn’t tell her for another 10 years is that it was so much easier than the first enema I had given to her Mother while we were dating. Her Mom cried, she didn't! By the time I told her that, she was 14, and was self-administering!
She has now graduated from College, she has had enemas through the years, and still uses them.
So you see, an enema done gently, with a lot of explanation, and a lot of love does not have to be a crying fit, or a traumatic experience, at all!!
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Re: EXPLAIN FIRST ENEMA