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Wednesday, April 24, 19:19:37

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Subject: update! Author: missy (sill confused) [ Next Thread | Previous Thread | Next Message | Previous Message ] Date Posted: 05/25/07 7:15pm Hi guys, thanks for the responses and advice.update- im still wirling around like a tornedo.i took some advice and began some journaling(which i wrote so much it gave me writters cramp).i went to my first prenatal apt which after discussing this with my DR she didnt continue the visit and sent me to speak to a social worker,who as well as you all suggested set me up with a pregnancy crisis sort of thing. went there today to talk with someone,which i think was somewhat helpful,i mean noone is doing or can do what im looking for,which is give me a answer. But i could hear alot of answers in myself as i spoke with them and i also noticed that the most of my worry was my own self doubt, could i do this alone at 35? could i be a good parent like i was to my daughter? am i guarenteed i could love this child like a parents suppose to? would i love him or her as much as i love my daughter,being that im not in love with the father? Would i enjoy all the things i enjoyed doing with my child when she was small?so many questions that may sound outragious but it was more about me, and not the dad as i thought was the main factor to my mess. i just pray for some relief in this confused mind of mine, i will keep u updated, thanks again [ Next Thread | Previous Thread | Next Message | Previous Message ]

Replies:

[> Subject: Re: update! Author: Pat [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 05/26/07 12:24pm Hi, Missy, Of course you can do it! You are a lot stronger than you think. You are 35, and you have been successfully raising your daughter all these years. I am glad that you are discovering answers. It is important to let your mind work this through. Initially, you feel panic or fear. You need to get past that point, before you will think clearly. It sounds like you are getting there. I am a fairly new grandmother. Do I enjoy the things my grandchildren are interested in? To begin with, I didn't feel that way very much, but as I spend more time with them, I am more interested in what they are interested in, and more I want to have a relationship with them. Now keep in mind I have no help from hormones like you will. Your child is a separate human being from her father. The choice you face is not whether to be a mother or not, but whether to be a mother to a living child or not. Think about how you will react later, when you start to think, at your leisure, about the choice you made. Given your background, this isn't going to be as easy as it might be, but you can work it through, and we will be here for you. You are in our prayers. Hugs, Pat

[> Subject: Re: update! Author: Tracey [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 05/26/07 1:47pm Hi Missy! I know you feel such confusion right now, but I just want to let you know that I am praying for clarity and strength for you as you weed through all these jumbled thoughts and emotions. You are stronger than you think, Missy. I think the fact that you are in such turmoil over this says alot! Listen to your heart.... God bless, Tracey

[> Subject: Re: update! Author: Shellie [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 05/26/07 5:19pm Hi Missy, It's normal to wonder if you can love this child. It's normal to fell like you can't "start all over". But, like others have said: Most women do not regret their child. In contrast, many women regret their abortion. Here's a couple of stories from women who have aborted: http://www.abortionconcern.org/stories/index.php?storytype=repeat Also, having more than one abortion can cause even more guilt. I hope you can overcome your fears and know your new little one. I will post again, later. Thanks for updating..and please do continue to do so. Shellie

[> Subject: Re: update! ---A link that works!--- Author: Shellie [ Edit | View ] Date Posted: 05/26/07 11:44pm Sorry, that link didn't work. Here it is again: http://www.abortionconcern.org/stories/index.php?storytype=repeat Shellie