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Subject: Re: Unplanned pregnancy... Freaking out... please help


Author:
luka
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Date Posted: 07/14/06 4:36am
In reply to: Jon 's message, "Unplanned pregnancy... Freaking out... please help" on 07/14/06 12:21am

Firstly your girlfriend needs to take a test to see if she is in fact pregnant. Being late for a period does not allways equal pregnancy. You can get a urine pregnancy test kit from a chemist and they are not expensive. No point in worrying untill you have all of the information. I think it's really cool that you are willing to stick by your girlfriend and i commend you on your strength of character and willingness to take resopnsibilty if in fact she is pregnant. Please do let us know what the test result is and if she is pregnant there are lots of wonderful women on this board who can lead you in the right direction.

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[> Subject: Re: Unplanned pregnancy... Freaking out... please help


Author:
Melanie
[Edit]

Date Posted: 07/14/06 4:52am


First things first: Has she had a pregnancy test? Although a missed period is a sign of pregnancy, it can also have other causes. There is no reason to panic if she hasn't even been tested yet. For some counsel and support she could try locating a crisis pregnancy center (CPC). A CPC can offer a bit of support through her situation as well as practical help, and they also offer a free pregnancy test.

Your girlfriend's fears are real and genuine fears, and although things will likley be O.K. in the long run, in the short run things may be a tad topsey turvey for a while. Don't try to "minimize" them, but help her work through them.

If she is pregnant, the best thing you can really do is to just keep reassuring her of what you have already said here. Fear of telling parents is very common, and very powerful. Most of the time the fear turns out to be the worst part. Encourage her to tell her parents because getting that out of the way takes off an enormous amount of pressure. Offer to go with her if that will help (and if her dad is not prone to violence. LOL) If it makes her feel better, plan out best and worst case scenarios and show her that they can be dealt with. It is unlikely that everyone is going to hate her, although a few of her friends most likely won't know how to handle it, especially in the beginning. It's not unusual, however, to find many who will stand by her during this time as well and she may even make some good friends in the process. You find out who your true friends are... which by itself is a tad scary. Is there anyone at the school that she respects and trusts that might be supportive? If so, see if she will seek the counsel of that person.

Has anyone at her school gotten pregnant before? What happened? Does she have any real events to base her fears on, or just what she expects?

At any rate, I admire you for being willing to take responsibility. That is the biggest and best thing you can do for her.

--Melanie

P.S. Let me know what you find out. If you need help finding a center, please feel free to e-mail me.
[> [> Subject: Re: Unplanned pregnancy... Freaking out... please help


Author:
Tracey
[Edit]

Date Posted: 07/14/06 7:51am

Jon~
Welcome to our board! We're so glad you found us! First things first, you need to find out if she is in fact pregnant. A missed period could be the result of many different issues besides pregnancy. I think it's wonderful that you are being so supportive and loving...we usually have the opposite situation here. Since she's missed her period, a regulalr home pregnancy test will do fine. If she is in fact pregnant, we will be more than happy to help guide and direct you both. But first, find out for sure! This may be an eye opener for you both as well...it helps you to realize this is why God specifically created sex for marriage. But I'm not here to preach...nobody's perfect! :) Jon, please continue to keep us posted and let us know the results! We're here for you!
God bless,
Tracey



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