| Subject: Re: hi |
Author:
Heather
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Date Posted: 08/29/06 7:41pm
In reply to:
shelby
's message, "Re: hi" on 08/29/06 2:34pm
Shelby,
I think your decision to place your girl with another family is an incredibly beautiful one and I am amazed at the maturity and grace you carry for your age. Adoptions are wonderful, almost always win/win situations and in addition to giving an inexpressible gift of joy to another couple, you are giving a gift of pure maternal love towards your daughter that is thinking so selflessly of her. Congratulations on making such a beautiful choice.
As an aside, my husband was adopted. His birthmother wass 15 when she conceived him and almost had an abortion but decided at the very last minute to let him live and place him for adoption. When I consider what an amazing, loving man (both husband and father and human being) this person I married is I am so incredibly thankful to his birthmom for giving him life. His adoptive parents raised him beautifully and he now enjoys a friendship with his birthmom, too.
Most adoptions today are open adoptions, which means that you as the birthmom will get to choose who you want to be the parents for your little one, and you can decide also how much contact you'd like to keep. The adoption agency will set you up with parents who have the same views as you on this. Some birthmoms don't want any contact, some request photos and an 'update letter' twice a year, some want to be able to visit the child from time to time, etc. It's entirely up to you but the point is that there is a great deal of flexibility to accomodate you as the birthmom for what your ideal is.
Prospective parents fill out profiles where they include their photos, history, descriptions of themselves and their philosophies in raising children, etc. You'll get a chance to look through all these, select a few that you think would make good parents for your daughter, and you can meet them first if you like, too. Many parents will be more than happy to keep the name you select. You can make this one of your 'requirements' if you like.
It's very easy to find adoption agencies in the yellow pages or online, but if you want any assistance at all you can go to your local Pregnancy Resource Center and they will totally walk you through everything.
I am very moved by choice, Shelby, and think you're an amazing person. I'll keep on praying for you that God will shower His grace on you and your daughter and fill you with peace.
With Much Respect,
Heather
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