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Subject: Re: Please help me and my kids


Author:
Sharon
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Date Posted: 03/31/10 9:09am
In reply to: Terrah 's message, "Please help me and my kids" on 03/27/10 6:34am

Terrah,

You need to make a break from this man. And, please, please, please don't let your little one pay with its life for his being a jerk. You are stronger than you think. You can see right through the lies he's told you. You know you're worthy of love and you know that HE has to claim FULL responsibility for HIS cheating. I know you say you're "weak", but I think you'd surprise yourself if you committed yourself to washing your hands of him.

There are a lot of resources available for women and children. You need to be sure to get on the W.I.C. program. That provides you with free vouchers for milk, eggs, cheese, iron-fortified cereal, fruit juice, peanut butter, and beans! It's a wonderful program and has a very high income ceiling (meaning you can make quite a bit of money and STILL be eligible for it ;-) In fact, it covers you through your entire pregnancy and for one year after the baby is born, if you decide to nurse. If you don't nurse, it covers your baby until he or she is 5-years-old. It would cover all of your other children up to age 5, too! To get on the program, contact your County Health Nurse at your County Courthouse.

It sounds like you are a spiritual person. I'd strongly recommend praying and asking for strength and wisdom. You need strength to withstand the temptation to take your husband back. He is not a good influence on you or on your children. And, he says he'll shape up, but he doesn't. You've given him MANY chances. He's emotionally abusive. You deserve to be free of that. God can show you a path to freedom from that abuse. And, pray for strength to be the strong mother you obviously are, to protect your little one and not sacrifice him or her as the "easy" way out. It would haunt you forever if you did. I don't say that to everyone, but from what you've posted, I feel very strongly that you would live with tremendous regret and remorse.

You have four children depending upon you. You need to take care of YOU and be free of this man's detrimental effect on your life.

I will say a prayer for you for strength and peace and God's guidance. I know He will show you the way.

Sharon

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[> Subject: Re: Please help me and my kids


Author:
Terrah
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Date Posted: 04/ 1/10 1:26pm

Hello ladies. Thank you for the input..
I know when I first posted I talked about doing unecessary things that do go against my beliefs an morals. I cant believe I seriously contemplated that and it makes me feel like an awful human being.
I stand true in what I believe. God never gives us more then we can handle. There are days where i just cry and cry and cry and cry out to the Lord asking him why he has done this but I know it wasnt him who has done this, it was me and the decisions I chose. I know he is trying to tell me something but I still am not 100% on what it is that he is trying to speak. I do ask him to show me the way in all of this and I know eventually he will bring the truth to light. The knowledge and understanding will just make me grow into a stronger human being physically, mentally and spiritually with God.
I am feeling horrible! The MS is at full force, im tired exhausted etc.etc. and I know physically feeling ill is making me more hesitant to this experience but I am looking forward in to when that all leads up. Ex says he will do whatever it takes. I know this is all BS! Thn I hate the tiny voice in back of my head that says maybe this will wake him up, maybe this is Gods way of waking him up.. He claims to be saved which Im no one to judge but his actions clearly demonstrate this is not true. I want to laugh at this sometimes.
I have ALOT of growing to do personally to become closer to God and have that intimate relationship with him like I am yearning for.
Thanks for listening..

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[> [> Subject: Re: Please help me and my kids


Author:
Sharon
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Date Posted: 04/ 2/10 6:52am

Terrah,

Don't be too hard on yourself about having thought about abortion. I, too, considered abortion when I first found I was pregnant years ago. And, I'd always considered myself pro-life and had thought I'd never have an abortion. I, thank God, chose to NOT abort. Instead of feeling "guilty" I've chose to feel "grateful"! That's a much more positive way to look at it, I figure, than to beat myself up about having considered something when I was scared and confused.

You're in my prayers.

Sharon

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[> [> Subject: Re: Please help me and my kids


Author:
Pat
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Date Posted: 04/ 2/10 10:42am

Hello, Terrah,

That is excellent news!

There are natural remedies for MS, and you may find it beneficial to learn about them and try some of them. One of my favorite web sites that discusses natural remedies is drmercola.com . I seem to recall that he talks about MS. He has a good search engine.

It usually takes awhile for us to figure out what God is up to, and even then, we don't entirely know. But I have found that lessons learned during times of hardship are often very useful later in life. I didn't know why God gave me our youngest child. I sure didn't want to be pregnant! What I didn't know at the time, is that among other things, this child would take care of my mother-in-law during her last year of life so that in the end, she would come to Christ. I also have learned that sometimes people mistakenly think they are saved, and sometimes they deliberately deceive. I was a person who married a man I thought had accepted Christ. He thought so, too. He did live a moral life. But for other reasons, it made life difficult for many years, but in the end, I am happy to report that he really did, it totally changed things (starting a little while beforehand), and was also a factor in my MIL coming to Christ (because otherwise, I wouldn't have known her).

God also sometimes gives us children to call us to greater maturity, and to remind us we are grass, and need to depend on Him. I've walked in your shoes. There was a time when someone tried to deceive and coerce me into an abortion, and I almost caved in. I felt exactly the same way you do, when I found out. I shouldn't have yielded to fear. Sometimes we tend to forget we are sinners.

Don't dwell on what your ex promises. Leave him be. Let him work out his own misbehavior. He needs to face God as well, so stay out of the way, and let God deal with him. You can tell him that he hasn't given you any reasons to trust him, and that will have to change before you will even talk about it. That means he has to stop spending time with the other woman. He has a duty to provide for his other child, and that would cost you if you two got back together. Or, he can choose to sever his parental rights and give her sole custody. She stole something that belonged to you: your husband. It's a tough question because of the innocent child involved. So give it a lot of thought, and don't do anything hasty.

We'd love to continue to hear from you. Please take care!

Hugs,
Pat

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