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Subject: Re: Young, pregnant and considering adoption


Author:
Heather
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Date Posted: 05/22/10 2:39pm
In reply to: Courtney 's message, "Re: Young, pregnant and considering adoption" on 05/21/10 1:40pm

Hi Courtney,

I'm glad you found this forum! The women here are great. I was impressed reading your posts - you seem to be able to hold on to the important things while being real about the fear in the 'logistics.'

First of all, for what it's worth I'd love to encourage you in holding fast to your conviction about honoring the life of the new human being inside of you. Your son or daughter will be a miracle beyond words. God has an interesting way of weaving tapestries - so 'unlike' how we would have planned things. I can relate!

I really respect your 'not really being into the 'my body my choice' bitter sounding chip on the shoulder. There is so much life and wisdom, and honor towards our Creator in realizing it isn't all about us, and we aren't gods unto ourselves.

However, there is also wisdom and truth in realizing that it's okay to decline and totally put out of your mind pressure from anyone (in this case, your ex) to kill another human being you don't wish to kill. Ultimately, it IS your choice, and no one but you will understand or have to live with the results (in either direction!) It is neither selfish nor bitter to rule out immoral options that you alone will have to bear the scarring (physical and emotional) for.

If you decide to try to raise this little one yourself (many women have gone on before you in this regard, trembling but finding it works out!) I do hope you'll take advantage of the countless ways your local Pregnancy Resource Center can help you. All their services are free and they can help A LOT!

If you decide to lovingly place this little one for adoption, this can also be a win/win situation. Imagine the inexpressible gift given. My husband, one of the most awesome men ever, and a fantastic father, was adopted from birth - his birthmother was 15 years old and pregnant from a one night stand. She was seriously pressured to abort this 'mistake' but by God's grace she managed to take the path of life, and I am, of course, so, so glad she did.

Feel free to keep posting here to decompress as much as you can! Heaven knows this is a huge crossroads for you. Please know there's a woman out here in California that is praying for you. :)

Don't forget to take good care of yourself in the midst of all this turbulence - lots of rest, good food, etc. So many other women have expressed that this, what you're going through right now, is the very hardest part of an unplanned pregnancy. The processing the news and being ambivalent about what to do. Once the decision is made to embrace the unexpected and work with it, the stress levels
decrease dramatically. We all know the path isn't 'easy' in any case, but the foundation is set positively and this helps tremendously.

With Kindness,

Heather

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