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Date Posted: 22:42:29 06/25/09 Thu
Author: CHANNEL 666 NEWS
Subject: Stoned Wallabies Blamed for Crop Circles..

Stoned Wallabies Blamed for Crop Circles

You may think extraterrestrials are to blame for crop circles, but apparently, it's actually drugged-out wallabies.

It turns out that Scully and Mulder got it completely wrong. According to Tasmanian state officials, wallabies are the miscreants behind the creation of crop circles found in local opium fields. The cute critters feast on the poppy seeds and then get "high as a kite," hopping in circles and trampling the crops.

Wallabies aren't the only animals going on all night drug binges, other sources have reported that sheep and deer regularly get into the poppy fields and exhibit the same strange behavior - walking in circles repetitively until they eventually "crash." With 49,420 acres worth of poppy fields, it's a wonder there are any animals left in Tasmania that can still walk straight.

Though the crop circles seem to be an innocent byproduct of devouring the "Dover's Powder," I believe they're actually in cahoots with aliens to bring ultimate destruction upon the human race. That's right. I'm onto you, wallabies.

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