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Date Posted: 22:41:57 03/31/08 Mon
Author: jj ("Finding Out at 40")
Subject: Re: I have no one else to talk to about this...
In reply to: Teel 's message, "Re: I have no one else to talk to about this..." on 00:54:00 03/29/08 Sat

Nick, well it sounds like you found out long before your marriage. You have to face your responsibility here - you have the information - she's probably frightened to death.

I am not an advocate of couples staying married, "As long as they remain faithful." It's like, "You can be Gay - as long as you pretend you're not." Could YOU do that? Could YOU pretend to be gay? Of course not. So perhaps this journey will lead you to truth and a really deep friendship. If it is true, and all signs point to it, that your wife is a lesbian, it doesn't mean she doesn't love you or that you were a failure.

Many of us here are control freaks. I'm just saying be honest with yourself as well. And good luck. Many opinions here, mine isn't always popular. And I also should say you are dangerously heading toward that FINDING OUT AT 40 ZONE if you pursue this. And then you might have children. Being one of those who found out at 40, I can safely say that it is a VERY difficult thing to start your life over when you thought it was all tucked in, believe me.

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