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Date Posted: 14:17:04 07/02/09 Thu
Author: David ((careful there))
Subject: Re: Is My wife having an emotional affair with her best girl friend of 25 years??
In reply to: Maxpain 's message, "Re: Is My wife having an emotional affair with her best girl friend of 25 years??" on 11:24:12 07/01/09 Wed

Max,

You're very angry at what has happened and that makes complete sense - you've been hurt deeply and anger is a natural response. However, you seem to be directing a lot of it towards the GF. ("They have no moral compass what so ever. . . her best friend is very active church going catholic") Since when was church attendance predictive of moral behavior? Pedophile priests are very active church goers. So are Nazi colaborator Popes and KKK members.

Why be angry at the GF? You had no wedding vows with her. You parented no children together. Sure, she may be a "homewrecker", but it's your wife who has choose her own behavior. Not about being gay, but about marrying a man despite her orientation. And in how she came out and how she tries to blame you for the changes she wrought in her own life.

But it is hard to be angry at someone you still love. Just as it is hard to grief the loss of person and the relationship you valued when she's still in the picture. Therapy could help with that - to give a safe palce to explore and vent that anger rather than carry it around or, worst of all for you and your kids, to act on it. Joining MMTL (Men Married to Lesbians) would be another avenue for venting - in that case to hundreds of other guys who all "get it".

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